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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

The agony of thinking you’re finished doing the dishes, only to turn around and, to your horror, the pot.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

What, and I cannot stress this enough, day is it.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

Yeah, sex is cool, but have you ever crawled out of the worst depression of your life and got your spark back?

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

Ever think vampires just lied about hating garlic, now we’re just out here seasoning ourselves for them?

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

Woke up and immediately broke my resolution to be less sexy this year.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

The most difficult thing you’ll do as a parent is not rearrange the ornaments after the kids put them on the tree.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

If a girl sends you selfies and you don’t compliment her, she should be allowed to electrocute you.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

Good luck sending me mixed signals. Most the time I can’t even understand the direct ones.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

My hobby is misidentifying dinosaurs so my daughter can correct me.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

Yes, my sex drive is higher than my will to live, and what about it?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

508 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,101

Funny Quotes Topics

17,252

Funny Quotes Images

15,101

Updated

Dec 23, 2025

Users Online

3,679

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Instagram:

Maybe hot chocolate wants to be called beautiful chocolate at least one time.

Spotted on Threads:

Sometimes I miss the time when there was only one idiot per village.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

My future wife is probably fake laughing at her boyfriend’s lame jokes right now. Be patient, Queen, a true clown is on the way.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Every frozen pizza is a canvas that needs an artist’s touch.

Going viral on Slack:

What is that job called where you put the little stickers on fruit? I think I would be good at that.

Live now on TikTok:

I can feel your energy from two planets away.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Shorts should be half the price of pants.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Hobosexual. A person who dates you with the sole interest of having a place to stay.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I will never understand people’s fascination with their ancestry, isn’t knowing your current family bad enough.

Just shared via X:

Sometimes all you need is a Saturday to sleep, eat, and do absolutely nothing else all day.

Home » Funny Chronological Quotes

Funny chronological quotes

New funny chronological quotes 👇

Startup idea: Instagram, but it only shows you posts from people you follow, and they’re in chronological order.

0

2 months ago

chronological, chronological order, follow, follower, humor, idea, Instagram, media, only, order, people, post, posts, shows, social, social media, startup

All funny chronological quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

77 shares on Telegram this month:

I’d imagine the sound of clowns having sex would just be a cacophony of bicycle horns.

83 shares on WhatsApp this month:

They are all liars, so just pick the tallest and enjoy.

60 shares on Telegram this month:

So does everybody have a collection of grocery bags that you keep inside of a grocery bag?

63 shares on YouTube this month:

With all the fake information out there, I refuse to believe scales or mirrors.

95 shares on Threads this month:

“Can you explain the gap in your resume?” I went missing in a national park.

69 shares on YouTube this month:

First date idea: unlock and switch phones with the other person for exactly two minutes and if no one is horrified then the date continues.

50 shares on Reddit this month:

The feminine urge to open a coffee shop that’s also a library, a bakery, and a flower shop.

96 shares on Facebook this month:

No matter how sad their story is, don’t let anybody move into your house.

23 shares on Twitch this month:

9-5 is really 10-2 if you’re working remote.

16 shares on Threads this month:

All these years on the internet we have been working for artificial intelligence.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

Forget carrying me to bed; carry me to the end of the workweek. Then we can talk.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

People who live in glass houses shouldn’t change clothes.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

It doesn’t matter how bizarre your situation is. Somebody on Reddit already been there, done that.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

If I buy the circus, the monkey will be the manager.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Anyone know how to grow a money tree?

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

Dear liars, I hope every pair of pants you own are on fire.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

I want to be gangsta but my grandma said no.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

Did you ever buy a pack of underwear, take them out, and think, wow, these are huge… then try them on, and they fit perfectly?

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

I did some exercise in 2010, I should be good for another few years.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

Who needs dystopian fiction when you can watch the news?

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Slack:

I don’t rise and shine. I caffeinate and hope.

Going viral on YouTube:

My wife called to tell me she saw a fox on the way to work. I asked her how she knew it was on its way to work. She hung up on me.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

No matter how weird things seem to get, there’s always an episode of The Twilight Zone that was eerily similar.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

In an alternate universe, sex dreams of me.

Making waves on Snapchat:

It’s crazy people waste their time with hobbies and family when there are strangers on the internet who need to be argued with.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

You give a man your heart and he’s gonna put it under another girl’s picture.

Just landed via WeChat:

Vanilla perfumes are so nice. It’s like walking into a bakery but you are the bakery.

Going viral on Twitch:

Children will see a neatly hanging dish towel and be like oh hell no.

Going viral on Facebook:

Scams used to be like “free money!” and now they’re like “hello, we have a job for you”, which seems to be a bad sign.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

Funny chronological quotes

New funny chronological quotes 👇

Startup idea: Instagram, but it only shows you posts from people you follow, and they’re in chronological order.

All funny chronological quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨