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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

We should put a tariff on being mean to me.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

I love wearing sunglasses. Am I looking at your face? Am I looking at your ass? No one knows.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

I’m a “I have an appointment later, so I can’t do anything else for the rest of the day” kind of person.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

Whenever I’m willing to sell my soul, there’s usually food involved.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

That moment you turn down the music while driving around looking for a street address, so you can see better.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

I’d never pick the lesser of two evils because that means they’re not even good at being evil either.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

I love how one day my body just decided “You know what you really need is some ear hair.”

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

Wooden pews are designed to maximize the shame of farting in church.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

If I ever had to fight a bear, I hope it’s a gummy bear.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

I stay up late every night, regret it in the morning, and the next day I do it all over again.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2328 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,490

Funny Quotes Topics

15,193

Funny Quotes Images

12,490

Updated

36 minutes ago

Users Online

3,453

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Twitch:

A month in Italy has halved my will to work and doubled my desire for money.

Live now on Pinterest:

How do you text “okay” but in the rudest way possible?

Trending via Discord:

I just tried to groom my dog myself, and I now fully understand why the dog groomer charges more for a haircut than my own stylist.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Men have nice skin because they stress out everyone but themselves.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I could never work in an aquarium. I would have a penguin under my shirt at the end of the shift.

Making waves on TikTok:

Hey, sorry I cant make it tonight. I am beset on all sides by foes.

Just shared via Messenger:

At least I can say I tried. I didn’t try, but I can say I did.

Trending via Discord:

“We will go ahead and make these changes if we don’t hear from you before Friday” is such an elegant way to solve problems.

Spotted on Facebook:

Gender and sexuality aside, I believe everyone just wants someone who wears short shorts and makes a lot of noise in bed.

Going viral on Slack:

Problematic bed time gap relationship.

Third wheeling with two girls who are best friends is so much worse than third wheeling a couple.
Third wheeling with two girls who are best friends is so much worse than third wheeling a couple.
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Commentary:
Ah, the classic third-wheel dilemma! 🚴‍♂️ Being the uninvited guest at the best friend’s brunch is like trying to enjoy popcorn in a firework show—sure, you're there, but you're definitely not the star. 🍿🔥 Sometimes, third wheeling feels more like being the awkward punctuation in a love story—necessary, but often misunderstood. 😅 Still, hey, at least you're getting a front-row seat to comedy at its finest! 🎬😂

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2328 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,490

Funny Quotes Topics

15,193

Funny Quotes Images

12,490

Updated

36 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain, and most do.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has copied:

Due to inflation and tariffs, my love now costs a thing.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has shared:

What if i just replied “not now kitten daddy’s busy” to all my work emails?

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

Started from the bottom, now we a little bit above the bottom.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

Trying to carry a pet to bed is like moving a dense liquid that’s annoyed by you.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

Rise and grind your teeth gently while ruminating over every past mistake.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

Burger King implies the existence of an entire burger based feudal system.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

I talk to myself mostly because I am an excellent listener.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has copied:

I got fired for telling customers if they wanted “smoking or non-smoking”. Apparently, the correct term in the funeral home business is “cremation or burial”.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

I think the Discovery Channel should be on a different channel every day.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Hardest part of beekeeping is thinking of all the names.

Going viral on WeChat:

Parents be like “why aren’t you eating, don’t you like my food?” and after you eat a ton, they’ll say “you look a little chubby, maybe you should eat less.”

Broadcasted on Discord:

Sorry I’m unavailable… the horrors of reality insist upon themselves.

Trending via Twitch:

Happy to report that “what time is it/time for you to get a watch” is still being used by the youths.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I think the real reason this generation is so angry is that their music sucks.

Just landed via TikTok:

Common sense is so rare these days that it should be considered a superpower.

Reported on Telegram:

I’m glad nobody can see the face I make when I’ve just started the washing machine and then spot a sock on the floor.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Weird. I’m the only one naked at this gender reveal party.

Shared recently on Threads:

Let’s draft everyone who has their phone on military time first, since you’re all so eager.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I love the idea of a fruitarian, just morally affronted that anyone could eat a baby spinach.

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