Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

I don’t need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry!

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

Not everyone realizes this, but if you clean the pile of receipts out of a purse and stack them together, it makes a teeny tiny book about why you’re broke.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

Being gracefully insane is the secret to staying somewhat sane in an insane world.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

We’re in the middle of a snowstorm with no cake in the house. I never expected to perish like this.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

Twitter is great because you can get good life advice from other emotionally unstable adults.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

In case no one told you today. I’m beautiful.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

There is certainly no life on other planets. Otherwise our government would have sent money there long ago.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

If someone leaves your life, it’s often because the actor playing them is getting cancelled in the real world.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

Why can’t they use deep fake technology for good instead of evil? Like taking Zoom meetings for you, stuff like that.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Being bi means you say both yay and bruh.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,597

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Coworker: Where are you going after work? Me: Away from you.

Just landed via Threads:

You’d be surprised how many times you can use the word succulent in a work email.

Going viral on Slack:

Is it too late to reset my life back to factory settings?

Live now on Instagram:

There is no sex. I lied. You are gonna lay here and take personality quizzes with me.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Those guys holding fish in their dating profile pictures are just demonstrating how they’ll carry you over the threshold after marriage.

Broadcasted on X:

I love when people find out I meant every word I said.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Even on the coldest of days, there’s such peace found in the warm embrace of a hot pizza.

Going viral on Slack:

The only hot singles in my area are in my wallet.

Making waves on Threads:

If you’re curious what the priciest item in a store is just bring a kid along because they’ll definitely find then break it.

Spotted on Instagram:

Movies in the 80s had me convinced that a main part of being a grown-up was staying late at the office and eating Chinese takeout.

Being naked with headphones on is so fun.

11 hours ago

Playful quote about enjoying the fun of headphones and being shirtless.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When you need to feel both free and plugged in at the same time 🎧😆🎵

being, casual, fun, headphone, headphones, humor, music, naked, relaxation

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

39 shares on Messenger this month:

I say “long story short” and then tell the story with bonus features.

96 shares on TikTok this month:

Lost another rap battle by just agreeing with everything the other guy said.

20 shares on WeChat this month:

You will be having the worst morning of your life and then someone will start mowing their lawn.

85 shares on Pinterest this month:

There aren’t enough hours in the day for me to do absolutely nothing.

60 shares on Facebook this month:

Someone was saying that social media makes you miss out on your real life, but have you seen real life?

59 shares on X this month:

Iced coffee and crying, the most Californian afternoon.

92 shares on LinkedIn this month:

People really be like, “I would never do that to you,” and then do it with a remix.

56 shares on Slack this month:

There are many people who don’t like me and I am one of them.

38 shares on Messenger this month:

People pleasing doesn’t go well with my black attire.

97 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I think the real reason this generation is so angry is that their music sucks.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Your card declining when you know you have money is a very funny experience.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

At the art museum walking slower and observing more than anyone else.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Making things weird is probably the only thing I’m good at.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

You don’t scare me. You’re not those two minutes when I can’t find my wallet.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

The smarter you are, the more important it is for you to figure out how to think less.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t worry, darling, you won’t break me. Someone already beat you to it.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Good morning to life’s chaos, where my coffee is the only thing that makes sense!

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Remind the demons under your bed that you’re the landlord, raise the rent.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I will not accept a hint. I will act dumb until you say it clearly to me.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

The worst part of all-you-can-eat buffets are all the witnesses.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,736

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

They should invent a weekend that goes by slowly.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

Shazam, but for whatever the hell goes on in the apartment upstairs.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

Life isn’t funny, why should my posts be?

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

Opposites often not only attract each other, they often also undress each other.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

I dunno what I did in a past life but holy crap I’m sorry.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

Chasing after a ping pong ball is wildly dehumanizing.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

Do people who do triathlons know that they don’t have to?

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

Cheers erupt as woman cuts into perfectly ripe avocado.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

When I was a young boy, the doctor told me I had a lazy eye. By the time I was 50, it had spread to the rest of my body.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

When I get the vibe from someone that fitting in is super important to them my first instinct is to bite them.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Pinterest:

Twitter is the only place where well-articulated sentences still get misinterpreted. You can say “I like pancakes,” and somebody will say, “So you hate waffles?”

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

A big F*** YOU to people driving small cars and pulling deep into parking spaces so I think I have a spot until the last second.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I’m not lazy, I’m an inactivist.

Shared recently on TikTok:

I hate it when I’m singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong.

Seen just now on Discord:

Horrifying if literal: my girlfriend is a gym rat.

Going viral on WeChat:

The only reason I’d want to go to heaven is to complain to the manager.

Breaking via Facebook:

I highly recommend having hobbies. It distracts you from things like falling in love.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Hello, my voicemail is currently unavailable. To leave a message please speak slowly and clearly into the nearest toaster.

Going viral on WeChat:

Eat like your treadmill is watching.

Spotted on Twitch:

Don’t forget to be mean to strangers on the internet today, for no reason whatsoever.

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