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Someone from has viewed:

New COVID variant subscribes you to random podcasts.

Someone from has copied:

Having Christmas off in the middle of the work week and then forcing us to go back to work the next day feels so illegal.

Someone from has viewed:

Harry Potter is sort of crazy. I would have never fought a war for my high school.

Someone from has viewed:

Skin coloured leggings should be illegal.

Someone from has copied:

My dog sighs a lot for someone who doesn’t pay any bills.

Someone from has shared:

Men invented arm wrestling so they could hold hands and look into each other’s eyes.

Someone from has viewed:

Mom asked me what I was drinking the first time I got drunk and I said “breast milk” and now she’s not talking to me.

Someone from has viewed:

Jesus, I need money to organize your birthday.

Someone from has viewed:

Through repetition and sheer will I’ve mastered gracefully falling on my head.

Someone from has shared:

Could someone please come over here and be the adult? I’m too tired.

Funny Quotes Data

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10,954

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Social Media Log

Shared recently on Messenger:

I hated rats even before my girlfriend left me for one.

Going viral on Telegram:

Ever since I turned 20, someone is always in Japan or Italy. Is it like this forever?

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Just flipped my mattress, should have woken up my wife first.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I hope one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse is single.

Trending via TikTok:

Sitting next to you on an empty train and clicking my stopwatch every time you turn a page in your book.

Breaking via Instagram:

I could never work in an aquarium. I would have a penguin under my shirt at the end of the shift.

Breaking via Slack:

Never let your job prevent you from acting unemployed.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Not the sharpest cheddar on the charcuterie board.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Friends are God’s way of apologizing to us for our families.

Going viral on Instagram:

My phone went from fully charged to 10% while I was sleeping, so I guess it leads a more exciting nightlife than I do.

Home » Funny Pass Out Quotes

Funny pass out quotes

New funny pass out quotes

4 months ago
Share →: If you pass out in front of your kids they will either try to call an ambulance or use you as a trampoline. You just don’t know.

Commentary:
Ah, the eternal dilemma of parenthood: will your kids see you as a helpless patient in need of medical attention, or as a convenient landing pad for some impromptu trampoline tricks? It's a toss-up, really. Just remember to always keep a close eye on your offspring, especially if you happen to take an unexpected nap on the living room floor!
6 months ago
Share →: Whispering to paramedic before I pass out: save me, but not enough that I have to go to work tomorrow.

Commentary:
"Whispering to the paramedic before I pass out: Save me, but just enough that Monday can be postponed indefinitely #Priorities"