Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

Like many men my age, my biggest regret is hiring the inexpensive hitman.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Due to intense brain fog all of my thoughts have been grounded until further notice.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

I don’t know which is worse, people stealing your jokes or people not stealing your jokes.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

My muffin top has become a full blown birthday cake.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has copied:

You can mess up big time letting someone know you have a printer.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has downloaded:

I’m too tired to shower. Anyone want to wash my back?

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

I’ve just filed a restraining order against reality.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

Having to write cover letters is so dumb. Do you really believe my dream ever since I was a little girl was to work for you? No. It was to ride a pony on a funky space rainbow. Grow up.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

Asking people their favorite color and then calling them liars.