Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Job hunting is just a treasure hunt where the treasure keeps getting relocated! 🗺️✨ If I find it, you'll hear the victory dance from miles away! 🎉💃

asking, awkward, awkward question, communication, conversation, dating, embarrassment, going, hear, humor, hunt, i, job, job hunt, job search, lot, promise, question, search, success

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

There’s a great new book on minimalism but I only read the blurb because I believe that’s what the author would want.

0

2 months ago

author, believe, blurb, book, great, humor, i, irony, minimalism, new, read, reading, sarcasm, want
They should invent a Twitter where the timeline doesn’t refresh against your will.

0

6 days ago

app, experience, frustration, invent, invention, media, refresh, should, social, social media, technology, timeline, Twitter, user, user experience, where
I hate being at the age where you feel obligated to buy your whole family gifts for Christmas, but also the age where your bank account doesn’t feel obligated to support that.

0

5 days ago

account, adulting, age, bank, bank account, being, buy, Christmas, family, family gift, feel, finance, gift, gifts, hate, holiday, holiday shopping, humor, i, money, obligation, shopping, support, where, whole
I have been so toxic and horny lately, I should probably start, like, reading a book or something.

0

3 weeks ago

book, horny, humor, i, lifestyle, reading, self-awareness, should, something, start, toxic
Needing to stretch is so funny. Your body is like “Ughhh, make me longer!”

0

2 months ago

activity, body, humor, longer, me, physical, physical activity, self-care, stretch
Time needs a speed limit.

0

2 months ago

humor, irony, life, limit, needs, philosophy, speed, time

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

88 shares on Instagram this month:

We need a word for that weird feeling you get when you learn what a podcaster looks like.

87 shares on Twitch this month:

The most important meal of the day is the next one.

13 shares on Instagram this month:

I just got lied to by 3K+ people. That recipe was awful.

33 shares on Slack this month:

Sheep to the left of me. Cows to the right. Here I am. Stuck on a bus with a view.

85 shares on YouTube this month:

Satan: “I’d tell you to go to Hell, but I work there and don’t wanna see you everyday.”

30 shares on Slack this month:

“Yeah no” is my favorite combo.

57 shares on YouTube this month:

Karma has taught me to never laugh at a stranger being attacked by a seagull.

63 shares on Telegram this month:

What if i just replied “not now kitten daddy’s busy” to all my work emails?

49 shares on Twitch this month:

One of the toughest jobs in parenting is serving the inevitable eviction notice on your kid’s pillow fort.

93 shares on Reddit this month:

They say white people don’t have their own culture, but I just got invited to a gender reveal party for a dog, and there’s no way we appropriated that from anyone else.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

The only men you can trust is ramen.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

I miss having that butterfly feeling. People give me roach vibes at this point.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has viewed:

According to my chocolate advent calendar, tomorrow is Christmas.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

Everyone hates on Gollum but he had the right idea: become a hermit, collect jewels, swim naked in lakes and pools, occasionally hiss at people who try to make you go places.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

Maybe Rome was built in a day. I wasn’t there.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

Every app is a dating app if you are creepy enough.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

Why are poets thinking that they are the ones tortured and not those who read their poetry?

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

Pretty sure I need to go back to bed and sleep for 3 days.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

Why do they make the wine glass so large if you’re not supposed to fill it to the top?

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

Due to inflation, you can now eat food that has been on the floor for up to 7.3 seconds.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Reddit:

Frodo is a beautiful name for a boy. Has a ring to it.

Seen just now on Messenger:

The bowling ball actually hangs out with the pins after work. There isn’t beef there.

Going bananas on WeChat:

The fewer the people, the greater the inner peace.

Going bananas on YouTube:

We should thank heaven for nipples. Without them boobs would be pointless.

Seen just now on Messenger:

As funny as it sounds, the easiest way to get women is by having a girlfriend.

Just shared via Instagram:

Your in his DMs, I’m on Etsy paying a witch to put a spell on him.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

You are depressed because your ancestors fought, danced, and ate meals together, and you eat alone in the dark while staring at a glowing rectangle.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Why would I date a nonchalant man? I like my men how I like my thong.

Trending via Slack:

Hobosexual. A person who dates you with the sole interest of having a place to stay.

Just shared via Messenger:

Being called by your real name in a relationship kinda sounds like a divorce.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Asking “how’s the job hunt going?” is a lot like asking “did you come?” I promise you, you’d hear if there was any success.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

There’s a great new book on minimalism but I only read the blurb because I believe that’s what the author would want.

They should invent a Twitter where the timeline doesn’t refresh against your will.

I hate being at the age where you feel obligated to buy your whole family gifts for Christmas, but also the age where your bank account doesn’t feel obligated to support that.

I have been so toxic and horny lately, I should probably start, like, reading a book or something.

Needing to stretch is so funny. Your body is like “Ughhh, make me longer!”

Time needs a speed limit.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨