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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

You learn a lot about someone when you marry them. For example, I learned I should have married someone else.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

No place in this world is as dark as my archived chats on WhatsApp.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Waiting for my wife to approve my new year’s resolution of making independent decisions.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

Losing weight in your 40’s: LOL!

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

Wish my metabolism worked as fast as my anxiety.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

Senility is the pits. Spent an hour driving around the mall parking lot looking for my car.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

I just want someone who can read a book with me in silence, and then do ungodly things sometimes.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

I was googling the best time to visit Italy. It is when you have money.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

I bought a little bag of air today. The company that made it was kind enough to put some potato chips in it as well.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has downloaded:

The more water you drink, the more bathroom breaks, the less you work. Stay hydrated.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

299 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,568

Funny Quotes Topics

17,624

Funny Quotes Images

15,568

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,698

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

Many years ago, I stood up to 100-200 million others only to sit in meetings now.

Just landed via Telegram:

One of my biggest talents is taking hundreds of screenshots that I swear I’ll need, but I never look at them again.

Making waves on Twitch:

Why would I work from home when I don’t even work from work?

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

The older I get, the easier it is for me to look at a situation and say: “Yeahhh, I’m out.”

Going viral on Telegram:

Do you think the washing machine and the dryer are actual friends or just work friends?

Just shared via Reddit:

Calling it a situationship, and the whole time, the situation is that they don’t want you.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

When my husband says he’ll just be a minute, I know I have enough time to watch an entire television series, paint the house, or go on a quest.

Just landed via Reddit:

I don’t even know who’s famous anymore.

Live now on Slack:

I’m not built to work, I’m built to brood in a castle with all my unread books.

Going viral on Facebook:

I’ve found God. It’s my turn to hide now.

Funny tide quotes

Funny tide quotes 🌊 bring a splash of humor to beach days and ocean vibes! Whether you’re riding the waves or just daydreaming by the shore, these witty sayings will tide you over with laughs and good vibes 😄🌴. Perfect for sharing with friends or adding a chuckle to your coastal adventures, get ready to dive into some seriously punny ocean fun! 🐚😂

New funny tide quotes 👇

All funny tide quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

63 shares on Facebook this month:

Mama didn’t raise no fool, I turned into one all on my own.

92 shares on X this month:

I’m so lazy that I get jealous when it’s bedtime in other countries.

33 shares on Twitch this month:

I’m doing a terrific job of not getting anything done today.

97 shares on WeChat this month:

Forget Spotify Wrapped. How many minutes did you spend listening to your girlfriend this year?

12 shares on Twitch this month:

Imagine working at Pornhub. At like the corporate office as a developer or whatever. White collar. That’s gotta be a weird job. Working there has gotta be bloody weird.

76 shares on X this month:

I know you miss me. The tarot lady on TikTok just told me.

98 shares on Facebook this month:

My hair will never allow me to commit any crime; I leave my DNA everywhere.

51 shares on Slack this month:

Have to wear real clothes on Monday. Pray for me.

21 shares on LinkedIn this month:

It really cannot be overstated how many of your problems disappear once you have a beautiful woman who is in love with you.

62 shares on Pinterest this month:

Elections make you feel like we’re all in divorce court waiting to see who gets custody of us.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t think I’ve ever made the right amount of pasta.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Touched a tree and accidentally absorbed 400 years of wisdom and 2 squirrel secrets.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I wonder if my guardian angel and my future husband’s guardian angel are in a group chat trying to coordinate.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Quitting my job to focus on watching YouTube.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Roses are red. Pizza sauce is too. I ordered a large. And none of it’s for you.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

For my birthday, I want everyone to tell me how much they love me and why in immense detail.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Half of all the problems in life can be solved by duct tape. For the rest, you’re gonna have to reboot that computer.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

75% of being a divorce lawyer is just answering emails from clients saying, “No. No. No. You absolutely cannot do that, no.”

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I could never work in an aquarium. I would have a penguin under my shirt at the end of the shift.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

299 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,568

Funny Quotes Topics

17,624

Funny Quotes Images

15,568

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,644

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

You can either have a nice evening or you can help your child with their math homework. You can’t have both.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

I’m a big believer in not going to work on your birthday!

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

Everything is a sign from God if you’re schizophrenic enough.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

If she says “so just what exactly is THAT supposed to mean”, you’re gonna have a bad time.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Currently into monogamous friendships. If you have other friends, please don’t talk to me, it hurts my heart.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

My ex had this fetish where he would dress up in his own clothes and act like an idiot.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

Have you tried making guacamole about it?

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

My friends put their kid to bed and then made us ice cream sundaes, which is exactly what I assumed was happening when my parents put me to bed.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has downloaded:

Seeing my kids getting along, laughing, and peacefully playing together is the best minute of my day.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

Just did my best horse impression and the doctor still won’t give me ketamine.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Maybe the reason we weren’t that affected by all the violence we saw in cartoons as kids is because it was offset by classical music.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Why do birds love going apeshit first thing in the morning?

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Type of hangover that makes you understand why normies spend $25 for a poor soul to bike a bagel to them.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

How do you react when you see someone you respect on an e-scooter?

Spotted on WeChat:

When I dance, people say it reminds them of a wild dog chasing its tail.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Happy to report that “what time is it/time for you to get a watch” is still being used by the youths.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Sorry I can’t help you move, my hands are in permanent air quotes.

Trending via Facebook:

I’m going to die from jealousy one day.

Going viral on WeChat:

I am at my Thanksgiving table observing personality disorders that have not been identified yet.

Going viral on Instagram:

Forget hot girl summer, it’s rot girl summer (laying in bed, reading books, laying under layers of soft blankets).

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