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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

I’m not a fan of camping, if I wanted to sleep outside I wouldn’t pay my mortgage.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

I think the most financially irresponsible thing I’ve done is get my kids to like sushi.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

My ex had this fetish where he would dress up in his own clothes and act like an idiot.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

Celebrating President’s Day by not doing anything I promised I would.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

The first five days after the weekend are always the hardest.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

I hate when recipes tell you to take something out of the pan and add it back in later. No way bro. It’s staying in there.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has bookmarked:

Vegans will look you dead in the eye and tell you cauliflower tastes like ribs.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

Don’t forget to look directly into the sun for at least 10 minutes per day because that’s where all the vitamins are.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

I would like even faster food.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

Life is just resetting your password until you die.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

827 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,989

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,989

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,441

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

Need someone to feed me Doritos while I read, so I don’t mess up the pages. No weirdos.

Trending via X:

I get it, credit cards, I’ve reached my limit too.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Life would be so much easier if the nose of people who lie all the time did actually grow longer like Pinocchio’s.

Trending via Telegram:

Don’t argue with her. Just say “you remind me of my ex” then walk away.

Trending via Slack:

Got asked to be a godparent, proving God has lowered his recruitment standards.

Just landed via Facebook:

“Thug life,” I whisper to myself as I check out my sunglasses in the mirror.

Making waves on Facebook:

If you love a friend, let them go. If they come back with coffee, it was meant to be.

Just landed via Discord:

I put my pants on just like everybody else: when the police tell me to.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

A good way to get out of a conversation is to take off one of your socks and hand it to the person talking.

Shared recently on Slack:

Sometimes I’m just so exhausted I have to go to bed and scroll my phone for the next 2-3 hours.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

827 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,989

Funny Quotes Topics

13,933

Funny Quotes Images

10,989

Updated

4 minutes ago

Users Online

3,427

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

I held the door for an old person today and he was like, “didn’t we go to high school together” and we did.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

Hello pollen, my old friend, my nose is running once again.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

Twitter actually is my diary, so you’re not allowed to get mad at the things I post. You’re not even supposed to be reading this. Why were you going through my stuff?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

Anytime someone throws a Great Gatsby themed party, I have to assume they never finished the book.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

I’m bad at being sad. Three mins later, I’m making jokes about my situation.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

Flies are literally obsessed with flying into a room, then pretending they can’t get out. Grow up.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

Nobody ever talks about how Sodom and Gomorrah were walkable cities.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

I just need a day between everyday… to recover from the day before… just so I can prepare for the day coming.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

Imagine playing Truth or Dare and they dare you to go home.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has copied:

British people never go downstairs; they just jump out of a window and open an umbrella like Mary Poppins.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Threads:

The worst part about getting sucked up by the tornado you’re filming is to die knowing your wife was right. You are an idiot.

Breaking via YouTube:

Shout out to all you people out there who get asked if you’re okay a lot even though that’s the only facial expression you have.

Trending via Discord:

The world is my ostrich, or whatever.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Summer body? Folks, I’m cosplaying as a potato that’s seen some things.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Telling my boss I wasn’t drunk really backfired. I probably should have waited until he asked.

Just landed via Instagram:

At the end of the day, the day is going to end.

Going viral on Telegram:

Is there a bravery award I can nominate my son for as he managed to eat his toast despite the fact I cut it wrong.

Going viral on YouTube:

Food gives you energy to nap more.

Reported on WhatsApp:

Maybe hot chocolate wants to be called beautiful chocolate at least one time.

Going viral on WeChat:

I can keep my mouth shut, but you can read the subtitles on my face.

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