Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

I deserve a love so pure that my nervous system can finally rest.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

Never underestimate the healing power of a cheeseburger.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

I have a drawer in my kitchen that I can’t open anymore because of that one time I decided to put a spatula in it.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

Sorry for acting weird, I am weird, and it will happen again.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

It feels like a million o’clock right now.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

Responding to all selfies with “this should work.”

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

I hate it when I’m outside, and an insect lands and crawls on my glasses, and for a split second, I think aliens have invaded.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

I’m attracted to people that no one pays attention to.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

I need someone to convince me into or out of buying a jetski. I can’t keep living in this purgatory.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

The best part of having a failing memory is that you can wrap up presents for yourself, and when it comes time to open them, you are honestly surprised.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,442

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Be nice to your children’s teachers. Especially elementary ones, cause kids have loose lips and that teacher has all the dirt on you.

Shared recently on Messenger:

If you turn your phone off for 1 day, you’ll realize it’s still 2007 outside.

Going viral on Reddit:

When your stomach is really mad at you, and you’re not sure which one of your 13 unhealthy lifestyle choices is causing it.

Just shared via Discord:

A clever man fills his wife’s closet with so many clothes that no other man can fit in.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I need a weighted blanket that won’t let me get out of bed in the morning.

Live now on WeChat:

Most meetings end with the conclusion that everything needs to be discussed in another meeting.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Cooking your own meals really is the best way to devote 50 hours of your life every month to save $50.

Just landed via YouTube:

Why would I put money where my mouth is when wine exists?

Going viral on Pinterest:

According to the BMI chart, I am too short.

Seen just now on Reddit:

My therapist said I should face my fears. So I turned my phone back on.

Funny brighter quotes

Funny brighter quotes light up your day with a splash of humor and sunshine ☀️😂! Perfect for turning gloomy moments into bursts of laughter, these witty gems brighten moods and spark joy 🌈✨. Ready to add some sparkle and smiles to your feed? Get set for a collection that’s as uplifting as it is hilarious! 😄💡

New funny brighter quotes 👇

All funny brighter quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

78 shares on Reddit this month:

I am not living la vida loca. I am loca because of la vida.

87 shares on Threads this month:

(suicidal grindset guy) When I jump, it’s gonna be from the penthouse.

27 shares on TikTok this month:

How I clean my room: 1. Start in one corner. 2. Find something from six years ago and stare at it nostalgically for five hours. 3. Go to bed.

84 shares on Snapchat this month:

These days I just accept the website cookies without any protest. Website is like Grandma, I’m not gonna fight with her.

82 shares on TikTok this month:

Tons of names in my phones are “Kenny Landlord,” “Mike Electric,” or “Pete Do Not Answer,” and I just realized this is how Anglo surnames have always worked.

92 shares on TikTok this month:

Establish dominance by maintaining eye contact whilst twerking.

21 shares on TikTok this month:

I don’t wanna party like it’s 1999, I want to pay my bills like it’s 1999.

20 shares on Facebook this month:

Me: I have a cut under my fingernail. Universe: Excellent, I will send you an unusually high number of encounters with citrus fruit.

72 shares on Messenger this month:

No open job postings for “Warrior Poet” found in your area. Please try another search.

39 shares on Snapchat this month:

I thought I wanted a career. Turns out all I wanted is paychecks.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

My superpower is holding onto stuff for years and throwing it away exactly one week before I need it.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Call your family now and ask them what the wifi password is, so they have time to find the little paper it’s written on before Thanksgiving.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Look, babe, I’m sorry. If your fake British accent keeps being this geographically inconsistent, I’m going to have to cancel the medieval roleplay sex.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I’d be really slim if it wasn’t for birthdays, anniversaries, Easter, Christmas, Mother’s Day, weekends and me.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Life so stupid, I just want a burger and to be held.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry I’m late. It’s just because of who I am as a person.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Signing all emails with BOOM SHAKALAKA today.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

When I get bored on a Zoom meeting, I put a cursor under the speaker’s nose to make it look like they have a booger.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not addicted to Twitter. I’m just a really good listener so I want to know what everyone has to say.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Once you realize that no one really cares how you’re doing, it becomes much easier to answer the question.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,523

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

You ever spend the day with a skinny person and are like “ohhhh, that’s why you’re skinny”.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

Ask your girlfriend for her ring size and then give her a personalized bowling ball.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

I bring a very “are you going to eat your pickle” vibe to lunch meetings.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

“Thanks for your payment!” Shut up. I paid that bill against my will.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

Alexa, turn off the planet.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

My kid’s superpower is knowing he won’t like a food before he even tries it.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

Italians, look away now. I break my spaghetti in half before I cook it.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

Only at 27 do you become old, and then when you turn 30, you become younger than ever. That’s just how it goes.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

People never run off to join the circus anymore.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

Home is where you can say anything because nobody’s really listening, anyway.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via YouTube:

There’s nothing worse than being in public and you touch something that shouldn’t be sticky and it is.

Trending via YouTube:

Talking to animals doesn’t make you crazy, hearing them talk back does.

Going bananas on Messenger:

Trying to explain that I’m fascinated by Japan for wood joinery reasons and not nerd or pervert reasons.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Every man learns for himself the uselessness of owning an iPad.

Breaking via Facebook:

My New Years resolutions are to do some things, and stop doing some other things.

Spotted on Messenger:

I’m at the age where I consider any picture of me taken in the last ten years “current.”

Just shared via Snapchat:

People who live alone should get one practice conversation before they have to speak out loud for the first time that day.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Unfortunately, I will continue to get sexier and funnier.

Just shared via Telegram:

Can you imagine how awkward it would be if your pet went on your phone and found the 1,000 pictures you have of them sleeping.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Sundays are no place for pants or responsibility.

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