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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

Stop making eye contact with me, I can’t afford a wedding right now.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

Don’t fall in love. It’s bad.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

I have nothing nice to wear for the government shutdown.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

Gravity called. It’s sick of holding me up.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

The rainforest cafe won’t be authentic enough for me if they don’t bulldoze 40% of the restaurant while I’m there.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

We’re all naughty, some just more than others.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

I do believe in aliens, but do they also believe in me?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,924

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Snapchat:

It’s the weekend, so naturally, I’m going to spend 48 hours doing nothing, and still be exhausted.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Me, in heaven: Can you take a photo of me sitting on that cloud?

Going viral on Instagram:

Traveling back in time to proudly inform Benjamin Franklin that my stove has wifi.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I love icebreakers. They really give me time to anxiously reflect on what the most fun fact about me is, while I don’t listen to anyone else at all.

Breaking via X:

I love dogs with human names because you get to say things like Bob pooped on the rug again.

Shared recently on TikTok:

All these years on the internet we have been working for artificial intelligence.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Parents be like “Boys are easier,” and then their daughter has to save the family from ruin.

Might put on a bikini and run through your DMs.

1 month ago

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Commentary:
"Bold move! Just hope there’s a lifeguard in those DMs to save me from drowning in laughter! 😂🏊‍♀️💌"

activity, bikini, DM, DMs, flirt, fun, fun activity, humor, media, put, run, social, social media, through

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Trying to work outside on a laptop is like sunbathing on a melting ice cube.

3 months ago
comparison, cube, funny comparison, ice, ice cube, laptop, melting, outside, sunbathing, trying, work
I was waiting on the universe but the universe was actually waiting on me.

1 month ago
expectations, humor, i, irony, me, reflection, self-discovery, timing, universe, waiting
Accidentally manifested an emotionally intelligent man that is hot and can cook. We’re currently staring at each other.

1 month ago
accidentally, attraction, chemistry, cook, cooking, crush, date, emotional, emotional intelligence, emotionally, hot, humor, intelligence, intelligent, man, manifestation, serendipity, staring
I put the “sexy” in “dyslexic.”

1 month ago
dyslexic, humor, i, pun, put, sexy, wordplay
It’s okay to run away from the cops if you’re shy.

1 month ago
away, cops, escape, humor, introvert, okay, police, run, run away, shy
Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

1 month ago
activity, babe, book, books, concern, fun, fun activity, okay, reading, relationship, unread, unread book

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

“You never reply to messages.” I am just one person, okay? I am understaffed.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

The end of Twitter is taking forever. Did Tolkien write this?

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

I’m not “dating to marry” or “dating for fun.” I’m dating for a secret third reason.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

I got 3 miles in before breakfast. That’s enough driving for the day.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

There is no ‘we’ in ‘food’.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

Fun fact: The US was originally not meant to be a reality TV show.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

Life hack: Allow yourself 8–12 hours of alone time every morning to prepare for the day.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Pinterest:

Selling porn is gross, but selling food and small household items is grocer.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Some of you aren’t reading the room. Not even listening to the room on audiobook.

Just landed via Discord:

I was an ugly baby. It’s been downhill since then.

Live now on Discord:

I could never journal, I’d start lying in there too.

Just landed via Instagram:

Wish I could just go back to eating cookies and not knowing what day it was.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Me, at the intervention: “Ah look, all the reasons I drink gathered in one place.”

Just shared via Snapchat:

Don’t ever get excited if your kid likes a new food. They won’t like it tomorrow.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Might put on a bikini and run through your DMs.

Trying to work outside on a laptop is like sunbathing on a melting ice cube.

I was waiting on the universe but the universe was actually waiting on me.

Accidentally manifested an emotionally intelligent man that is hot and can cook. We’re currently staring at each other.

I put the “sexy” in “dyslexic.”

It’s okay to run away from the cops if you’re shy.

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Forget tequila, I’m at the age where you can wake up with a hangover from Netflix.

When I’m done eating… I have to show my hands to my cat, like I’m a blackjack dealer.

I love when people start getting filler, and instead of looking younger, it’s just like okay, your face is getting really, really big in all directions.

Netflix should’ve just maybe mailed us all this fight on DVD.

Rare earth, this rare earth, that. There’s nothing more rare on this earth than affordable housing in a walkable neighborhood.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Iced coffee and crying, the most Californian afternoon.

Goodbye, August, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

Post beach shower is undefeated. Greatest feeling a human could experience. Throw a nap in there, and you will never touch serenity so close.

There’s poetry in walking away without closing the door too loud.

We really grew up in the best era to be a kid, and the worst era to be an adult.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Hey, if the Earth could stop air frying me, that’d be great.

I never knew how fast I could write until the teacher said pencils down.

You want me to sit in the back seat? The thing that killed JFK?

The main function of the little toe on your foot is to make sure that all the objects and furniture in the house are in the correct place.

When I say I’m Christmas shopping the “for myself” is silent.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Do people exist who manage to wash, dry, fold, and put away their laundry in the same day?

Stupid cow blocking the road. HOW DAIRY!

You’re my least favourite notification.

There’s a special place in hell for people like you (next to me).

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Might put on a bikini and run through your DMs.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Trying to work outside on a laptop is like sunbathing on a melting ice cube.

I was waiting on the universe but the universe was actually waiting on me.

Accidentally manifested an emotionally intelligent man that is hot and can cook. We’re currently staring at each other.

I put the “sexy” in “dyslexic.”

It’s okay to run away from the cops if you’re shy.

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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