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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

Fall in love? I can barely fall asleep.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

Gwyneth Paltrow, I received the message you sent me last night in my dream and will proceed with the plan.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

Jesus Christ. I haven’t seen a meltdown like that since Chernobyl.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

Having no one to talk would get you a good sleeping schedule.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

I’m pretty sure I fall under the percentage of people who’ve eaten the sticker on the apple.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has bookmarked:

Welcome to your 50s… you can now fall asleep sitting up on the couch at any given moment.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

The night is dark and full of terrors. My day is long and full of meetings. Same thing.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

How do I un-know people?

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

What pushes you to watch 19 seasons of people in a hospital?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

Some people can’t sleep because they have insomnia. I can’t sleep because I have Internet.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,513

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Discord:

A Monday every week is excessive.

Spotted on Threads:

You wish you had this many chins.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Cats clean themselves with their little fish breath mouths, but somehow they always smell like laundry detergent, vanilla, and happiness.

Just landed via Threads:

Guy who normally applauds when the plane lands right before the pilot crashes it: “Boo!”

Going viral on Threads:

My chess strategy is eating one of your pieces every time you look away.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Call me constipated the way I don’t give a shit.

Breaking via Snapchat:

My morning routine includes 10 minutes of sitting on my bed and thinking about how tired I am.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Girlfriend is temporary, ex-girlfriend is forever.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Have you ever been in the car with someone who drives like we got extra lives?

Trending via Discord:

A person that weights 200 pounds on Earth weighs 76 pounds on Mars. So I’m not overweight, I’m on the wrong planet.

Funny milestones quotes

Funny milestones quotes bring a burst of laughter 🎉 to every achievement, turning big moments into unforgettable memories 😂. Whether you’re celebrating birthdays, work wins, or quirky life events, these witty lines add sparkle ✨ and smiles 😄 to your special day. Ready to toast with humor and heart? Let’s dive into the funniest ways to mark those unforgettable milestones! 🎈🎊

New funny milestones quotes 👇

All funny milestones quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

56 shares on Reddit this month:

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the holiday traffic I said I’d avoid even though I did nothing to avoid it.

23 shares on Facebook this month:

Having a mom who cooks good food is such a big flex.

18 shares on Discord this month:

It’s called a Caesar Salad because you stab it a bunch of times when you eat it.

31 shares on Slack this month:

How many jokes about lightbulbs does it take to change us?

84 shares on Threads this month:

To be blocked is to be seen and to be seen is to be loved.

68 shares on Pinterest this month:

I travel like I’m rich, then eat like I’m broke.

86 shares on Messenger this month:

People will scroll on their phones for 6 hours a day and wonder how other people can watch a movie every day.

89 shares on YouTube this month:

Just did a seductive hair flip and an onion ring flew out.

71 shares on Telegram this month:

The lion does not concern himself with the check engine light.

12 shares on WeChat this month:

I have a condition where if I don’t walk as fast as humanly possible wherever I go, I will die. I’m like the bus in Speed.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m chronically online in a different and more sophisticated way than you are.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve got 50 minutes to make it look like I’ve been flossing for the last 6 months.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

No camera can do justice to a landscape that melts your heart.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Not being able to teleport is a huge inconvenience for me.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Vote for me and I will halve the calories in chocolate.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

The older I get, the more I realize how much I love being at home, doing nothing.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Waffles are just pancakes with convenient boxes to hold your syrup.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

When you have intense chemistry with someone, everyone else feels so bleh.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Eating dark chocolate is practically eating vegetables.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s all fun and games until you send the clapping emoji instead of the prayer hands when commenting on the news of a death in the family.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,740

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

My children are very helpful. For example, when I ask them to do something, they suggest a different child that could do it instead.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

At the end of the day, the day is going to end.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

All these deadlines, but it’s you I want to meet.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

I heard you like bad boys. Well, I’m bad. At everything.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

I’m currently on a really effective diet called “I only have twenty dollars until payday”.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

Signatures are so unserious, just “pinky promise” for adults. Write your name in a silly little way on this very important piece of paper so we that we can send you to jail if you do anything wrong.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

Every Jurassic Park movie should end with an insurance adjuster getting a phone call and immediately throwing up.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

Thinking about writing my own eulogy because I don’t want my loved ones to say I’m a control freak.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

There is sex without love, there is love without sex, and there is me without both.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

I hate when people ask me: “Why are you so quiet?” Because I am. That’s how I function. I don’t ask others, “Why do you talk so much?” It’s rude.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via YouTube:

I’d rather be spotted in a strip club than a Subway.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Remember when Mustangs were muscle cars and not an embarrassment to the name.

Live now on Snapchat:

Life sucks a lot less when your feet are in a creek, and you forgot your phone in the truck.

Just shared via X:

Yes, I’m full of microplastics, but it’s actually been helpful. It’s given me superpowers. I can communicate with Tupperware.

Making waves on WeChat:

One minute you’re young and fun, the next you’re excited about a new vacuum cleaner.

Going bananas on LinkedIn:

Being famous on social media is like being rich in Monopoly. It’s not real, so calm down.

Spotted on Discord:

Bring me a higher love. You have 24 hours. No cops.

Going viral on Reddit:

My mental health is as reliable as a flashlight in a horror film.

Making waves on X:

This summer went by so fast, I didn’t even get a chance to lose any weight.

Just shared via Messenger:

He died doing what he loved: trying to find out if gang members are ticklish.

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