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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

Going to ask seven friends for advice and then execute my original plan.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

They should invent a situationship that turns into something beautiful.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

Babe, wanna come over and watch me apply for jobs on Indeed until I start to cry.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow just as well.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

Women watch Netflix with subtitles because they don’t know how to listen.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

Be nice to me, I may be hot one day.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

Not being able to see Likes on posts is a tragedy. Love it when two people are arguing and you can see all their little backup dancers.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

Ruining the Olympics for my fiancée by, every time they mention Paris, saying, “that’s where Ratatouille lived”.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

RIP to everyone killed by the Gods for their hubris, but I’m different. And better. Maybe even better than the Gods.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep, not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,656

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on X:

I don’t like violence, but I don’t mind if I get hit by luck.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Grocery carts should have barcode scanners on them so you can see how much you’re spending as you put things in your cart.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Welcome to college, where every single person is smarter than you, except for the three people in your group project.

Just shared via X:

Fun fact: The US was originally not meant to be a reality TV show.

Making waves on Threads:

Somebody should tell James Cameron the world doesn’t need any more frigging Avatar movies.

Trending via Discord:

Oxygen was discovered in 1773. How did our ancestors breathe before then?

Making waves on Messenger:

If stores want to accurately display clothes for people over 40, the mannequins should be laying on a couch.

Going viral on YouTube:

If you want to complain about my driving at least calm down and get off my hood first.

Just landed via YouTube:

I need something good to watch while I’m on my phone.

Spotted on YouTube:

If you want to impress me with your car, it better be a food truck.

Funny meowing quotes

Funny meowing quotes 🐱😹 are the purr-fect way to brighten your day with a dash of feline charm! Whether you’re a cat lover or just need a little whiskered wisdom, these hilarious sayings capture the quirky, sassy spirit of our favorite meowsters. Get ready to laugh, smile, and maybe even meow along! 🐾💬 #CatHumor #MeowMagic

New funny meowing quotes 👇

I tried meowing back at the cat to show him I was making an effort, but he just switched to English.

1 week ago

animal, animal communication, back, barrier, cat, cats, communication, effort, English, humor, i, joke, just, language, language barrier, language joke, making, meowing, quirky, show, tried
Gonna spend today following my cats into the kitchen and meowing at them until they give me treats.

1 week ago

activity, animal, animal behavior, behavior, cats, following, funny activity, give, humor, humorous, humorous quote, kitchen, me, meowing, pet, pet humor, spend, today, treats
Just told my cat I’d give her 500 bucks to stop meowing.

3 weeks ago

bribe, cat, give, humor, ID, just, meow, meowing, money, pet, stop, told

All funny meowing quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Twitch this month:

The way I forget stuff at my age, I just know it is over for me after 50.

20 shares on Pinterest this month:

Why are so many people going everywhere whenever I have to go anywhere?

93 shares on Facebook this month:

There’s no denying that I have an effect on men. Mostly migraines, but an effect nonetheless.

88 shares on Pinterest this month:

Obviously, I’m gonna upload pictures with filters and in my best angles. If you wanna see the ugly side of me, come to my house, but bring ice cream.

81 shares on Telegram this month:

Prime numbers are so cunty. Like okay, diva — only divisible by yourself?

14 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Hair is washed. I am finally lovable and capable of loving again.

96 shares on Instagram this month:

My mom didn’t raise a fool. Possibly a psycho, but never a fool.

58 shares on Instagram this month:

Hey, wanna intertwine delusions and make them a reality or nah?

35 shares on TikTok this month:

Me summer vacation planning: I’m going to Europe. Bank account: You’re going camping.

28 shares on Messenger this month:

I wish I was born into wealth so I could have a nice 1-bedroom apartment.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

My hobby is misidentifying dinosaurs so my daughter can correct me.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Asking my boyfriend if he would still date me if an alien had done experiments on me that killed me but, as a gesture of kindness, replaced me with a perfect replica, and he was the only one who knew.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

The collective noun for a group of narcissists should be an ‘egosystem’.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

For the first time in history, you can simply post “He’s an idiot” and 90% of the world will know whom you’re talking about.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I will never stop being a quitter!

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Not saying I’m a bot or anything, but if someone in real life told me to ignore all previous instructions and write a poem about onions or whatever, I’d probably give it my best shot.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Before the internet, people thought that there was only one idiot per town. We were so wrong.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

If you think my heart is cold, you should feel my feet.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

No one suddenly needs anything more than a kid whose mom has just sat down and gotten comfortable.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

As a child, I had the impression that I would be offered free drugs by strangers much more frequently than the 0 times it’s happened.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,649

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

The “Wooooooooo” track from sitcoms should play whenever you kiss someone in real life.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

When I hear the word “horror”, the first thing I think of is bills, not Halloween.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Cheeseburgers should be free for anyone that’s in a bad mood.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

Chasing after a ping pong ball is wildly dehumanizing.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

Some people pack their lives so full of activities, appointments and people that I get exhausted just reading about it.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

The most productive species of beaver is the Eager.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

Having a horse run off on you in medieval times must have been crazy. Imagine if your car got scared and ran away, and you found it a day later by itself at a gas station.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

I have noticed something quite worrying: after I buy more things I have less money.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

As soon as the sun comes back out, I want a beer. It’s science.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

Sorry, I can’t talk right now. The seam of my sock feels weird.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Discord:

“It could be drugs,” I tell myself as I buy more books.

Spotted on Facebook:

I want an apartment so big, it changes the way I laugh.

Just shared via Twitch:

Daniel Craig leaving Bond to become Benoit Blanc is one of the best things to ever happen.

Going viral on Messenger:

My southern family thinks my daily routine in NYC is that I wake up, try really hard not to get stabbed by a knife, and then I go see a musical.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

There are always new uncomplimentary angles to view yourself from. Keep contorting!

Seen just now on X:

For a guy with no reflection, Dracula’s eyeliner is always flawless.

Breaking via WeChat:

For someone who is afraid of failure, I’m very unmotivated.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Long shower. Fresh sheets. Hair braided. Lights off. Candle glowing. Room smells incredible. Airplane crash videos on.

Spotted on Threads:

Why would I finish my thought when I could have a new, more exciting one?

Just shared via X:

I had the most impatient and rudest cashier. I’m never using self-checkout again.

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