Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

I did some soul searching last night. I’m happy to report I still have one.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

“Fox Mulder” is an aggressively sexy name.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

Currently helping my kids find the chocolate that I ate last night.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

Why are moths always out at night when they like light so much? Wait til y’all find out about the sun.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

Golf is a great way to learn all of the new curse words your subconscious has been cooking up in the lab.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

I bet this email finds you silently screaming on the inside.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

I’ve done the math and I regret to inform you I’m your soulmate.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

My superpower? Staying calm when talking to idiots.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

Blocking someone isn’t enough; I need their PornHub videos to always buffer, just as they’re about to climax.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,404

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Am I the only one who wonders why the Flintstones celebrate Christmas?

Shared recently on TikTok:

I finally became a butterfly, and everyone’s already asking what’s next.

Going viral on Instagram:

Can you imagine how hot I’d be if I ate right and took care of my body? I’m not gonna do it, but can you imagine?

Just shared via Telegram:

You’re never too old to shout, “Mooooo,” when you drive past some cows.

Spotted on Snapchat:

My life is simple, I see a queue of more than 6 people, I go home.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Life is really sucking the life out of me.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I did nothing wrong. I tried to do nothing and did it wrong.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

They expect me to work at work.

Just shared via Pinterest:

The closest I’ve come to mastering a martial art is figuring out how to wash my feet in the shower.

Trending via WeChat:

Christmas is coming and you’re not.

Based on the amount of laundry I wash each week, I’m starting to think there are people who live here that I haven’t met yet.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Sounds like your washing machine is secretly running an Airbnb! 🧺😂🧳

, , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

24 shares on LinkedIn this month:

When someone asks me why I’m leaving the party early, I say “I’m late for an appointment with my pajamas.”

15 shares on Messenger this month:

Am I the only one who wonders why the Flintstones celebrate Christmas?

16 shares on Twitch this month:

You get what you pay for. Unless the delivery man leaves it on your doorstep. Then the fastest person on your street gets what you paid for.

56 shares on Discord this month:

Objection your honor, if the prosecutor doesn’t have anything nice to say then he shouldn’t say anything at all.

40 shares on YouTube this month:

People be like “I love your energy” – then drain it.

98 shares on YouTube this month:

Writing is so fun because you get to google things like “woman names”.

99 shares on Discord this month:

If at first you don’t succeed, that’s so embarrassing. Why are you so bad at this?

48 shares on X this month:

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth. Then it’s a soap opera!

19 shares on TikTok this month:

I lied, there’s no sex. I just need you to change the batteries in my smoke detectors.

12 shares on Twitch this month:

When intelligence meets empathy and kindness, it’s so sexy.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

“You’re a cougar!” God forbid a woman gives back to the youth.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I like driving by myself. I just played the same song 36 times.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not lazy, I’m on energy-saving mode.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Not to brag, but I can shake your hand and forget your name simultaneously.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

If my TV’s so smart then why doesn’t it slap me when I turn on the news?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t remember what I wanted to be when I grew up, but I’m pretty sure it wasn’t a broke, stressed-out, over-thinker with no clothes that fit.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Let’s skip the getting-to-know-you phase. Just block me.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Had a shower and put on clean pajamas. It was a productive day.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

The only sunscreen that’s 100% effective is abstinence.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I haven’t posted a selfie in a while, but I’m still very cute. Just to keep you updated.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,402

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

We all need to put the phone down, or it’s over for civilization.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has viewed:

Stages of Christmas shopping: 1. There’s plenty of time. 2. Oh no!

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

Awake? You may be entitled to compensation.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

All I know for sure is that I could be wrong.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

In banana years, I am bread.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

Mama didn’t raise no fool, I turned into one all on my own.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

Retiring my wallet condom after two years of active duty. 87 tours with 0 combat deployments.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

How many filters does it take before it’s technically a painting?

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

I love it when strangers smile at me and I smile back, and we have that nice stranger smiling moment.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

“I’m at the age where, if I use the wrong pillow at night, it hurts to turn my head the next day.”

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on WeChat:

Never get in between a girl and her fries. It’s just common sense really.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Please leave me alone. I’m just a 3,000-year-old time-traveling alien who is trying to return to his home planet.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Nothing is hungrier than a Roomba that sees a charger cord.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Just so you know, it’s almost impossible to drink coffee while laying down.

Making waves on YouTube:

You can be anything. Be the person who ends the meeting early.

Shared recently on Messenger:

I made the mistake of clicking on an Instagram ad for a flannel shirt, and now the algorithm thinks I’m a lumberjack.

Just landed via YouTube:

At this point, if a clown invited me into the woods, I would just go.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Waiting until 4:59 p.m. on Fridays to send an email, because any response is Monday’s problem.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

It’s important to post stupid stuff so you can learn who likes you.

Going viral on Twitch:

At the doctor’s office, booing all the names being called that aren’t mine.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴