Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇾 has viewed:

Studies show people who like my posts are happier, smarter, and better looking than those who don’t.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

Be a pineapple: stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet on the inside.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

Sometimes people come into your life — and they need to stop doing that.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

I put my pants on like everyone else. With hope they still fit.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

Why’d they call it a fly swatter and not a splatula?

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

I wish I loved exercise as much as I love napping 3 times a day and eating 5 times the suggested serving size.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

Friends with benefits but the benefits are you getting me an internship with your father’s network.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

Don’t worry password, I’m insecure too.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Never eat more than you can lift.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

“Is there anything else I can assist you with today?” No, just that one thing you couldn’t assist me with, thanks.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,464

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Snapchat:

I want him in ways that are deeply deeply upsetting to modern feminism.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I’ve been blocked, unfollowed, and unfriended, but I’ve never been told I’m bad in bed.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Scooby Doo was a woke-ass show. Every villain was just a landlord trying to scare people off their property so they could sell it.

Live now on YouTube:

I think my dog always follows me to the bathroom because I always follow him outside and he thinks that’s the way it works.

Going viral on Reddit:

I’ve learned a lot over the years, but the best advice I can ever give someone is never buy a used harmonica.

Going viral on YouTube:

It’s hard dating someone who has been single for a long time. Any slight inconvenience, and they’ll crawl back into their peaceful abode. No stress.

Just shared via Slack:

Me: what can possibly go wrong though. Anxiety: I’m glad you asked.

Live now on Twitch:

I’m not crazy, I’m just mentally spicy.

Spotted on Messenger:

Nothing betrays your age more than the slang you refuse to let go of.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

I always thought that aunts had a lot of money. Until I became one myself.

Funny hopeless quotes

Funny hopeless quotes bring a hilarious twist to those moments when life feels a little… well, hopeless 🙃. They turn frustration into laughter 😂 and remind us that sometimes, the best way to cope is with a good chuckle 🤪. Perfect for sharing with friends or brightening your day, these witty gems prove that even in the toughest times, humor is the ultimate superpower 💥✨!

New funny hopeless quotes 👇

All funny hopeless quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

45 shares on X this month:

I’m officially at the age where I understand why my parents never wanted to go anywhere after work.

20 shares on Snapchat this month:

That moment when you cut into a seedless watermelon and find out it’s only allegedly seedless.

58 shares on Twitch this month:

I logged on to Amazon and they said that they have run out of things that I don’t need.

33 shares on Instagram this month:

Spent most of the day making sure my couch still works. So far so good.

98 shares on X this month:

Diet Coke is just a fridge cigarette.

23 shares on YouTube this month:

I stay away from beef-flavored cat food. At no point could Sylvia realistically bring down a cow, and I don’t need that kind of ego in the house.

20 shares on Twitch this month:

If you knock down a policeman, they’ll get backup.

45 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Sometimes I do something completely out of character, like say no to a slice of pizza, or trust someone.

59 shares on Reddit this month:

It’s a good thing Titanic is only a movie. A lot of people would’ve died.

20 shares on WeChat this month:

The quickest way for a parent to get a child’s attention is to sit down and look comfortable.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

If the first thing you do in the morning is checking your emails, you’re starting your day with other people’s problems.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to my very loose interpretation of ‘functioning adult’.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I waste a lot of time putting my phone down to just pick it back up again.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

The money I made gradually, you need urgently?

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Entered this world crying, and honestly, not much has changed.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Unpopular Opinion: Die Hard is a Harry Potter movie. He sneaks around a tower at night avoiding Alan Rickman.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Dating apps? No thanks, if I wanted to talk to someone for hours and accomplish nothing, I’d contact tech support.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Girls want a bad boy to fix. Boys want a good girl to corrupt. Me? I just want a rumbustious monkey as a butler.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Feeling like Floyd in this May weather (illiterate and violent).

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Who decided that skeletons are scary? Because honestly, I’d be more scared if the muscular system suddenly walked into my room.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,659

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

Me going to work because I’m too honest to scam people, too shy to be an influencer, too good for a sugar daddy, and too dumb for crypto.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

If Keith Richards survived the ’70s, the ’80s, and 1.2 million Marlboros, I can probably survive anything.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

I’m glad cars were invented. Imagine riding a horse at 3 a.m., coming back from the club.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

Relationship status: I’m the only one wearing my hoodies.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

The only ‘survival horror’ game I play is called ‘getting up every day and leaving the house.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

I tell people I rearrange my furniture to change things up, but we all know it’s to annoy my husband.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

May your life one day be as beautiful as you portray it on social media.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

I’ve decided to give people an attitude instead of gifts this year.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

Animals are 15 minutes old and already know what to do.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Gravity called. It’s sick of holding me up.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

My life is simple, I see a queue of more than 6 people, I go home.

Breaking via Slack:

I don’t hate you, but I hope you run out of hot water before you’re finished your shower.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

My savings account has been empty for so long that a Spirit Halloween just opened up inside it.

Spotted on YouTube:

Senility is the pits. Spent an hour driving around the mall parking lot looking for my car.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

If I delete a tweet, I should disappear with it.

Breaking via Twitch:

I don’t know which aunty needs to hear this, but focus on your own child.

Trending via WeChat:

Just spoke to my wife while the internet was down. She seems nice. She’s a nurse apparently.

Going viral on YouTube:

My toxic trait is that I give my friends mental health advice when I belong in an asylum.

Live now on WhatsApp:

I take issue with furniture that deliberately moves 1 inch when you’re in a rush to get by.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Someone needs to make an app for a Tamagotchi that you keep alive by going offline.

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