Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

I got bills. They’re multiplying.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

If I were to “picture everybody in the room naked,” I would be stunned and in awe of the beauty and diversity of the human form before me. But thanks for the advice.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

It’s so beautiful to see people just give up at work this time of year. I’m getting emails that do not include any complete sentences.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

My kids asked me what games I used to play on my iPad as a kid. I told them I used to speak into a fan to sound like a robot.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

Dance like nobody’s watching, except God, the NSA, and Santa Claus.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

The real miracle is how Jesus managed to book a table for twenty-six people on the night before the Easter holiday, and then only half them showed up.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

Girls take a picture of their legs in a bubble bath and say “guess where I am”. The library?

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

Why steal office supplies from work when you could take an extra-long bathroom break and steal company time instead?

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

I have never seen a sad person sliding down a water slide.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

If I’m too much for you, then go and find less.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

354 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,623

Funny Quotes Topics

17,675

Funny Quotes Images

15,623

Updated

Jan 12, 2026

Users Online

3,273

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Snapchat:

You will meet a girl who is very strange and a little bit evil. It’s really important that you don’t lose me.

Making waves on Threads:

Shorts should be half the price of pants.

Making waves on Slack:

Okay, this integrity isn’t going to compromise itself.

Shared recently on Slack:

“Stalking”. God forbid I have access to public information and know how to utilize my resources.

Going viral on WeChat:

Please don’t ask me what my hobbies are, I lost interest in life back in 6th grade.

Just landed via Telegram:

If I was an elephant, you’d all be sorry.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Live, laugh, lie to the doctor about how many drinks you have per week.

Just shared via YouTube:

I’m sorry I bit your hand when you reached for my popcorn.

Trending via WeChat:

He likes when I shakalaka, so, woop, there it is.

Making waves on WeChat:

Remember when we used to jump out of the swings? Those knees were fresh, fresh out the box.

Funny crunch quotes

Funny crunch quotes are here to spice up your snack time and brighten your day with a burst of laughter 🍿😄 Whether you’re munching on chips, popcorn, or your favorite crunchy treat, these witty lines will make every bite more entertaining 🎉🥨 Get ready to crunch, chuckle, and share the snack joy with friends—because life’s better with a little crispy humor! 😂✨

New funny crunch quotes 👇

All funny crunch quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

90 shares on Facebook this month:

The words I can’t wait to hear someday, “I’m sorry, Mom, you were right about everything.”

57 shares on Twitch this month:

No one watches your story faster than someone who doesn’t talk to you.

56 shares on Discord this month:

Imagine surviving Covid 19 and then China releases Covid 19S Plus Pro.

68 shares on Slack this month:

I am cutting contact with my 3-year-old narcissist nephew.

59 shares on Telegram this month:

Heard a recording of my own voice, and now I can never speak again.

32 shares on Discord this month:

I don’t want to brag but I found a recipe online, and then within three weeks not only made the recipe, but closed the tab on my browser.

32 shares on WeChat this month:

Taking my heart off my sleeve, I fold it up neatly and carefully place it back inside my chest.

66 shares on X this month:

If we hadn’t made them extinct, instead of Kung Fu Panda we could have had Tae Kwon Dodo.

60 shares on TikTok this month:

Don’t ring my doorbell unless you’re accompanied by a camera crew and holding balloons and a big check.

48 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I realized being an adult is just feeling too tired to function, and then functioning.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I think the Monday after Sunday should always be a day off.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Taking a Hooters waitress on a date to a different Hooters on her night off.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes a girl has to delete all the apps on her phone and not speak to anyone for a week to find true happiness.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m at that age where I can no longer refer to other people as “elderly.”

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m sorry I bit your hand when you reached for my popcorn.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

If you were a dinosaur, you’d be a Gorgeousaurus.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Sitting in an antique chair is weird, like this thing has seen so many butts.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Womansplaining is when a woman tries to explain to you what you’re thinking/feeling, and is just totally 100% wrong.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

There is a giant spider on my dash so I’m going to have to buy a new car now.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m a work in progress that hasn’t made much progress.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

354 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,623

Funny Quotes Topics

17,675

Funny Quotes Images

15,623

Updated

Jan 12, 2026

Users Online

3,365

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

My head is starting to get dented from hitting rock bottom so often.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

The local casino is hosting a speed dating event. Just what every woman needs, a new boyfriend with a gambling problem.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has viewed:

Today, I changed a light bulb and walked into a bar. My life is a joke.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

I want to clarify that what I publish on social media does not define me as a person; I am worse.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

I would like to unsubscribe from all responsibilities, please and thank you.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

Wishing all the contacts in my phone “Merry Christmas, I hope you get what you deserve” and just letting that work itself out.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

Welcome to your 50’s; you can have a really good laugh at everyone moaning about their aches and pains in their 30’s.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

Can’t believe we stayed up and screamed “Happy New Year” for this shit.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

The 10 minutes I spend on my mobile before I go to sleep are the best 3 hours of my day.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

My cats won’t talk to me because I came home late from work.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Slack:

You can always tell when a man is dating someone new. Why you going to the aquarium and the museum?

Going bananas on Pinterest:

The sexual tension between me and a late afternoon coffee to get me through the workday.

Spotted on Twitch:

Starting conversations with short people by saying “back when I was your height…”

Spotted on Slack:

As a man, it’s my job to mistake kindness for flirting.

Going viral on Facebook:

We should be able take jets and tanks and stuff whenever we want, we paid for them.

Freshly posted on Threads:

If you collect the crumbs from one Nature Valley granola bar, you can make three more granola bars.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I’ve heard that people who don’t have Facebook use their free time to lie naked on top of each other. Ew, imagine that.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I eat cake every day because somewhere out there it’s someone’s birthday and I like to celebrate.

Going viral on Discord:

Things can feel really overwhelming. Sometimes days or even weeks can get really hectic. Don’t forget that life is all about getting as much phone time as possible. Never lose sight of that.

Shared recently on Telegram:

If they cancel the Simpsons, we will no longer be able to see into the future.

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