Idea: An app that tells you where that bruise came from.

Idea: An app that tells you where that bruise came from.

Commentary:
"Introducing the 'Bruise Detective' app – for those moments when you wake up with a bruise and can't remember if you're a secret ninja or just clumsy 🕵️‍♂️💥 Mystery solved, one bruise at a time! #BruiseDetective"

I have entirely too many new bruises for someone who isn’t getting laid.

I have entirely too many new bruises for someone who isn’t getting laid.

Commentary:
Well, those bruises must have quite the active social life if they're not from getting lucky in love!