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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

That’s just brainslop. You only came up with that by thinking.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

I’d be a terrible masseuse. After 5 minutes, I’d be like, “Okay, my turn.”

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

Anxiety should have a loyalty rewards program.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

I miss when The Weeknd was making sex-addict-on-drugs music.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

According to the BMI chart, I am too short.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

“Are you ok?” Of course not. Next question!

Someone from 🇹🇹 has viewed:

“I’m going to try underthinking about a situation, and see if that works.”

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Can we change the phrase “Can I be frank with you” to “Can I be william with you”? I don’t want to be Frank.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

When I die, I hope I’m remembered for my ability to take any bad situation and make it worse.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

My bed has a stronger influence on me than my ambitions.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

299 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,568

Funny Quotes Topics

17,624

Funny Quotes Images

15,568

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,715

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Why can’t Chinese restaurants chop the broccoli in their dishes? I feel like I’m trying to fit an entire bonsai tree into my mouth.

Just shared via X:

Don’t break someone’s heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206 of them.

Making waves on Snapchat:

I really understand why boomers text with ellipses between everything… it feels so good…

Freshly posted on Threads:

When buying presents I like to think, what would Jesus have got you? So yeah, enjoy your fish sandwich.

Live now on Messenger:

I’m so old, I used to block people by simply holding the door shut.

Just shared via Telegram:

“I’m not short. I’m just more down to earth than most people.”

Spotted on Slack:

Every frozen pizza is a canvas that needs an artist’s touch.

Trending via Threads:

Sex is cool, but have you ever had garlic bread?

Shared recently on Telegram:

If pills are too toxic to flush down the toilet, you probably shouldn’t swallow them.

Making waves on Pinterest:

The best part of the relationship is before you meet them, and you’re single.

Funny span quotes

Funny span quotes are here to brighten your day with a splash of humor and wit! 😂 Whether you’re celebrating relationships, family, or those quirky moments that make life unforgettable, these playful sayings will have you chuckling in no time. Ready for some laughs and clever twists? Let’s dive into a world where words bring smiles and good vibes only! 🎉🤣✨

New funny span quotes 👇

All funny span quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Telegram this month:

I want a small, tasteful wedding. No family. No friends. No groom. Just me eating a big cake.

69 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Friendly reminder that someone having a different opinion about a movie than you is a direct attack on you as a person and you should take it very personally.

40 shares on Pinterest this month:

I hate overhead lighting – trying to mimic the holy sun should be considered sinful. The lamp is much better, mimicking the hearths of our forebears.

68 shares on Discord this month:

Victor Frankenstein being only 23 years old when he made the monster is crazy to me, he should have been at the club.

98 shares on Twitch this month:

If anything I post makes you mad, just know that it pleases me.

77 shares on Pinterest this month:

Get a puppy if you are in the market for a best friend who gets you up early so she can bite you excitedly.

57 shares on WeChat this month:

I don’t have mirrors in my house. I mean, who wants to see disappointment everyday?

19 shares on WeChat this month:

One thing I love about the internet is seeing some of the most hateful people posting inspirational quotes.

85 shares on TikTok this month:

Dogs naturally form packs, and if left undisturbed, will teach themselves how to play poker.

66 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Today’s politics make me think we’re living in a movie where the villains actually win.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I get ignored so much, my name should be “terms and conditions”.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

The biggest problem with finding another job is I don’t want one.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

What’s a good career for people with no motivation or talent?

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Look, a three-day weekend is all I ask. The rest can be four-day weekends.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Telling my boss I wasn’t drunk really backfired. I probably should have waited until he asked.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely responded to my telepathic messages.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Hello, my voicemail is currently unavailable. To leave a message please speak slowly and clearly into the nearest toaster.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing makes me more stabby than when my husband ignores me and starts talking to the dog.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

And for my next trick, I will appear to know what I’m doing.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

The year number is getting too big, let’s do another Jesus soon.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

299 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,568

Funny Quotes Topics

17,624

Funny Quotes Images

15,568

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,378

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇷 has copied:

Do you ever cycle through the same 4 apps on your phone over and over again, and feel like a tiger pacing its cage at the zoo?

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

The horror of being warned that the person you’re about to meet is “fine once you get to know them”.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

I just sneezed next to my computer and the anti-virus popped up.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

Don’t worry. There is still hope for the summer: the rain should get warmer soon.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

I have no idea how people meet at the gym. I turn into a disgusting, angry swamp witch every time I exercise.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

Hobosexual. A person who dates you with the sole interest of having a place to stay.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

Why, as a hair, would you even wanna be ingrown. Like why are you doing that?

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

Turns out “V for Vendetta” is not an educational movie and it won’t teach your kids the alphabet.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

I hate lying to my parents but it’s for their own good.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

You want me to pay attention to the details? The thing the devil is in?

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Going out on Friday night will always be better than going out on a Saturday night.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

You’ll be watching a series, and they’ll just randomly start playing the best song you’ve ever heard in your life.

Shared recently on Slack:

Penguins are just ducks going to a wedding.

Spotted on Snapchat:

I got so lost there for a minute (several years).

Going bananas on YouTube:

Nothing makes you regret an outfit choice faster than when you see teens looking at you and whispering.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Oh no, we don’t go in there. That room belongs to the spiders.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Someday I will make a sandwich that will change my life forever.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

People who shower at night are bold enough to assume tomorrow’s even happening.

Trending via Threads:

I love being single because how could I explain a 2 p.m. – 5 p.m. nap on a Saturday.

Seen just now on Slack:

My theory is that women’s voices contain frequencies that men simply can’t hear.

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