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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

When people talk about enriching their lives, I assume they’ve found a way to add more cheese.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Have you fallen in love with me yet, or do I need to post more nonsense?

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

I welcome change as long as nothing is altered or different than before.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

It is kind of inspiring that I messed up my life without drugs, gambling or a troubled youth. People really can do anything.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

I feel like whoever named them rice cakes has never actually eaten a cake.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

I’ve started ripping my shirt in half like Hulk Hogan when I mean business. Long story short, I’m looking for a new job.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

If you have an old house, but you haven’t got a ghost, you should complain to the estate agent.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Does refusing to go to the gym count as resistance training?

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

I don’t need alcohol to make bad decisions.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

Don’t rush me, I’m still deciding whether I’ll be productive or not today!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1832 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,994

Funny Quotes Topics

14,796

Funny Quotes Images

11,994

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,427

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Twitch:

Your favorite little ball of silliness has logged in.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Why did they call it K-pop and not Seoul music?

Just landed via Messenger:

Not the sharpest cheddar on the charcuterie board.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Sports are better when you have hate in your heart.

Going viral on Facebook:

l identify as a Christmas tree. Lit on the outside, dead on the inside.

Just landed via Facebook:

Whenever I get up my cat gets up too and then yells at me like it’s my fault she decided we have to do this together.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Body: Time to sleep. Brain: Hey, that’s an interesting thought, here’s six billion more.

Shared recently on Twitch:

A couple of years ago, the internet was an escape from the real world. Today, the real world is an escape from the internet.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Children are so giving. For example, my kids gave me a cold.

Trending via YouTube:

She is both the storm and the shelter.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1832 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,994

Funny Quotes Topics

14,796

Funny Quotes Images

11,994

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,447

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Even Hotmail is hotter than me.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

I need to get my shit together, but at this point, I’m waiting to see if the world is going to end before I put any real effort in.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

Never trust people who smile constantly. They’re either selling something or not very bright.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Don’t date coworkers. Being the hot coworker nobody at work has a chance with is always the best role to play.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

If at first you don’t succeed, it’s only attempted murder.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Sneaking up behind people and marrying them.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has shared:

Stretching my back isn’t enough; I need to take out my spine and wring it out like a towel.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

Nobody at this train station knows that there’s a hole in my sock.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

They should invent something in between coffee and narcotics.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

I was dismayed to hear the story of Rumpelstiltskin. I had no idea he was like that outside of work.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

Roses are red, violets are blue, sunflowers are yellow. I bet you were expecting something romantic, but no, this is just gardening facts.

Shared recently on TikTok:

When someone asks me why I’m leaving the party early, I say “I’m late for an appointment with my pajamas.”

Going viral on Reddit:

Elections make you feel like we’re all in divorce court waiting to see who gets custody of us.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Welcome to middle age: your chin looks lonely; here’s another one.

Seen just now on Slack:

How long past date can I eat eggs? Like are they still good or am I naming them now?

Just landed via Slack:

If you can’t handle me while I’m broke, then you don’t deserve me when I have $600.

Spotted on TikTok:

Does your blood pump that way just for me?

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Womansplaining is when a woman tries to explain to you what you’re thinking/feeling, and is just totally 100% wrong.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Spotify should have helpful mental health suggestions like “your top listens are Taylor Swift and true crime, go to therapy.”

Making waves on WeChat:

People who scream sneeze need their own island.

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