Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

Mayor of a small town is such a wild job. It’s like being the president of a country where you went to high school with the whole population.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

I assume people who bookmark my posts are building a case against me.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

The worst thing about being an adult is that you have to be one every single day.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

I think you misunderstood – when I said, “Let me look into it,” that meant, “I don’t know exactly how to tell you no just yet.”

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

I’m not shy. I just don’t like you.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

Someone has left me a voicemail. I don’t know what to do. Open the phone app? The contacts? Do I turn on the TV?

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

Why touch grass when you can touch ass?

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

Quitting my job to focus on staying inside.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has bookmarked:

After a vacation, I usually return to work with a fresh, reenergized hatred for my job.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

HR has told me to stop saying ‘How stupid can you be?’ to members of staff. They’re worried it’s being taken as a challenge.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,526

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Slack:

In the 90s, you’d always find your way to some stranger’s house.

Live now on TikTok:

Dating someone from Twitter is like believing a stripper loves you.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Whoever came up with the name “dentures” really missed the opportunity to call them “substitooths”.

Making waves on WeChat:

Before you laugh at kids who believe in Santa, remember there are grown men who believe that Cristiano Ronaldo is a better footballer than Lionel Messi.

Spotted on X:

I hate it when people threaten to come over. Now I’ve got to do 2 years of housework in 30 minutes.

Seen just now on Twitch:

My dental plan is, “I guess I’ll just chew on this side of my mouth from now on.”

Making waves on TikTok:

When I said you had a “serial killer face” I had meant it as a compliment. Like, you look like you are very ambitious is what I meant.

Trending via Discord:

Good morning to life’s chaos, where my coffee is the only thing that makes sense!

Just shared via YouTube:

Once you realize I’m an idiot, my posts start to make a lot more sense.

Trending via Slack:

Body: Okay, sleepy time. Brain: Okay, thinky time.

Funny staff meeting quotes

Funny staff meeting quotes 😂 are the perfect way to lighten up those endless office gatherings! Whether you’re stuck in a never-ending agenda or just need a quick chuckle, these witty gems 💡 bring humor to the daily grind. Spice up your next meeting or share a laugh with coworkers 🤣—because sometimes, a little fun is the best productivity boost! 🚀

New funny staff meeting quotes 👇

All funny staff meeting quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

20 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Oh, to be a rich, beautiful woman in her big car, driving to buy overpriced groceries to stock up her breathtaking kitchen in her gorgeous house.

24 shares on Twitch this month:

I hate when someone on a magazine cover stares at me while I eat.

92 shares on Instagram this month:

“Kiss From a Rose” makes you think Batman Forever is the most romantic movie ever made.

80 shares on Threads this month:

Good morning. I’m ready for attention now.

83 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m so old, I still drink my coffee at home in the morning. From a real cup.

10 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Your fingers have fingertips, but your toes don’t have toetips. Yet, you can tiptoe but not tipfinger.

12 shares on Snapchat this month:

Doctors are always giving me Ibuprofen. Man, give me something I can sell.

31 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I am woman, hear me roar but also meow because I am sensitive.

78 shares on Discord this month:

Bag of salad is the boxed wine of vegetables.

60 shares on Snapchat this month:

I just paid my taxes. The roads should be fixed any day now.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

What was the main bloke called in Harry Potter?

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Just so you know, what you now call an energy bar is what my father gave the canary.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Seems like the ‘how to use a fire extinguisher’ video on YouTube shouldn’t have a 30-second ad before it.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Be the reason someone burns sage.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

The invention of locks was a key turning point in history.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, I’m late. I was trying to convince a bathroom hand dryer that I exist.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite Slipknot member is the one who wears the mask.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve found that the easiest way to do burpees is to just not do burpees. No pain, no pain.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

The second half of your life begins when you stop wanting to get even and start wanting to get odd.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Today’s the day I’m gonna’ make the onions cry.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,594

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

If I was polyamorous, I think Id date my girlfriend three times.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

Just once, I want a username and password prompt to say: “Close Enough.”

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

People remind me everyday why I prefer being on my own.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

Remember when we were young we wanted to stay up for New Year’s? Now we’re old and cursing because we’re staying up past 9:30 and our entire sleep routine is disturbed.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

Next to nothing is a weird place.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

There are drug-sniffing dogs, guide dogs, dogs that save lives. And then there’s my dog, who hits the lead when he poops.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has copied:

I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control. I thought to myself, “Wow, this changes everything.”

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

Have you ever been so hungry but had no food in the house, so you took a nap instead?

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

Sorry, boss, I can’t come in to work today, I’m gonna be playing outside.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has downloaded:

Obviously, I’m gonna upload pictures with filters and in my best angles. If you wanna see the ugly side of me, come to my house, but bring ice cream.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

My morning routine consists of talking myself out of quitting my job.

Shared recently on Twitch:

We’re all in the billionaire submarine now.

Going viral on YouTube:

Me, to the printer: “Hey, could you print this out for me?” Printer: “Sure, but first I’ll show you all the sounds I can make.”

Trending via Discord:

I used to be a person who couldn’t easily fall asleep, then I got divorced and now I sleep like a baby. Probably unrelated.

Going viral on Threads:

Missed garbage day today, if you’re looking for a bad boy that doesn’t play by the rules.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I always figure it out on my own, I just need to panic first.

Going bananas on Threads:

Welcome to your 40s, your level of cleaning is directly related to whether your guest can see without readers.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Why steal office supplies from work when you could take an extra-long bathroom break and steal company time instead?

Freshly posted on Discord:

Death cannot harm me more than you have harmed me, my beloved life.

Shared recently on Slack:

Millennials are just 30-40-year-olds who look 20-30 years old and feel 80-90 years old.

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