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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

I can’t watch Sex and the City anymore, because I get really upset at how much money these ladies have.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

I put my pants on like everyone else. With hope they still fit.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

D was probably like “lmao ok” when they named the alphabet the ABCs

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

What’s a good career for people with no motivation or talent?

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

Every day, a new coworker asks if you’ve used ChatGPT, and the conversation doesn’t end if you say “No.”

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

Am I finishing my education or is my education finishing me?

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

My favorite thing to do is nothing, with no one.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

I have decided to purchase the grocery store because it is now cheaper than the groceries inside it.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

She’s got style. She’s got grace. She dropped her cellphone on her face. She’s a lady.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

My knight in shining armor comes in liquid form.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,491

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

I had a Russian Uber driver the other day. His name was Pikup Andropov.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

How are they running out of oxygen if they’re breathing it right back into the submarine?

Going bananas on X:

I only go on LinkedIn to see what my coworkers looked like 15 years ago.

Trending via Discord:

If anyone needs me, I’ll be in this whirlpool of emotions over there.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Hosting Thanksgiving? Bring up politics so everyone will leave early.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Blocking someone isn’t enough; I need their PornHub videos to always buffer, just as they’re about to climax.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Relationships: Because sometimes destroying your life is a two person job.

Trending via Snapchat:

A garlic a day keeps the doctor away.

Trending via Messenger:

One big difference between men and women is that if a woman says “Smell this,” it usually smells nice.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I bet the person who named the fireplace also named the waterfall.

Funny embarrass quotes

Funny embarrass quotes are the perfect way to laugh off those cringe-worthy moments we all experience 🙈😂! Whether you’ve tripped in public or sent a message to the wrong person, these hilarious gems remind us that awkwardness is just part of the fun 🎉😅. Get ready to smile, cringe, and maybe even relate as we dive into the world of epic facepalm moments and witty comebacks! 🤪📱

New funny embarrass quotes 👇

All funny embarrass quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

82 shares on Threads this month:

Welcome to the internet, where people are confidently wrong all the time.

34 shares on WeChat this month:

I read all your bumper stickers and now we’re both stupid.

46 shares on Snapchat this month:

Next time I feel butterflies, I’m chugging down a bottle of tequila so they drown.

97 shares on WeChat this month:

At the art museum walking slower and observing more than anyone else.

11 shares on Telegram this month:

Lazy Rule: Can’t reach it, don’t need it.

23 shares on Messenger this month:

Okay, new plan, I’m going to marry a Kardashian.

21 shares on Facebook this month:

The only thing I gained so far this year is weight.

78 shares on YouTube this month:

Cool things happen when you start hanging out outside a lot. Animals just appear and stuff.

90 shares on Threads this month:

My five-year plan is to just see what happens.

14 shares on Telegram this month:

Is it just my dad, or do all fathers watch videos on their phones with the volume full blast, with no concern for anyone else in the house?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Due to unforeskin circumcistances …

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Long sandwiches should have suitcase handles.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Money will not leave you on read for 9 hours.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

When someone asks me what my dream job is, it’s just like “I don’t know dude, I don’t dream about jobs”

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Warning: This movie contains “Adult Themes” such as interest rates, bad knees, back pain, and excitement about going to bed early.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Being an adult is mumbling ‘this is stupid’ as you reluctantly slide out of bed.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I love when really expensive products say, “apply generously,” like, of course, you would say that.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

“Alcohol and beautiful women” is apparently not an appropriate answer when you are asked about your weaknesses in a job interview.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s hard dating someone who has been single for a long time. Any slight inconvenience, and they’ll crawl back into their peaceful abode. No stress.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

A fun thing to do on a first date is wear a wedding dress.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,510

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

People my age are on baby #2, and I’m on drink #5.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

Me (seductively looking at a potato): would mash.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

The male urge to tell you what business used to be located there back in his day.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

That moment when it’s January in a couple of weeks, and you realize you are still trying to lose weight from last January.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

Caught my husband staring at me again. He’s probably weighing his pros and cons.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

Walmart was wild as hell today, so I fit right in.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

My soulmate is chocolate cake.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

Going out to eat and shopping by yourself is actually one of the most peaceful and therapeutic things ever.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

I miss my Dad opening the windows and talking about cross-ventilation.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

If sex was strictly meant for procreation, why did God make it feel so good?

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Threads:

ChatGPT, what do you do when you find out your boyfriend’s been using ChatGPT to write you messages?

Making waves on Facebook:

I have a question and my question is, how can I look so cute in the mirror but like such a baked potato in pictures?

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I will marry a tall, masculine, lovey-dovey man who can’t breathe when I ignore his existence.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I will always be hotter than everyone who hates me.

Just shared via Facebook:

Being sexy is just the cherry on top. I’m actually a genius and the sweetest girl ever.

Just shared via Threads:

Carrying a pizza in public feels like you’re showing off.

Trending via Discord:

Hired a financial advisor, and his first piece of advice was that I don’t make nearly enough money to justify paying a financial advisor.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I suffer from that syndrome where your neutral expression makes it look like you’re an angry serial killer.

Breaking via Pinterest:

Hey there, Delilah, what’s it like in new orc city?

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Sometimes I have to remind myself to put down my iPhone, go outside, and judge people in person.

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