How do people post 25 times a day? The only thing I can do 25 times a day is pee. Posted onMay 29, 2026
Rewatching Avengers: Age of Ultron. Despite the title, they never tell you how old Ultron is. Posted onMay 29, 2026
My toxic trait is thinking every inconvenience is the universe personally attacking me. Posted onMay 29, 2026
Sometimes you have to sit back and imagine what life could be if it wasn’t a horrifying nightmare. Posted onMay 29, 2026
Christmas is a very special time when I give my brother a $100 gift card, and he gives me a $100 gift card. Posted onMay 29, 2026
That boring, introverted life you’re living has probably protected you from a lot of harm and bad experiences. Posted onMay 29, 2026
The worst person you know is in therapy right now, being told they need to put themselves first. Posted onMay 29, 2026
The amount of sleeping I’ve done over the past few days has been phenomenal. I genuinely love doing absolutely nothing. Posted onMay 29, 2026
“I’m tired of being forced to eat microplastics. I’m ready for big plastics now.” Posted onMay 29, 2026
Toxic girlfriend who goes through her boyfriend’s calculator app and asks why he’s doing the equations he’s doing. Posted onMay 29, 2026
Totally forgot my demands now that I’ve strapped this ticking bomb to my chest. Posted onMay 29, 2026
Watching a movie and using a laser pointer to indicate where my fellow viewers should be looking for an optimal viewing experience. Posted onMay 29, 2026
Why does Bruce Wayne, the billionaire, not simply rig Gotham City’s elections in favor of tough-on-crime candidates? Posted onMay 29, 2026
The absolute hottest thing you can do in front of a woman is tame a horse, but unfortunately, modern life affords us little opportunities for that. Posted onMay 29, 2026
Can’t believe my neighbor rang my doorbell at 3 a.m. last night… Luckily, I was still up playing the drums. Posted onMay 29, 2026