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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

“Do you like the Microsoft Teams app?” Does Sisyphus like his boulder?

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

If my calculator had a history, it would be more embarrassing than my browser history.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

Interesting people are my favorite endangered species.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

I’m not superstitious because it brings bad luck.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

“Are you busy tomorrow?” That entirely depends on what you need me to do.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

Hello darkness, my old friend. Why are you here? It’s 6:00 pm.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

Hate how quietly iPhones die. At 5% it should start verbally begging for its life.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

Most people in your life will come and go but occasionally you’ll meet someone really special who makes you contemplate murder.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

Let me help you turn that software into hardware.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2266 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,428

Funny Quotes Topics

15,132

Funny Quotes Images

12,428

Updated

40 minutes ago

Users Online

3,450

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Telegram:

If you think nobody cares about you, try missing a couple of payments.

Reported on WeChat:

If Monday were available for purchase at IKEA, it would be called “Fekking Hell”.

Reported on LinkedIn:

Forgot how fun it is to post IG stories. I feel like a female filmmaker.

Going viral on Telegram:

Heelys don’t have brakes because my swag rides forever.

Just landed via TikTok:

Wearing shorts and my pale legs screamed at the sensation of sunlight like vampires.

Going viral on Twitch:

Today’s youth will never experience the pain of spending all their pocket money on a music album. Because of ONE good song!

Shared recently on Slack:

This too shall pass… It may pass like a kidney stone, but it will pass.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Don’t invite me places. I was cesarean. I didn’t want to come out then and I certainly don’t want to now.

Going viral on Facebook:

Be the horrifying lore of your family’s lineage.

Making waves on Threads:

When I say “I’m open to feedback” I mean “I accept compliments.”

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication dating day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2266 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,428

Funny Quotes Topics

15,132

Funny Quotes Images

12,428

Updated

40 minutes ago

Users Online

3,437

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

Sending messages is easy. Living with them forever is the hard part.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has copied:

Warning: This movie contains “Adult Themes” such as interest rates, bad knees, back pain, and excitement about going to bed early.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

I bought a 12 year old whiskey. His parents are furious.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

I won $6 on a scratch-off last night. Out of my way, peasants!

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

I’ve just told my doctor I have all the Monkey Pox symptoms. He asked me to swing by tomorrow.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

Microdosing bungee jumping by bending over to pick up a hair tie.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

I made a resolution to eat better and exercise in the new year but didn’t specify which year I was referring to.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

About 40 muscles are activated when you eat just one donut. Follow me for more fitness advice.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has copied:

If you’re feeling a little uneasy about the state of global geopolitics, remember to spend as much time on your phone as possible. The more information you ingest as you scroll, the calmer you will become.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

Pretty sure I need to go back to bed and sleep for 3 days.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on YouTube:

You know you’re getting old when you and the grocery store have the same playlist.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Take my advice, I’m not using it.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

When I say I’m Christmas shopping the “for myself” is silent.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

IKEA is the swedish word for “relationship meltdown in a public place.”

Making waves on YouTube:

Before you have kids, ask yourself: how patient am I with really stupid people?

Just shared via WeChat:

I don’t have any patience because it takes too long.

Just shared via YouTube:

Adulthood is just waking up tired one day, and then being tired forever after that.

Just shared via Twitch:

Insulting me won’t work. I already said that to myself earlier.

Spotted on TikTok:

If you are lonely, dim all the lights and put on a horror movie. You won’t feel like you are lonely any more.

Going viral on X:

There is no actual wolf in Wolf of Wall Street.

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