Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

You’re no Sultan of Swing, buddy, you’re hardly a Governor of Groove.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

You can’t stop me. My tampon wrapper told me I was bold and brilliant.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

They should have a special lane for texting and driving.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Got fired on my first day working at the drugstore for calling my new coworkers ‘my pharmily’.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

Every guy wants to be called Daddy till that test comes back positive.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Dating a smart man, so I actually can turn my brain off when he is around.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

My most abusive relationship is with my own brain.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

How long are you allowed to hide in the bathroom during family visits?

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

I like you so much, I’d actually learn your phone number.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has copied:

America is truly the best country in the world at not learning from their mistakes.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,676

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Messenger:

Nurse: “This may hurt.” Me: “My life hasn’t been much fun either.”

Trending via Messenger:

I can’t keep up anymore. Happy birthday to everyone for the rest of your life.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Mentally saying “Wed-Nes-Day” when writing the word Wednesday.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Italians, look away now. I break my spaghetti in half before I cook it.

Going viral on Reddit:

Drove by a woman with her car broke down, I was going to stop and help until I remembered I don’t know anything about cars or women.

Going bananas on Discord:

I think when girls start liking pink again, it means they’re healing.

Live now on Pinterest:

Babysitting a pair of twin babies right now and feeding them saying “here comes the airplane”. I don’t know, just feels weird.

Just shared via Messenger:

There should be a true crime story about feeding someone a peanut butter sandwich and giving them nothing to drink.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I’m heading to the beach without a beach body.

Just shared via Snapchat:

When I die, I hope I’m remembered for my ability to take any bad situation and make it worse.

Paid my rent and slept in every room of my house this week, kitchen and laundry room next.

3 weeks ago

Playful quote about enjoying every room at home, humorously highlighting domestic comfort.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Living that luxury lifestyle where my couch and stovetop become my guest rooms! 🛋️🍳🏰

every, home, house, humor, kitchen, laundry, laundry room, laziness, next, paid, plan, procrastination, rent, room, sleep, week, weekend, weekend plan

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

64 shares on TikTok this month:

Therapy only works if you have a lower IQ than the therapist.

50 shares on Snapchat this month:

Being insane should at least burn calories.

52 shares on Slack this month:

The final level of being smart is just pretending you don’t know anything to make your life easier.

53 shares on Reddit this month:

The ‘E’ in my name stands for ‘Everything you need.’

54 shares on Telegram this month:

I hope this email makes you quit your job.

37 shares on Instagram this month:

If history repeats itself, I’m getting a pet dinosaur.

99 shares on Telegram this month:

People who ask “Can I call you” are so sweet. Like, obviously you cannot, but so sweet.

42 shares on Telegram this month:

Fitness influencer: It’s important to listen to your body. Body: You’re old. And you want lasagna.

61 shares on Reddit this month:

“There are no words in the English language that have all the vowels in alphabetical order,” he said facetiously.

83 shares on X this month:

BREAKING: OpenAI to partner with OpenAI to help fund OpenAI. OpenAI up 90%.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

Saying “shut up” before skipping the YouTube ad is literally necessary.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

How does world hunger exist when we can fry air?

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

You can name literally any food or drink to the dentist and they’ll be like “ohhh, that’s actually so bad for your teeth. You should only eat water and toothpaste.”

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

People at the library need to learn how to be quiet. Some of us are trying to beatbox over here.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

Babymaking music but it’s the Benny Hill theme song.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

I just tried to poach an egg and I now understand why Eggs Benedict is $23

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

When I’m president, everyone who listens to techno, house or rap will be allowed to drive a little faster than others.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

Love how Batman: The Animated Series seems to take place in the 40s and the 50s and the 70s and the 90s all at once.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

Any room can be a panic room if you just give me a second.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

If I don’t reply, assume I opened your message, nodded, and then got distracted.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on TikTok:

I would like to opt out of WW3, por favor.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Ground beef implies the existence of sky beef.

Just shared via X:

If you don’t want to be in love with me that’s fine. You’re entitled to your wrong and very stupid opinions.

Just shared via Telegram:

Y’all are single because y’all are looking for 90’s love in this sick generation.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Cocaine is God’s way of telling you that you make too much money.

Trending via Pinterest:

It’s too bad he never woke up and chose violence. “Bob Ross, mob boss” has a nice ring to it.

Going viral on Reddit:

Men be like, “But I’m different.” Yeah, a different type of disappointment.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Whenever Im in trouble, I think, what would Jesus do? Then I pretend to be dead and disappear for 3 days.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

She poured the milk before the cereal. It was not meant to be.

Going bananas on Slack:

You ever have your knees crack so good that you expect them to glow in the dark. Yeah, me too.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Paid my rent and slept in every room of my house this week, kitchen and laundry room next.

The unemployed urge to say I love you during a job interview.

A few months after the wedding, Cinderella’s husband began to complain about her having too many shoes.

“Each to their own!” Translation: You’re wrong, but never mind.

This can’t be the same brain I was using to read 750-page novels in 3 days during middle school.

So a baby crawls across the floor to it’s bottle and it’s cute but when I do it Im in need of an intervention?

Sign at the zoo says “don’t stick your hand in the alligator cage”. Thanks, but I’ll do my own research.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Paid my rent and slept in every room of my house this week, kitchen and laundry room next.

Keep the laugh going 😂

The unemployed urge to say I love you during a job interview.

A few months after the wedding, Cinderella’s husband began to complain about her having too many shoes.

“Each to their own!” Translation: You’re wrong, but never mind.

This can’t be the same brain I was using to read 750-page novels in 3 days during middle school.

So a baby crawls across the floor to it’s bottle and it’s cute but when I do it Im in need of an intervention?

Sign at the zoo says “don’t stick your hand in the alligator cage”. Thanks, but I’ll do my own research.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨