Commentary:
Who knew hot dogs had a secret rap name? 🌭🎤 Please, let's not turn them into urban legends. 😂
625 Funny know quotes
Somebody somewhere today don’t know it’s their last day with all 10 fingers.
Commentary:
Oops! Someone's about to join the 9-finger club. 🎉✋🤚
I’m so jealous of people who know how to shut up. I shut up, and subtitles come out my face.
Commentary:
Sounds like you’ve got a built-in commentary feature! 😂🤐🎬
If my house is clean, just know I yelled at everyone for two hours first.
Commentary:
Cleaning tip: Achieve a spotless house with the power of your vocal cords! 🗣️🏠✨
No wine. No peace. Know wine. Know peace.
Commentary:
When grapes become grape-ful, everything falls into place 🍇🍷✌️
No one lies more than a parent who says, “We’ll see.” You know we’re not seeing anything.
Commentary:
" 'We'll see' is just parental code for 'Not a chance!' 😂👀🚫"
Cocktails can be tricky, because they taste like juice, but then the next thing you know… you can’t walk.
Commentary:
Juice: *tastes great, but forgot to mention it's moonwalking practice in a glass* 🍹🕺😂
Fun fact: Did you know that removing junk food from your diet can help you lose up to 90% of your will to live?
Commentary:
Trying to give up junk food is like trying to break up with the love of your life 🍔🍕💔😅
I know breakfastless behavior when I see it.
Commentary:
Sounds like someone's running on coffee fumes and dreams of pancakes! 🥞😴☕
You know it’s bad when people start telling you that you are the strongest person they’ve ever met.
Commentary:
Looks like I've leveled up to boss mode! When did life become an extreme sport? 🏋️♂️💪🤣