Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

If cartoons have taught us anything, it’s the uselessness of little umbrellas when plummeting from a cliff.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

They say “Time heals.” No, it doesn’t. I’m still mad.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

For Halloween I will go to the beach dressed as a french fry and let the seagulls destroy me.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

I’ve been following this strict diet all week and so far all I’ve lost is my patience.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Salted, and I cannot stress this enough, butter.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

Long-distance couples be like, “I can’t wait,” and then they wait.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

In my years of experience, people who disagree with me are usually wrong.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

One of the great joys in this life is looking at your pet’s weird little teeth.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

Any fool can criticize, condemn and complain, and most do.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

I knew the date was going well when we shared a glass of gravy with two straws.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Jan 20, 2026

3,598

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on TikTok:

Becoming a man doesn’t happen the first time you fight or make love. It happens the first time you see the gas bill and remind everyone that we aren’t trying to heat the outside.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

Probably the most empowered I’ve ever felt was that time I stuck a fork in a socket.

Trending via Discord:

I always cook with wine. Sometimes I even add it to the food.

Seen just now on Telegram:

They monitor me harder than Britney Spears around here.

Broadcasted on Discord:

My wife screamed “you haven’t listened to a single word I’ve said, have you?!” I was taken aback, what a weird way to start a conversation.

Just landed via Twitch:

Being awake is the worst.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Even my imaginary friend got bored and left me a note saying ‘we should see other people’

Going viral on Snapchat:

They say we learn from our mistakes. That’s why I’m making as many as possible… I’ll be a genius soon.

Making waves on Messenger:

You ever want someone so bad it pisses you off a little.

Shared recently on TikTok:

David Attenborough narrating my life: “He’s still sleeping.”

Funny omelette quotes

Funny omelette quotes bring humor to the breakfast table with clever takes on this eggy classic. 🍳😂 From playful jabs at flipping mishaps to witty remarks about egg preferences, these quotes serve up a light-hearted look at the art of making an omelette. Get ready to crack a smile with these breakfast-inspired laughs! 🍳😂

New funny omelette quotes 👇

A frittata is just an omelette for people too lazy to flip things.

2 months ago

breakfast, cooking, food, frittata, humor, just, lazy, omelette, people, simplicity, things
I’m just going to flip this omelette… Okay, we’re having scrambled eggs.

3 months ago

cooking, egg, eggs, fail, flip, food, food fail, going, humor, just, kitchen, kitchen mishap, mishap, okay, omelette, scrambled, scrambled egg

All funny omelette quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

100 shares on Messenger this month:

In a parallel universe, Mariah Carey is doing her shopping and is sick of hearing me on every store’s speaker system.

27 shares on YouTube this month:

You can name literally any food or drink to the dentist and they’ll be like “ohhh, that’s actually so bad for your teeth. You should only eat water and toothpaste.”

81 shares on Pinterest this month:

I just start doing the Macarena when I want to end conversations now.

47 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m opening a secret ice cream club called The Inside Scoop.

100 shares on Snapchat this month:

I trust an insult more than I do a compliment.

36 shares on YouTube this month:

One of the most embarrassing things in the world: walking downhill.

28 shares on Telegram this month:

Lawyers should get walk-up songs in court like how wrestlers do.

37 shares on X this month:

The belief that software engineers are uniquely intelligent has done unimaginable damage on society.

11 shares on Telegram this month:

I feel like a large portion of my adult life has been looking for an adult to do my adulting.

70 shares on Pinterest this month:

I am absolutely delicious, and I hate how mosquitoes know it.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Seeing an animal sigh is so funny to me. Like, what happened, buddy?

14 folks are currently checking 👀

“I should’ve peed before I left,” will be my epitaph.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Just when you’ve built some confidence that you’re a smarter than average human, universe sends you captcha.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

My cat runs a secret cult. I just pay the rent.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Cafeteria is a beautiful name for a baby girl.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

The universe clearly isn’t working as it should so someone should turn it off and back on again.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

You can’t have a bad day at work if you don’t go.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

The trouble with living alone is that it’s always my turn to do the dishes.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Job hunting has legitimately been the most demoralizing experience of my life. Nothing else will make you realize how little you can actually do.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

If you’re looking for a quiet place to talk to yourself, my DMs are open.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,641

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

The older I get, the more I understand why witches lived alone in the woods.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

Vaping: When you feel like smoking but don’t want to look cool.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

I get it, sauce, I also thicken over time.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has copied:

It sucks that crazy people ruined wearing tinfoil hats for those of us that just did it for fashion purposes.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

I always fear that one day I will enter my house and find a thief, knocked out unconscious by the things fallen on his head from some closet.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

Eating trail mix should count as hiking.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

If this meeting were any slower, it’d be a landscape painting.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

Your soulmate wouldn’t do you like that, by the way.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

Dating is just wondering why someone is single and then slowly figuring it out.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

Wake up, there’s overthinking to be done.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Telegram:

When your parents are on a call and they ask for a pen, man, that pressure is real.

Making waves on WeChat:

Is anyone else really scared for how stupid and illiterate the next generations are gonna be?

Making waves on Slack:

If a zombie and vampire bite each other, who turns who?

Trending via Snapchat:

They should release the Epstein list right before the Oscars.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Vacations are expensive, but how else could you put a price tag on your kids being ungrateful in a different city.

Shared recently on Discord:

I am simply too intelligent to be happy.

Just shared via Telegram:

It was a complicated 17-hour surgery, but they finally managed to separate the art from the artist.

Spotted on Telegram:

I didn’t buy that thing I wanted but didn’t need, so I celebrated by buying a different thing I wanted but didn’t need.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Me, having zero balance in my account, viewing houses worth 10 million, and being like, “No, I don’t like the kitchen.”

Trending via Pinterest:

Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off.

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