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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

Aliens traveled millions of light years to get here to visit New Jersey.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

I always say “morning” instead of “good morning”, because if it was a good morning, I’d still be asleep.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

When someone asks me why I’m leaving the party early, I say “I’m late for an appointment with my pajamas.”

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

Rorschach tests are like so easy. Everything’s either a demon or a butterfly and it’s up to you to decide.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

I modeled my morning routine on the humble rooster. Wake up, scream, wander around.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

Is my life this bad because I didn’t forward that email to 15 people back in 2007?

Someone from 🇪🇹 has viewed:

As soon as the sun comes back out, I want a beer. It’s science.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

Just read the Ten Commandments for the first time and you can’t do shit with your neighbor.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has shared:

I have nothing in common with people who “forget to eat”.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

If you wake up early enough, you can go back to sleep for a few hours. Not everyone knows this.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2311 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,473

Funny Quotes Topics

15,183

Funny Quotes Images

12,473

30 minutes ago

3,461

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Messenger:

“I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked Jesus Christ of Nazareth.

Reported on YouTube:

I think God’s next test for me should be, “Can he handle a ridiculous amount of money.”

Making waves on LinkedIn:

The reason I stay up late is because I don’t want my free time to end, and tomorrow to start.

Making waves on Facebook:

I always ask for a receipt so I can keep them in my purse for 86 years.

Making waves on Telegram:

Not being able to fall asleep is so embarrassing. All I’m asking my brain to do is nothing and it can’t even do that?

Just shared via Reddit:

Unfortunately, I’m gonna have to cancel my appointment at a sperm bank. I will just call them and say I can’t come.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

It’s not sleeping alone if there are crumbs in your bed.

Live now on WhatsApp:

What is your favorite movie where Tom Cruise runs really fast?

Trending via YouTube:

If life has taught me one thing, it’s that I need more money.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Before you call me an idiot consider this: I know!

Home » Funny Rumors Quotes

Funny rumors quotes

New funny rumors quotes 👇

6 months ago
Share →: There are rumors that someone came down the chimney last night. This is preposterous. I would have lost my mind.

Commentary:
🎅🔥 "Ah, the classic case of Santa vs. sanity! 🤪 Who needs evidence when we have our precious minds to protect? Don't worry, Santa, we've got our eye on you! 👀🎄"

For even more funny rumors quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny rumors quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2311 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,473

Funny Quotes Topics

15,183

Funny Quotes Images

12,473

30 minutes ago

3,459

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

Wooden pews are designed to maximize the shame of farting in church.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

Imagine she’s home alone, bored out of her mind, and she STILL won’t put that laundry away. She is me.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

I love when people say “be yourself,” like I haven’t already been doing that and scaring everyone off.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

Soup is great for when you’re hungry but want to still feel hungry afterward.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

Americans be like, “MM:DD:YY” is how you say dates verbally, and then have a national holiday called “4th of July.”

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

My favorite thing about summer is opening a window for 30 seconds so an insect that hasn’t been identified by science yet can fly into your home.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

Putting away the Christmas tree. Sad day for cats.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

Keeping my mouth shut is usually not enough to avoid an argument with my husband. I also have to deactivate the subtitle function on my face.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

Went to an antique show and people started bidding on me.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

I’m gonna turn all this pain into something beautiful, like a tweet or a close friends story.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Discord:

I am dressing for the job I want. I want to be a sweatpants model.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

My doctor told me to eat more Taco Bell. Well, he actually said “less McDonald’s”, but I’m pretty sure I know what he meant.

Trending via TikTok:

The answer is always no, I did not get enough sleep.

Live now on Reddit:

Hell hath no fury like a toddler who lost the chance to push a button.

Making waves on TikTok:

Airlines when they need to change your flight: here’s a complimentary napkin. Airlines when you need to change your flight: that’ll be $8700.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

I’ll be like “it is what it is” and almost vomit from anxiety.

Just shared via Telegram:

I was not meant to work a job; I was meant to lay down and ponder.

Reported on Slack:

I spend all day on Facebook so that Mark Zuckerberg can eat.

Making waves on Discord:

Food gives you energy to nap more.

Going viral on Threads:

I took my kids to the zoo when they were small, I wonder how they are getting on now.

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