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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

Twitter hits different, cause it’s like the only social media app you can use effectively while playing music.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

One of the voices in my head brought up an excellent point, so obviously he had to go.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

“OMG I love your personality,” thanks, it’s a disorder.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

Whenever І wake up and see that someone has wrіtten a bunch of funny posts before noon, І assume they are a mornіng drіnker.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

Maybe coffee is addicted to me?

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

Stop roasting yourself, you’re not a marshmallow.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

Meetings are a wonderful way to help your employees take a break from being productive.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Dinosaurs are always described as “roaming” the earth, which is patronizing as hell, I bet they had places to go and important shit to do.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Life is short, unless you’re listening to a kid describing an episode of PAW Patrol.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

I would prefer not to.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

241 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,510

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,510

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,656

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

It’s important to post stupid stuff so you can learn who likes you.

Breaking via Snapchat:

When your electric toothbrush dies, it becomes a regular toothbrush. Don’t freak out. Just calm down and remember your training.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

It took me 5 minutes to do something I’ve been stressing about for 6 months. I will learn nothing from this.

Trending via WhatsApp:

My only regret is not leaving people alone the first time they moved funny.

Breaking via WeChat:

Right now somebody’s therapist is hearing about YOU.

Just landed via Reddit:

Cleaning out your camera roll is like the biggest chore ever.

Live now on Instagram:

There’s never a good place to clip your toenails at the library.

Live now on Facebook:

Bold of you to assume I have the energy to even climb a hill to die on.

Just shared via Slack:

The Airbnb reviews never tell you how comfortable the toilets are for falling asleep on.

Trending via Instagram:

I have a condition that prevents me from dieting. It’s called being hungry.

Funny broken down quotes

New funny broken down quotes 👇

Just cleaned my room in case Beyoncé was somewhere close to my house and her car broke down, and she needed somewhere to sleep.

0

3 months ago

Beyoncé, broke, broken, broken down, car, case, celebrity, cleaned, cleaning, close, house, humor, just, preparation, room, sleep, somewhere

Someone from 🇱🇦 has recently shared this quote.

119 shares on WeChat this month.

All funny broken down quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

86 shares on Telegram this month:

Your Honor, that doesn’t sound like me.

59 shares on Reddit this month:

When fireworks were invented, it was ‘hisssss’ to ‘wheeeee’ in the making.

32 shares on Facebook this month:

If every day is a gift, today is socks.

72 shares on Discord this month:

The place where you pour in the gas is the car’s gasshole.

45 shares on Pinterest this month:

90% of parenting is just thinking about when you can lie down again.

21 shares on Discord this month:

The laundromat should give you XP and ranks like “Slimelord” and “Glunkfather,” based on how dirty your clothes are.

80 shares on Reddit this month:

My wife and I always eat dinner as fast as possible so we can have a popsicle.

16 shares on Slack this month:

Twitter account so good even HR wants to see it.

30 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The hairdresser asking me what special plans I have for the day like this wasn’t it.

44 shares on X this month:

Stop asking me if I’m tired. Can’t I just be ugly?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

Good morning to everyone except those who need approval from strangers on the internet.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

Sex is like tacos. I wish I were having some now.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has shared:

Ctrl Alt delete my fat.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

I put the mess in domestic.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

“You look tired!” Bro, I want to stop existing.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

Coffee is better when you have no work.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

We were never supposed to have this much access to stupid people’s thoughts, beliefs, and opinions.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has copied:

I find myself thinking “God, I need a cigarette” way too often for someone who doesn’t actually smoke.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

They should invent a person for me and me only.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

When my friends and I talk about sex, it’s never sexual. It feels scientific, almost.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Pinterest:

My husband has entered the “fun socks” years.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Is stir-fry the only dish where the instructions are in the name?

Trending via Facebook:

Yes, I’d love to learn your family card game. I’m sure it won’t be excruciating at all.

Just landed via TikTok:

Every time I see a couple riding a tandem bike, I try to figure out which one of them is pissed about it.

Just shared via Messenger:

If I were a higher power, and people were doing evil in my name, I’d probably stop it … but that’s just me.

Seen just now on YouTube:

“God has a plan for you!” Okay, well, I have some notes for him.

Seen just now on Discord:

What are cats even trying to do?

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

You can’t tell me there’s anything better than earplugs; I simply will not hear it.

Going viral on WeChat:

Today’s book recommendation: “The Art of Silence” by the famous Chinese philosopher Shut-Up.

Just landed via X:

“You replied so quickly.” God forbid I wait like a dog to hear from you again.

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Activity Log ✨

Funny broken down quotes

New funny broken down quotes 👇

Just cleaned my room in case Beyoncé was somewhere close to my house and her car broke down, and she needed somewhere to sleep.

All funny broken down quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨