Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
When I'm in incognito mode, I'm not hiding anything scandalous—just protecting my reputation as a supposed genius from questions like "Can fish blink?" 🐟🤔🔍

always, dumb, freaky, humor, i, incognito, incognito mode, internet, looking, me, mode, obvious, privacy, question, questions, record, search, shit, why

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Laying in bed with the nervous system of someone going to war.

0

1 month ago

anxiety, bed, going, laying, nervous, nervous system, sleeplessness, someone, stress, system, tension, war
Yeah, I’ll get up soon, I just need to look at the internet first. Yes, the whole thing.

0

2 months ago

delay, distraction, humor, i, internet, just, laziness, need, procrastination, thing, whole, yes
If the shampoo and the conditioner finish at the same time, one of them faked it.

0

2 months ago

bathroom, conditioner, conspiracy, finish, grooming, humor, joke, relationship, same, shampoo, time
You don’t know your own leg strength until you’re kicking the end of a hotel tucked bed sheet.

0

2 months ago

bed, bed sheet, end, experience, funny experience, hotel, humor, kicking, know, leg, leg strength, own, power, sheet, strength, unexpected, unexpected power
My co-workers found out when my birthday is so now I need to find a new job.

0

2 months ago

birthday, co-worker, coworkers, found, humor, i, job, need, new, new job, work, workplace
Hey, you wanna come to a wedding with me? You could be the groom.

0

2 months ago

date, groom, humor, humor quote, invitation, joke, me, social, wedding

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

14 shares on LinkedIn this month:

“November Rain” is just 9 minutes of me realizing I’m too dramatic to date someone with healthy coping skills.

34 shares on TikTok this month:

Why do men always think “looking for fun” means sex? Wat if I want us to draw?

63 shares on TikTok this month:

I may be ugly, but I used to be uglier.

27 shares on LinkedIn this month:

‘I love reading!’ says the woman who loves owning books.

92 shares on Slack this month:

I’m tired of pretending talking about the weather isn’t fun.

91 shares on Reddit this month:

Parents become grandparents and lose all their senses. All of a sudden, they got McDonald’s money now.

75 shares on Twitch this month:

I woke up, got out of bed, and had coffee. I think that’s enough for one day.

26 shares on Telegram this month:

I’ve already sent Santa a short letter this week to say hello. Not that he thinks I only get in touch if I want something.

22 shares on Reddit this month:

I like you so much, I’d actually learn your phone number.

61 shares on WeChat this month:

If you’re having a good day today, don’t play Wordle.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

If I was the inventor of healing, I would have made it linear, I can tell you that much.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

Just because I’m awake doesn’t mean I’m ready to do things.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

Nobody views your story faster than someone who doesn’t talk to you.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

Went jogging and came back after five minutes because I forgot something. Forgot I’m out of shape.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

If I buy the circus, the monkey will be the manager.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

My trauma is between me and this bartender. The rest of you, mind your business.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

There is always enough for the needy, there is never enough for the greedy.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

Holding back your sarcastic replies takes a lot of inner strength.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

Deleting dating apps to meet someone the old-fashioned way (in the HR department).

Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

I tried being the bigger person but all it got me was type 2 diabetes.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on TikTok:

If I was a star and you were a star, I would wink at you and blink at you and twinkle at you and the earthlings would call it science.

Spotted on YouTube:

I am physically, mentally and emotionally ready to enter a new phase in my life…. hibernation.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

A thing I never realized about being an adult is that you will always be cleaning your kitchen. No matter if you get takeout, no matter if you’re gone all day, you will be cleaning the kitchen.

Trending via Twitch:

Theo Von’s entire life is like a raccoon that visits New York City.

Just shared via Threads:

Oh my God, “unc” means uncool. I thought it meant uncle. Like you’re carrying the energy of someone’s weird uncle.

Just landed via WeChat:

If there’s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesn’t start while I’m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.

Just shared via X:

I told my psychiatrist I’ve been hearing voices lately. He told me I don’t have a psychiatrist.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I put the “sexy” in “dyslexic.”

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Me, unwrapping a gift: Oh wow, an item. I love these!

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Why is incognito mode always associated with freaky shit? I use it to search up very obvious questions, so there’s no record of me looking dumb.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Laying in bed with the nervous system of someone going to war.

Yeah, I’ll get up soon, I just need to look at the internet first. Yes, the whole thing.

If the shampoo and the conditioner finish at the same time, one of them faked it.

You don’t know your own leg strength until you’re kicking the end of a hotel tucked bed sheet.

My co-workers found out when my birthday is so now I need to find a new job.

Hey, you wanna come to a wedding with me? You could be the groom.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨