Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Sign me up for Goat Life! 🐐 Ready to leap into the weekend hooves-first, munching snacks and settling disputes the head-butting way! 😂🙌"

activity, adult, animal, anyone, around, eat, even, fun, fun activity, goat, human, humor, i, independence, jump, me, randomness, rebellion, relief, stress, stress relief, want

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

When you are in your 20s, there is going to be an urge to binge The Sopranos. it is very important that you press play.

0

4 weeks ago

20s, advice, binge, entertainment, going, important, play, press, show, Sopranos, The Sopranos, TV, TV Show, twenty, urge
My career goal is to be able to just delete my LinkedIn account at some point.

0

2 months ago

able, account, career, career goal, delete, detox, digital, digital detox, goal, humor, job, just, LinkedIn, media, online, online presence, point, presence, social, social media
A man rejecting my advances can’t hurt me. I have a dog who leaves the bed every time I climb in.

0

2 months ago

advances, bed, companionship, dog, every, humor, hurt, i, man, me, rejection, relationships, time
You don’t use a semicolons correctly; you use a semicolon confidently.

0

2 months ago

confidence, grammar, humor, language, punctuation, semicolons, writing
Whitening my teeth by getting a tan.

0

2 months ago

beauty, getting, humor, irony, self-care, skincare, tan, tanning, teeth, teeth whitening, whitening
When I turned into the harbor of marriage, I didn’t know that a warship was anchored there.

0

2 months ago

commitment, expectations, harbor, humor, i, know, marriage, relationship, surprise, turned, warship

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

48 shares on TikTok this month:

Sometimes a girl has to delete all the apps on her phone and not speak to anyone for a week to find true happiness.

95 shares on Messenger this month:

Science can’t explain it, but some hairs can grow up to a quarter inch overnight. Never in a good spot though.

31 shares on Pinterest this month:

Many greetings from my coffee. Y’all are talking too much again.

53 shares on Telegram this month:

So tonight me and my phone are playing hide and seek. So far my phone is winning.

66 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m getting to the age where it’s rude to pull out a bottle of ibuprofen if I don’t have enough for everyone.

15 shares on Facebook this month:

“I’m disgusted by how many of you still use Spotify. I use a fair trade, ethically conscientious mom-and-pop platform called Apple Music.”

76 shares on Telegram this month:

Even in my early 20’s, I was diagnosed with late stage 40’s.

67 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Why do flat earthers care so much? Like, what if the Earth is flat. What now?

77 shares on YouTube this month:

If you scroll Twitter long enough, you too can burn calories by shaking your head.

30 shares on Instagram this month:

This is not what adulthood looked like in the brochure.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

If a portal opened up in front of me, I’d go in—no questions asked.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

I’d be less aggressive in the morning if I could drive to work in a tank.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

“Fries or salad?” sums up every adult decision you have to make.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

Humans can accomplish so much, unless it’s parking at a shopping center during the holidays.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

If Shakespeare were being born today, he’d be “Shaxxespyr.”

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

We all have that person who insists on using a blanket on the couch, no matter the weather.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has viewed:

My housemates are convinced our house is haunted. I’ve lived here for 274 years and not noticed anything strange.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

“I bought this while depressed” should be an acceptable reason to get a full refund on a return.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

Praying none of y’all are unwrapping podcast equipment.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

My wife almost fell down the stairs today and that got us into a heated argument whether my gasp was out of concern or excitement.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

The lion is actually pretty concerned right now.

Going viral on YouTube:

Women don’t apologize. They sleep naked and let you decide whether you are still angry or not.

Going bananas on Threads:

Just because I’m awake doesn’t mean I’m ready to do things.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

‘Tis the season to wrap objects in colorful paper with the fine motor skills of a T-Rex.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Can’t. Inventing new things to worry about.

Spotted on YouTube:

How does pasta water know when you’re not looking?

Just landed via Snapchat:

Politics top tip: Gain people’s trust by telling them that everyone is lying to them.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Just walked by an empath and his head exploded.

Making waves on WeChat:

I might be late to a lot of places, but the airport is not one of them.

Making waves on Threads:

I was hoping to age like a fine wine, but I sort of feel more like an avocado.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I don’t want to adult anymore. Don’t even want to be human. I want to be a goat. Jump around randomly, eat what I want, and head-butt anyone who annoys me.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

When you are in your 20s, there is going to be an urge to binge The Sopranos. it is very important that you press play.

My career goal is to be able to just delete my LinkedIn account at some point.

A man rejecting my advances can’t hurt me. I have a dog who leaves the bed every time I climb in.

You don’t use a semicolons correctly; you use a semicolon confidently.

Whitening my teeth by getting a tan.

When I turned into the harbor of marriage, I didn’t know that a warship was anchored there.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨