Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

Don’t ask me ‘how are you?’ unless you’re willing to sign an NDA.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

Stop asking a clown why he keeps acting like a clown, ask yourself why you keep going to the circus.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has shared:

I’m trying to quit making sexual innuendos but it’s so hard.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

One year closer to whatever age my obituary will say.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

Women are like a fitted sheet. No matter what you do or how hard you try, they just never seem to cooperate.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

My wife is napping quietly and the villain of this story is about to be this sneeze.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

God knew I would be too powerful if I had conversation skills.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

I once made a joke to a coworker, and she said, “It was the funniest thing I ever said,” and suggested I post it. It got 10 likes.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

Sometimes you just need to eat shredded cheese straight out of the bag.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

I have no issue with people talking in the morning. But not with me, please!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,356

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Slack:

Dear everyone. Upset, bored, angry or hungry. I’m here for you. Sincerely, fridge.

Trending via Telegram:

If I sing “Hello” and you think of “Lionel Richie” and not “Adele,” then you can probably predict the weather with one of your knees.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Wonder if I should do something with my life, or kind of just continue to hang out.

Just landed via Discord:

Hey, boy, are you the worst-case scenario? Because you’re all I think about.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Boy, did The Shining nail what it’s like being an only child.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Maybe your dog is barking at my luggage because he doesn’t enjoy his job, officer.

Just landed via Telegram:

Is the elephant in the room with us right now?

Spotted on Snapchat:

Garlic and bread is the only marriage I truly have faith in.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

It’s called single sign-on because you have to do it every single time.

Just landed via WeChat:

It’s crazy windy today. Trash is blowing everywhere, so watch out for your ex.

Funny conspiracy theory quotes

Funny conspiracy theory quotes 🕵️‍♂️💬 bring a hilarious twist to wild ideas and secret plots! Whether you’re a skeptic or a believer, these witty lines will have you laughing while questioning everything 🤯😂. Perfect for sparking a fun debate or just brightening your day with a dash of mystery and humor 🛸😜. Get ready to dive into the quirky side of conspiracies!

New funny conspiracy theory quotes 👇

All funny conspiracy theory quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

68 shares on Snapchat this month:

Sunsets and women are undoubtedly God’s best creations.

54 shares on Threads this month:

Of course babies cry when flying, their entire understanding of planes centers around them being eaten.

97 shares on Slack this month:

If she has Bukowski on her nightstand, she will devour you.

48 shares on Discord this month:

For International Women’s Day, I’m going to celebrate by hitting every curb I see.

11 shares on WeChat this month:

I need to figure out what I’m going to wear to the couch on New Year’s Eve.

32 shares on Instagram this month:

No plans and no pants kind of day.

68 shares on WeChat this month:

My boyfriend moved in with me straight from Hotel Mama. In a way, I’m now a single parent.

31 shares on Twitch this month:

Super quick question: does anyone know what the point is?

24 shares on Snapchat this month:

The 5 seconds in the morning, when I don’t yet know who I am, is the best time of the day.

90 shares on Instagram this month:

Sometimes, u just gotta clean your room and apply an elaborate skincare routine, and pretend that’s equivalent to getting ur life in order.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Why do my fully charged AirPods deplete at different rates? Do I listen harder out of one ear?

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I probably never die because I don’t finish anything without a specific deadline.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

As a beautiful woman, sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is “ew.”

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you wanted.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Santa punched a hole in my wall because I left him soy milk.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

You never forget your first kiss. Or your first meeting with HR.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Cartoons make it look like getting stabbed in the butt with a pitchfork would be no big deal, but I beg to differ.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Imagine you get to the gates of heaven and they make you download an app to go in.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

The reason I don’t trust polls is because the people being polled are people who willingly answer the phone when an unknown number is calling them.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m waiting for the perfect moment to stop procrastinating.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,519

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

Bon Jovi must be at least 3/4 of the way there by now.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

Changing your mind is an underrated activity.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

I forgot to take my meds so I’m looking forward to joining the squirrels in the tree to talk politics.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

Arguing through text will have you standing in one spot for 40 mins.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

Sorry I’m late, I got here as soon as I wanted to.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has bookmarked:

Actors in black and white movies were often putting their lives in danger during driving scenes, as they weren’t able to tell if the traffic light was red or green.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

Interviewer: Why do you want to work in customer service? Me: Well, I’m really good at apologizing for things that aren’t my fault.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

Are you gonna confess your undying love for me or what, bro?

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

Naps hit different when you’re using them to avoid being alive.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

I know everything is expensive right now, but just remember correcting people’s grammar online is still free.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Getting a key tattoo, but getting it covered up with a doormat tattoo, so no one ever finds it.

Live now on Reddit:

Humidity is great because then people think it’s not my fault that my hair looks like this.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

I miss phone booths. We used to train our immune system in those things.

Breaking via Threads:

I love to watch the enthusiasm of new coworkers, and then their inevitable slow descent into not giving a damn.

Broadcasted on Discord:

You told your cat how much you love him, but now it’s morning, the sun is out, you’re sober, and it’s just weird for both of you.

Going viral on Discord:

Sorry, I had to cancel plans. The prophecy said so.

Shared recently on Threads:

If you get injured playing peekaboo, you end up in the ICU.

Trending via WeChat:

If she reads Bukowski, she’s not looking for love. She’s looking for someone who will ruin her creatively.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I’ve been asked to join a swingers club, but I’m a little nervous. What if I’m not good enough? I haven’t been on a swing since I was 9.

Making waves on Twitch:

One minute you’re young and fun and the next, you need a tow out of a beanbag chair.

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