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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

Today I told my daughter she’s giving me a headache! She told me “For suggestions and complaints, contact the manufacturer.”

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

Adult friendships are like, “hey girl, let’s keep rescheduling to hangout until one of us dies.”

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

Male barista called me “my love” yesterday and didn’t say it today… getting mixed signals and feeling really upset.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

My keys fell in the snow, and now they’re gone forever — time to start a new life under a new name in a warmer climate.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

If Microsoft Edge is brave enough to ask to be your default browser, you can be brave enough to ask that girl out.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

If you can stand me, you deserve me!

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

The main difference between my dog and my kid is my dog responds to her name being called.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

My worst fear is looking out my window at night, and someone looking right at me.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

I’m on this new diet where I don’t consume anything that talks to me before the first coffee.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Did we do it, did we save the daylight?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Jan 7, 2026

3,654

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via TikTok:

Parents saying “I know my child” will forever be the funniest joke.

Going viral on Telegram:

I love when my Uber driver and I both shut the hell up for a full ride.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Home is where you trust the toilet seat.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Shark tooth necklaces are the perfect accessory if you want to look tough but also tell the world, “I’ve been to a gift shop.”

Going bananas on YouTube:

The biggest lesson employment has taught me is that efficient workers get punished with more work.

Trending via WhatsApp:

If they don’t look at you like you’re magic, disappear like Houdini.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Every day Facebook tells me I have memories and wants to show them to me. It’s like they have no appreciation for the cost or the amount of liquor I needed to erase them.

Just shared via Slack:

Getting left on read really gives me perspective on what Nigerian princes go through.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

I can’t wait to get married so I can bring home unnecessary stuff and get yelled at for it.

Spotted on Messenger:

No email needs to tell me not to reply.

Funny pass out quotes

Funny pass out quotes are the perfect way to laugh off those epic party moments when everything suddenly goes dark 😴🎉 Whether it’s a wild night or just a hilarious nap fail, these witty lines capture the chaos and comedy of hitting the floor like a pro 😂💤 Get ready to giggle and share the funniest ways people describe their legendary pass-out stories! 🥳🔥

New funny pass out quotes 👇

If you pass out in front of your kids they will either try to call an ambulance or use you as a trampoline. You just don’t know.

0

2 months ago

ambulance, call, funny situation, humor, just, kid, kids, parenting, pass, pass out, situation, trampoline, unexpected

Someone from 🇬🇪 has recently copied this quote.

41 shares on WhatsApp this month.
Whispering to paramedic before I pass out: save me, but not enough that I have to go to work tomorrow.

0

2 months ago

before, enough, health, humor, i, me, paramedic, pass, pass out, reluctance, save, tomorrow, work, workplace

Someone from 🇩🇿 has recently bookmarked this quote.

28 shares on LinkedIn this month.

All funny pass out quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

40 shares on Telegram this month:

No one is excited to see me in shorts except mosquitoes.

60 shares on Telegram this month:

The older I get, the more I start to understand the appeal of birdwatching as a hobby. I do find myself watching these little troublemakers quite often.

82 shares on Reddit this month:

My gf doesn’t really like it when I talk about my ex, which means I now have a lot of stories from college where I’m just alone for some reason.

83 shares on Messenger this month:

I suck at flirting. I’ll be like “is that so?”

24 shares on Slack this month:

The only way I’m gonna hit the gym is if I accidentally drive into it.

12 shares on X this month:

Yeah, I can explain that gap on my resume, I tried to move a picture in Word.

42 shares on Pinterest this month:

It’s okay to admit you want my lips on yours.

90 shares on Slack this month:

I wear sunglasses when I’m driving so nobody knows I’m asleep.

61 shares on Telegram this month:

Sorry I can’t have a pleasant, safe and affordable life, my government said no.

10 shares on Slack this month:

For years I thought an oncologist was just the doctor they kept on-call at all times.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

My husband said I use a lot of makeup, so I showed him some makeup tutorials on TikTok and I don’t think he’ll be making that mistake again.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

The way Christmas shopping expects me to have money right now is, honestly, disrespectful.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Money can’t buy happiness, until you’re on vacation and then you realize it definitely can.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I just need a little time to warm up to you, and then I’ll be super fun, I promise—1-2 years at most.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Taking the day off to brush up on conspiracy theories and really get this Thanksgiving party started.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

You aren’t from the Midwest unless you can spin out in the snow, regain control and keep driving like nothing happened.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I saw someone wearing a shirt today that said “Eat Pasta Run Fasta,” and I can’t get it out of my head.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I think there’s a size limit on engagement rings before they look tacky, to me.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I can’t stand when people need constant validation online. Like, comment, and retweet if you agree.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Children will see a neatly hanging dish towel and be like oh hell no.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,287

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

New year; new me. Just kidding. I’m already awesome.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Please continue to leave me out of the loop.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

I’m basically a taxi today for the kids and dogs.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

I’m drinking coffee so I don’t say mean things to you. You’re welcome.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

Great minds think alike, but so do stupid ones.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

I’m so single right now that I stood on a cliff and shouted, “I love you,” and my echo replied, “I just wanna be friends.”

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

Why is it cute when a baby falls asleep clutching a bottle. Yet, when I do it, it’s “concerning”?

Someone from 🇲🇭 has viewed:

I talk to myself in the same condescending tone, so you’re not special.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

There’s a reason you ain’t ever used your phone in a dream.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

If she has Bukowski on her nightstand, she will devour you.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WhatsApp:

Shoutout to everyone who works hard to support their dog’s extravagant lifestyle.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

I really don’t believe all of these women are actually named “Sassy”

Making waves on Messenger:

Mondays are for pretending. Real work begins on Tuesday.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Girls love a gay best friend until he turns 35 and asks to borrow your womb.

Making waves on Snapchat:

He thinks I’m so smart because I read books. Baby, they is FAWKING in these books.

Freshly posted on X:

Not much is worse than that feeling of going back to work after a lunch, or a vacation, or just going to work in general.

Going bananas on Messenger:

I used to think “9 to 5” means a job from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Play your cards right and we could be wearing matching fanny packs this summer.

Going viral on Discord:

Commenting “humiliation ritual” on a pic of my friend out with his family.

Just landed via WeChat:

Drove by a woman with her car broke down, I was going to stop and help until I remembered I don’t know anything about cars or women.

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