Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Me at the bowling alley feeling attacked by all the strikes and spares from pro bowlers like 🎳💥 'Excuse me, can you kindly miss a few shots so I can pretend I have a chance in this game, please?' 😆 #BowlingStruggles"

activity, actually, bowling, competition, doing, friends, frustration, fun, fun activity, going, good, good player, nothing, outing, people, player, skill, social, social outing, why, worse

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The only thing you can count on with some people is that you can’t count on them.

0

2 months ago

count, cynicism, humor, inconsistency, only, people, relationships, reliability, sarcasm, thing, trust
This Thanksgiving, don’t ask me questions about my life, just pass the mashed potatoes.

0

1 month ago

ask, dinner, family, family dinner, holiday, humor, just, life, mashed, mashed potato, me, pass, potato, question, questions, Thanksgiving
Sorry I can’t have a pleasant, safe and affordable life, my government said no.

0

2 months ago

affordable, commentary, government, humor, i, irony, life, pleasant, safe, social, social commentary, sorry
Petition to make check-in at hotels 11am and check-out 3pm, not the other way around. Like, WTF?

0

2 months ago

around, check-in, check-out, checkout, confusion, frustration, hotel, petition, time, travel, WTF
Never understood when the movie rating says “May contain nudity.” Are there people on the ratings board who aren’t sure if they just saw someone naked?

0

2 months ago

board, comedy, confusion, contain, critique, film, film critique, humor, just, movie, movie rating, naked, never, nudity, people, rating, ratings, ratings board, saw, someone, sure
I just want to be rich enough to stop having to pretend that I’m getting work done.

0

2 months ago

ambition, getting, humor, i, just, money, pretend, rich, sarcasm, stop, want, work

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

76 shares on WeChat this month:

When my cat gets in trouble I call him by his full name, Catthew.

85 shares on Instagram this month:

If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’ll be running a 0.002K this weekend to raise awareness for laziness.

67 shares on Reddit this month:

Social media may have been a mistake.

42 shares on TikTok this month:

In university, you are either struggling academically, financially, emotionally, or all three.

34 shares on Discord this month:

Went to the hairdresser today and now I look much younger. I’m thinking about going back tomorrow.

73 shares on Threads this month:

My kids act like they’re afraid of monsters, when they are literally the most terrifying creatures I’ve ever met.

72 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Teens be like, “You know that crumbled up piece of paper that’s been on the table all week? I need it for school.”

57 shares on Snapchat this month:

Staring sadly at the empty ice cream bowl that’s too small for licking.

25 shares on Facebook this month:

My comments on your home decor are not criticisms, they are deep concerns.

33 shares on Twitch this month:

I’d probably be a very chill werewolf, even during a full moon.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

When I say I like when older men tell me what to do, I am talking about Yoda and his teachings.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

Ask your girlfriend for her ring size and then give her a personalized bowling ball.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

My Saturday was going really well, until I realized it’s Sunday!

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

Preparing for my beach vacation by watching Jaws.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

At my age I don’t sleep, I nap between pee breaks.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

Saw a shooting star and made a wish for everyone to stop talking to me.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

If you see me sad, just hug me and put some money in my pocket.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

The older I get, the more I lose my looks. But I’m also losing my eyesight, so it’s not my problem.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

If kids these days had a perfume, it would be called Audacity.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

I’m not fragile like a flower. I’m fragile like a bomb.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

I woke up, got out of bed, and had coffee. I think that’s enough for one day.

Trending via WeChat:

If I had known I looked this sexy in glasses, I would’ve stopped being able to see a long time ago.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Obsessed with how Siri just doesn’t work at all, ever.

Seen just now on Facebook:

It is very hard to set aside the time to do your taxes when you are really busy doing other things like eating a snack or looking around the room.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Just know that somebody out there is thinking of you, and you should really lock your doors.

Just landed via Slack:

Shoutout to video games, man. I love having a reason to live.

Going bananas on X:

So I think the mammals have now ravaged this planet long enough. It’s time for the reptiles to take over again.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

I’m not gaining weight, I’m retaining candy.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

Australia is like someone’s still playing Jumanji.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Marriage is for life. But when that was first said, life was shorter.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Genuinely nothing worse than going bowling with people who are actually good. Like, why are you doing all that?

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The only thing you can count on with some people is that you can’t count on them.

This Thanksgiving, don’t ask me questions about my life, just pass the mashed potatoes.

Sorry I can’t have a pleasant, safe and affordable life, my government said no.

Petition to make check-in at hotels 11am and check-out 3pm, not the other way around. Like, WTF?

Never understood when the movie rating says “May contain nudity.” Are there people on the ratings board who aren’t sure if they just saw someone naked?

I just want to be rich enough to stop having to pretend that I’m getting work done.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨