Wordgag ใƒ„

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

Funny Quotes Total

Funny Quotes Topics

Updated

Users Online

I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

Commentary:
"Who knew the mothership had such strict house rules? ๐Ÿ‘ฝ๐Ÿš€ At least those aliens have good hygiene standards! Maybe next time they'll abduct you for a playdate?! ๐Ÿช๐ŸŒŒ"



Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

Funny Quotes Total

Funny Quotes Topics

Updated

Users Online

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡พ has shared:

Is Mercury in reggaeton?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฟ has downloaded:

Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. Thereโ€™s nothing like learning from the best.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ท has shared:

Flex on your kids by asking โ€œare we there yet?โ€ before they do.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ณ has bookmarked:

Don’t compare yourself with others. Everyone is better than you.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฌ has downloaded:

Sorry, but if youโ€™re walking slower than me on the sidewalk, youโ€™re my enemy. Walking faster than me? Also my enemy. Now if youโ€™re walking at the same speed as me… hmm, yeah, Iโ€™m thinking enemy.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ฌ has shared:

I’m not going to die because of an accident. Nor because of an illness. But from small talk. Someone will say one boring sentence too many and I’ll drop dead.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ช๐Ÿ‡ธ has copied:

Can you check if my lips taste like cherries?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has copied:

If youโ€™re having trouble finding the match to one of your socks, throw it away and the missing one will immediately show up. Follow me for more life hacks.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ณ has copied:

I ghost family members too, so believe me, bro โ€” itโ€™s not personal.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ธ has copied:

Did you guys hear about the โ€œinternetโ€? Apparently, you can say literally anything there.