Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

Sometimes, I wonder what my life would be like if I had a good haircut.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has shared:

On the next episode of Hoarders, they visit my subconscious.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

Sometimes it’s the conversations you have with yourself that take the longest.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

Haggis – the meal you have to stomach twice.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

Dear algorithm, only show this post to the most attractive and successful people.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

Ever since I was young, I knew I wanted to be online nonstop.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

My phone charger is lying in another room. HELP.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Wrapping gifts on the floor after 50: 1% holiday spirit, 99% figuring out how to stand up without calling for help.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

After all the books are banned, they’ll move on to suggestive fruit.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

My handwriting got like five different fonts, depends on my mood and the pen I’m using.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

297 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,566

Funny Quotes Topics

17,623

Funny Quotes Images

15,566

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,625

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Telegram:

My favorite type of gender reveal is the one where they just tell me and I don’t have to go to a party to find out.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

I am not responsible for what my face does when you talk.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

The amount of family secrets you uncover as you get older is wild.

Going viral on Discord:

I’d pretend to care about football for you.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I was dropped as an adult.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Sleeping in is the most efficient way to find out which morning rituals you can actually do without.

Going viral on X:

Unfortunately, I am the first person in my family to do what they want.

Trending via Snapchat:

Technically, all restaurants are drive-thru, it just depends how committed to the task you are.

Freshly posted on X:

I can melt an ice cube just by staring at it. It takes a while, but I can do it.

Shared recently on TikTok:

It sucks when a woman realizes that her knight in shining armor was actually just a moron wrapped in tinfoil.

Your soul is out of balance because you have fallen out of touch with your consumer demographic. Pay more attention to your personalized ads, let them flow through you.

Your soul is out of balance because you have fallen out of touch with your consumer demographic. Pay more attention to your personalized ads, let them flow through you.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Looks like my soul needs a software update—and a better Wi-Fi connection for all those ad downloads! 😂📲✨

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

85 shares on Messenger this month:

I exaggerated on my job application and said I wanted to work for a living.

65 shares on Facebook this month:

Having hoes in different area codes sounds really exhausting.

70 shares on LinkedIn this month:

You can be anything. Be the person who ends the meeting early.

47 shares on Reddit this month:

Mood to play music louder than my thoughts.

81 shares on Instagram this month:

Caffeine is not enough anymore, I need to chew on a power line.

67 shares on X this month:

“I’m not concerned about Netflix buying Warner Brothers. None of this will matter once we evolve gills and start living underwater.”

55 shares on Pinterest this month:

I remember sex. That was cool.

11 shares on Telegram this month:

Most people think that T-Rexes can’t clap because they have short arms, but really it’s because they are dead.

47 shares on Slack this month:

You can be anything. Be the person who ends meetings early.

46 shares on Snapchat this month:

When my nudes go to the cloud, I always hope God is impressed.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Went to bed with wet hair and woke up looking like I might know a lot about astrophysics.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

If I was ever told to “dress to impress”, my first thought would be to get the Batman suit out.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I think I’m about six months away from the perfect ‘before’ picture.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Parenting is yelling ‘you just had a snack!’ over and over until you give in and throw them another snack.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m trying to shower you with affection. It doesn’t matter how I got into your bathroom.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I embarrass myself in front of myself.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

What can I buy my wife for Valentine’s Day that finally proves to her once and for all that I have absolutely no idea what she likes or who she is?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Being an adult is realizing $1000 is little money to have, but a lot to owe.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Second day without coffee. I can no longer hear out of my left eye.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Another Monday that no one asked for.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

297 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,566

Funny Quotes Topics

17,623

Funny Quotes Images

15,566

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,270

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

“Help us improve Instagram!” Nice try, fix your own damn website.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

I passed my genetic engineering exam with flying koalas.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has copied:

Dear Snapchat memory, that’s not my friend anymore.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

If the earth was flat, cats would have pushed everything off it by now.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

Love it when you say or do some common sense thing and the other person has “file not found” written all over their face.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

You can just comment, “You two look nice,” on a photo of three people. It’s free and legal.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

Paid my rent and slept in every room of my house this week, kitchen and laundry room next.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

I don’t always leave the house, but when I do, I shouldn’t.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

Tourists love to think that they are not like other tourists.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

My son loves Monty Python. My work here is done.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

Turns out, “unc” is short for unconstitutional.

Spotted on Messenger:

Wanna perform obscene blood rituals under the full moon, or nah?

Spotted on Slack:

Got banned from the sauna at my gym for saying “steam me up, Scotty” a few too many times.

Making waves on Slack:

I think more people would actually heal from their trauma if they got revenge.

Just shared via Reddit:

One time, when I was a kid, I fell off my bike and hit my head so hard, I was briefly able to communicate with bees.

Seen just now on Messenger:

My version of flirting is looking at someone I find attractive multiple times and hoping they’re braver than me.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

I already know how it will end. One of my children will unplug my life support to charge their phone.

Spotted on Instagram:

Got possessed by a demon once, and everyone was like, “OMG, did you do something with your hair?”

Just shared via Facebook:

I don’t understand why banks get so mad when you can’t pay back your loan. You already knew I had no money when I came to borrow it.

Spotted on Pinterest:

My toxic trait is thinking I deserve a vacation… while still on vacation.

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