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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

Spring is what we call the time in between complaining about the cold and complaining about the heat.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

That awkward moment when you’ve said “What?” three times, so you just say “Oh, yeah..” even though you have no idea what they said.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

I see why grandmas used to cook dinner at 3 p.m. and sit down the rest of the day.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Prophecy class has been cancelled due to unforeseen circumstances.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

I have no prime. I will evolve till I die.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

I need to social distance with the refrigerator so I can flatten my curve.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

One year of friendship, and I’ve not seen your breasts? Are we really friends?

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

I feel like we’re on like the 50th or 60th horseman of the apocalypse by now.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

We went on a family vacation and it was a terrible experience. It was all whining, complaining, and tantrums. And don’t get me started on what my kids did.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

I put the ‘no’ in ‘I will let u know’.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,753

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via LinkedIn:

People aren’t so bad if you stay indoors and don’t talk to them.

Just shared via Threads:

I love being wrong, it’s just like being right except easier and I get to be stupid, which is my favorite thing.

Spotted on Twitch:

Sorry, can’t go out tonight. My bed told me it needs me, and I can’t let it down.

Spotted on Snapchat:

“I’m getting to an age where I realize I shouldn’t have laughed at my grandparents for having an ‘upstairs’ vacuum.”

Going viral on Facebook:

Imagine hating me and i’m just over here doing a much better job at hating myself than any of y’all could do.

Just landed via Reddit:

Caught the bouquet at the funeral.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I wish the homes of all my friends were connected to mine by secret underground tunnels.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Shade coming from a tree bearing no fruit could never phase me. Carry on.

Just landed via Threads:

Might make a living will because I don’t want my family deciding whether to pull the plug. My dad has a long history of being against wasting electricity.

Trending via WeChat:

No revenge, because losing someone like me is enough.

Funny sit outside quotes

Funny sit outside quotes are the perfect way to add a splash of laughter to your outdoor chill time 🌞😂 Whether you’re soaking up the sun, enjoying a breeze, or just pretending to be productive on the porch, these witty lines will have you smiling in no time 🌿😎 Grab your favorite drink, find your comfiest spot, and get ready to laugh your way through some seriously relatable outdoor vibes! 🍹🌸

New funny sit outside quotes 👇

All funny sit outside quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

18 shares on Messenger this month:

Reverse cowgirl so he doesn’t see the double chin.

20 shares on Telegram this month:

I miss when The Weeknd was making sex-addict-on-drugs music.

53 shares on X this month:

I never make the same mistake twice. I make it like five or six times. You know, just to be sure.

28 shares on Discord this month:

Managers want a week of silence and meditation in order to be even more of a manager afterwards.

60 shares on Pinterest this month:

“I can’t possibly lose this if I put it here” I say to myself before completely forgetting where here is.

13 shares on Facebook this month:

I can’t stand people who require so much validation. Please like and share this if you agree.

68 shares on Snapchat this month:

Welcome to social media. A person who does not understand humor will contact you shortly.

61 shares on Twitch this month:

“Slipping in the shower and trying to hold on to the water jet…” Shall I tell you more about myself?

34 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“Kiss From a Rose” makes you think Batman Forever is the most romantic movie ever made.

71 shares on Messenger this month:

Having a pool is so neat. All of your friends are suddenly interested to catch up on the hottest days of the year.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Porn actresses envy the look on my face when I clean my ear with a cotton bud.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Cleaning a house with children in it is like shoveling snow on the North Pole.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

“Seize the day!” No thank you. I will leave the day alone and hope it extends me the same courtesy.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

The Sunday struggle is wanting to relax and wanting a clean house, but also not wanting to clean or move.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

The husband, child, and dog are all snoring. WTF is this?

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Ah, summer. When my non-consensual relationship with mosquitoes begins.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

That pen in the junk drawer that hasn’t been used in four years picked today to have an attitude.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Had an interview today, and my belly rumbled. The lady goes, “Missed lunch?” I told her, “Nah, I’m hungry for success!”

14 folks are currently checking 👀

If you don’t have anything nice to say, sign up for Twitter.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Go outside and let the rain do what your boyfriend can’t.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,654

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

I’m not an alcoholic, I only drink twice a year. When it’s sunny, and when it isn’t.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

If the earth was flat, many people would have already jumped off it.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

My sleep apnea was diagnosed at a staff meeting.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

Beer is Narcan for when you overdose on Microsoft Teams.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

The problem with self-checkout is that all the cashiers are idiots.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

My kid is turning out just like me. Well played, karma. Well-played.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has downloaded:

Nothing hits harder than opening the fridge for the fifth time, hoping new food magically appeared.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

“You’re an athlete,” I whisper to myself, as I begin my third attempt to get out of the couch.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

Foreplay is great, I particularly like the part where I peel them, chop them into pieces, then roast them in the oven until they’re all crispy and delicious.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

If you love someone, let them sleep.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Messenger:

Rental car companies seem so insanely helpless at their one job. You show up at the airport, reservation in hand, and they’re like, ‘Wait, really? You wanted a car? Sorry, you totally caught me off guard.’

Making waves on Pinterest:

If you saw me licking the plate after the charcuterie was finished, no you didn’t.

Shared recently on YouTube:

“You’re a flirt!” God forbid a girl has good communication skills.

Broadcasted on Discord:

I love when people say “be yourself,” like I haven’t already been doing that and scaring everyone off.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Aside from cocaine, has anyone figured out what that little pocket on your jeans is for?

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Toddlers are like puppies, they don’t care if they’re dirty and smelly and they both have an affinity exploring the trash bin.

Shared recently on YouTube:

You sound unhinged. Let’s go get mugshots.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Taking off my house pajamas to put on my errands pajamas.

Just landed via Discord:

Solitude never hits you with unsolicited opinions.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Nobody gives me butterflies anymore. Y’all just give me brain damage.

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