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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

We need to stop making more Christmas music. We have enough.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

People who don’t like pickles are so important because they give me their pickles.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

Born to be quiet and mysterious, forced to yap whenever I get the chance.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

I am an influencer. If you aren’t influenced in any way, that is on you. Do better.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

The me who snips coupons needs to communicate better with the me who walks into the stores.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

Your twenties are for destroying and betraying yourself for nothing.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

Welcome to your 50s. You used to be a lot taller.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,855

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Discord:

Tattoos: because being an adult is hard, and I deserve to have stickers.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I only go for nature walks with people I can outrun.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Can someone write me a note to get out of being a responsible adult?

Freshly posted on YouTube:

The void screams into me.

Making waves on Snapchat:

Cleaning the kitchen, but saw the laundry, so I watered a plant, and now I’m making a dentist appointment.

Spotted on TikTok:

Another day on this hamster wheel to nowhere.

Broadcasted on X:

The healthy food in my fridge should be grateful really. It survives much longer than everything else.

Psychiatry is crazy because they’re just like… Oh, you’re really depressed? Would being on a pill that makes you fat help?

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Oh great, now I can be sad AND struggle to fit in my jeans 😂💊👖

being, crazy, depressed, depression, effect, fat, gain, health, help, humor, just, medication, mental, mental health, oh, pill, psychiatry, side, side effect, weight, weight gain

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I like my bed more than I like most people.

1 month ago

bed, comfort, humor, introvert, people, preference, relationship, sarcasm, sleep
Before the internet, going viral meant your drawing made it to the fridge, and your sibling was furious.

1 month ago

before, childhood, drawing, family, fridge, furious, going, humor, internet, meant, nostalgia, sibling, viral
All the clouds have come out to play today.

3 months ago

activity, cloud, clouds, fun, outdoor, outdoor activity, play, sky, today, weather
A McRib killed my tapeworm.

1 month ago

diet, fast, fast food, food, humor, joke, killed, McRib, tapeworm
People acting all happy and energized first thing in the morning. Chill out! You aren’t a Teletubby.

1 month ago

acting, chill, energized, happy, humor, morning, people, sarcasm, Teletubby, thing
I can’t believe I slept good all night. What a rush.

1 month ago

believe, good, humor, i, night, rest, rush, sleep, surprise

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Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

My favorite part of parenting is when they’re asleep.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

Changing my passwords regularly has certainly helped protect my accounts. Against me.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

Interrupt my sleep and I’ll interrupt your breathing.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

I think social media is marvellous. You type your thoughts into it, and then insane people let you know if they like them or not.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

I have never seen an alcohol company using a drunk person for any advertising, are they ashamed of their customers?

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

It was a complicated 17-hour surgery, but they finally managed to separate the art from the artist.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has bookmarked:

The way I see it, eating chips while I wait for my pizza to arrive is no different than ordering a starter in a restaurant.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

I don’t always have time to fold laundry, but when I do, I don’t.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

I don’t mind being the villain in your story because you’re a clown in mine.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

Food gives you energy to nap more.

Just shared via Discord:

Oh, to be a rich, beautiful woman in her big car, driving to buy overpriced groceries to stock up her breathtaking kitchen in her gorgeous house.

Shared recently on Twitch:

My cat’s in a bad mood, despite eating and sleeping all day.

Going bananas on Threads:

Every day I ask ChatGPT if it knows where my keys are and if it ever knows the answer, I’m suing everybody.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

My self-care routine is mostly just going to Mexican restaurants.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Psychiatry is crazy because they’re just like… Oh, you’re really depressed? Would being on a pill that makes you fat help?

I like my bed more than I like most people.

Before the internet, going viral meant your drawing made it to the fridge, and your sibling was furious.

A McRib killed my tapeworm.

People acting all happy and energized first thing in the morning. Chill out! You aren’t a Teletubby.

I can’t believe I slept good all night. What a rush.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Damaged inside, but outside we keep it gangsta.

Computer dating is fine, if you’re a computer.

Play your cards right and we could be wearing matching fanny packs this summer.

I miss getting my misinformation from less places.

Gonna spend today following my cats into the kitchen and meowing at them until they give me treats.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

The first time I heard “big naturals,” I thought it referred to major outdoor landmarks such as the Grand Canyon or the Great Barrier Reef.

Don’t put words in my mouth—that’s where the hot dogs go.

It’s not my job to police the internet, but I just saw someone post a recipe for a cauliflower cake, and I reported them for harmful content.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

He died doing what he did best, trying to get a croc to wear a Croc.

Apparently, throwing the remote against the wall didn’t help recharging the batteries.

I hope one day I will sleep before midnight like normal humans do. Every day I sleep tomorrow, even yesterday I slept today.

“Your password is too weak!” Just wait until you see my impulse control.

Traveling long distance without earphones feels like you’re serving a jail term.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

The female brain works like the internet. You can delete something, but it’s never really gone.

A real smartphone would know when to shut up.

I’m best man at my buddy’s second wedding. Is it appropriate to open my dinner speech with “Welcome back everyone”?

I have an addiction to pattern recognition.

Your secrets are safe with me. I wasn’t even listening.

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Psychiatry is crazy because they’re just like… Oh, you’re really depressed? Would being on a pill that makes you fat help?

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I like my bed more than I like most people.

Before the internet, going viral meant your drawing made it to the fridge, and your sibling was furious.

All the clouds have come out to play today.

A McRib killed my tapeworm.

People acting all happy and energized first thing in the morning. Chill out! You aren’t a Teletubby.

I can’t believe I slept good all night. What a rush.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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