Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

Life is full of questions. Idiots are full of answers.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has downloaded:

Chickens only make one sound, because they can’t think outside the bawks.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

Please be nice to me. I’m in my twenties. Do you know what that does to a person?

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

Every girl keeps an extra boyfriend and calls him ‘best friend’.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

Preparing for the apocalypse by becoming fluent in zombie.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

Parents become grandparents and lose all their senses. All of a sudden, they got McDonald’s money now.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

Time Magazine should have a Worst Person of the Year!

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

Normalize throwing lamps at people who need to lighten up.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

You know shit’s about to get real when I put on yoga pants before dessert.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

Job applications be like “how did you hear about us?”. Bro why, was it a secret?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,553

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WeChat:

Trust my gut? The thing that can’t even handle milk.

Shared recently on Telegram:

The more I practice, the luckier I get.

Trending via Instagram:

I be like, “Who’s praying on my downfall?” as if I don’t make self-destructive life decisions.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Reverse cowgirl so I can post selfies.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I like to notice patterns and do nothing about it.

Going viral on Twitch:

Violence is not the answer, unless you’re a gaggle of children instructed to break into a piñata.

Live now on WeChat:

My favorite type of gender reveal is the one where they just tell me and I don’t have to go to a party to find out.

Trending via Slack:

A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it.

Spotted on Messenger:

Sometimes I wanna delete all my social media and throw my phone into a river.

Freshly posted on X:

Don’t let me drive if you’re gonna scream every time we almost die.

I can keep my mouth shut, but you can read the subtitles on my face.

3 weeks ago

Witty quote about facial expressions revealing more than words, with a playful and humorous vibe.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When your face leaks spoilers even before your brain hits pause 😅🤐📺

communication, emotion, expression, face, face reading, facial, facial expression, honesty, humor, i, keep, mouth, read, reading, sarcasm, shut, subtitles

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

65 shares on TikTok this month:

Laundry has to be the most sinister chore. Always waiting, always lurking.

56 shares on WeChat this month:

You know you got a bad haircut when she insists on giving you a $10 discount.

10 shares on Facebook this month:

I don’t care for small talk. I prefer awkward silence.

65 shares on Facebook this month:

If someone wants to spend time with you, they’ll let you know. Get rid of those people.

87 shares on Snapchat this month:

In your 20s and 30s, you’ll start rediscovering the niche interests and hobbies you had as a kid. It’s very important you revisit them. Your younger self was actually on to something.

50 shares on Twitch this month:

My favorite things about Twitter are that everything you read is true, everyone is nice, and all intentions are pure of heart.

15 shares on Discord this month:

I’m officially at the age where I understand why my parents never wanted to go anywhere after work.

39 shares on YouTube this month:

“Don’t bring a knife to a gun fight!” Okay, then explain bayonets to me.

45 shares on X this month:

Shazam-ing a song in public feels the same as taking out a big hammer and bonking yourself on the head.

70 shares on Facebook this month:

When is this robot army coming to take my job?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

Wouldn’t it be great if we could put ourselves in the dryer and come out wrinkle free?

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

How many cups of coffee is OK to have every day? Is it eight? I’m pretty sure it’s eight.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

Having leftover pizza for breakfast is an actual blessing.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

Self-care is smoking a solo blunt with music.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

My problem areas are my upper arms and earth.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

A chocolate advent calendar is a test of restraint that I simply do not have.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has bookmarked:

Maybe I’ll quit so I can focus on summer.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

My boyfriend moved in with me straight from Hotel Mama. In a way, I’m now a single parent.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

Roses are red, my name is not Dave, this makes no sense, microwave.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

Due to unforeseen circumstances, I will be acting weird today.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WeChat:

Facebook should just go back to being Hot or Not dot com.

Making waves on Telegram:

It’s this time again when you have to choose between coffee and mulled wine in the morning.

Trending via WeChat:

I was going to go for a run, then realized I could just run my mouth on here.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Has someone told the whales that they can’t sing?

Going viral on Snapchat:

Can I come over and overstay my welcome?

Freshly posted on YouTube:

If you only watched reality TV dating shows, you would probably estimate the number of people who work in medical device sales in the United States to be approximately 80,000,000.

Just shared via WeChat:

Your coworkers are your friends; stop working and hang out.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I’m surprised some of you are allowed out of your house on your own.

Spotted on Facebook:

When I’m president, I will add an additional hour between 6 and 7pm.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I can keep my mouth shut, but you can read the subtitles on my face.

I forgot to sweep up some crumbs earlier, and I just heard an ant moaning in pleasure as he discovered the bounty.

Why is Subway asking me for a tip? Bro, we made this sandwich together.

I only went to medical school to figure out where your arms are supposed to go when you sleep and they didn’t even teach us that.

Got fired from my job at the zoo because I kept trying to wax the turtles.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I can keep my mouth shut, but you can read the subtitles on my face.

Keep the laugh going 😂

I forgot to sweep up some crumbs earlier, and I just heard an ant moaning in pleasure as he discovered the bounty.

Why is Subway asking me for a tip? Bro, we made this sandwich together.

Stop bothering me, or I will inform you of a behavioral pattern that is noticeable to other people, but I can tell you are not yet aware of.

I only went to medical school to figure out where your arms are supposed to go when you sleep and they didn’t even teach us that.

Nothing more humiliating than sending a text message with a picture and the picture doesn’t send for ages and now you’ve said something sooo odd out of context.

Got fired from my job at the zoo because I kept trying to wax the turtles.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨