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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

I tell it like it is: Sometimes I watch the calls on my cell phone and just wait for it to stop ringing.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

I don’t know much, but I do know melancholia is a way cooler diagnosis than depression.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

I took the road less traveled. Where am I?

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

I love when my cat sighs at me, like what’s got you stressed out my little freeloading homicidal maniac!?

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

The first time you forgive out of love. The second time out of hope and the third time out of stupidity.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

I don’t call them exes, I call them whys.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

“It’s swimsuit season” I say, eating another swimsuit.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

Called in, “Taking a gap year.”

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life, or they are living it to the fullest.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2402 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,564

Funny Quotes Topics

15,241

Funny Quotes Images

12,564

Updated

60 minutes ago

Users Online

3,436

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Slack:

Daffodil totally sounds like an insult, you blooming daffodil.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

It’s called a “sports car” because getting out of one after 40 is a physical event.

Going viral on YouTube:

Kinda rude my neighbors live next to me.

Just landed via Reddit:

You’ve agreed to go out with me, so that’s going to immediately count against you.

Just shared via Telegram:

If he doesn’t like your fruit puns, you need to let that mango.

Going viral on Messenger:

I miss when bills had nothing to do with me.

Making waves on Twitch:

Just give your kids the iPad. They’re the ones who’ll be fighting cyborgs in the future.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

Welcome to adulthood. The weekend is your only time to catch up on everything, but also your only time to do absolutely nothing.

Just landed via YouTube:

Alexa, mute my children.

Seen just now on Threads:

Why do they have to make things childproof when I’m still functioning at a kindergarten level of dexterity?

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2402 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,564

Funny Quotes Topics

15,241

Funny Quotes Images

12,564

Updated

60 minutes ago

Users Online

3,444

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

I don’t have mirrors in my house. I mean, who wants to see disappointment everyday?

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

If you really think about it, extraordinary isn’t that great. It’s just an extra helping of ordinary.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

Drinking a beer alone with terrible posture.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

Does anyone have the number of the witch from Snow White? I need a few apples.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

Wish I came with subtitles because I mumble a lot.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

If someone else makes you a sandwich, it’s always better than if you do it yourself. It’s the same with sex.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

I just need to get over everything that has happened to me in my entire life and then we can hang out.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

A garlic a day keeps people away.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Life is weird and then you die.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

Calm down, engine light, if I can run on broken parts, so can you.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

If you don’t have dating allegations with your best friend, you are not bestfriending hard enough.

Just landed via WeChat:

I’m ready for a new relationship. My past is buried in the backyard, to fertilize the tomatoes.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Dog barking like an angry baby, baby crying like an angry dog.

Just shared via Telegram:

Too many losers and not enough people telling them they’re losers.

Making waves on Discord:

Wouldn’t it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer and come out wrinkle free?

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

My problem is I always think I can get ready in 15 minutes when I have repeatedly proven that I can’t.

Just landed via Discord:

Whenever І wake up and see that someone has wrіtten a bunch of funny posts before noon, І assume they are a mornіng drіnker.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Ever thought about centaurs and how the bottom half would start walking immediately after birth but the top part would be baby-like and flop around for a while.

Just shared via X:

My son just turned an everything bagel into an everywhere bagel.

Reported on Discord:

Can’t believe we used to throw eggs at houses, and now we can afford neither eggs nor houses.

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