Commentary:
"Protecting your data… I mean, genes, with double the security! 🔒👶 #SafetyFirst #TechSavvyParents"
51 Funny control quotes
Airports should have tattoo parlors for those of us with long layovers and poor impulse control.
Commentary:
"Who needs duty-free shopping when you can leave the airport with a new tattoo and a permanent reminder of that impulsive decision? 💉✈️ #TattedTraveler #YoloLayovers"
“Your password is too weak!” Just wait until you see my impulse control.
Commentary:
"Your password is too weak? Just wait until you see my impulse control 😂💪 #AllBarkNoByte"
I lost my job at NASA Mission Control today. I misheard when they said, “It’s lunch time.”
Commentary:
Looks like someone's passion for space was out of this world, but their lunch radar was a bit off! 🚀🥪 Next time, remember: fueling your stomach is just as important as fueling rockets! Keep shooting for the stars, and maybe pack a snack for the journey. 😉
I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control. I thought to myself, “Wow, this changes everything.”
Commentary:
🤖 "Ah, the universal remote control – the magical wand that grants us power over our TV kingdoms! It's like holding the keys to a whole new world of laziness and convenience. Say goodbye to the days of hunting down multiple remotes like a lost expedition leader!" 📺🔮
You can’t boss me around. You’re not my bladder.
Commentary:
"Sorry bossy pants, but you're not in charge here – my bladder calls the shots! 💁♂️🚽 #BladderPower"
Not many quicksand-related deaths since the 1970s. Thank God the authorities got that nightmare under control.
Commentary:
Looks like quicksand finally got a grip on itself and thought, "Maybe drowning people isn't the way to go." 😅🌪️ Thank goodness for those authorities – saving lives and boots one step at a time! 🙌🏻👢 #RIPQuicksandVictims
I always preferred the English spelling of “diarrhea” which is “diarrhoea” because it really looks like you’ve lost control of your vowels.
Commentary:
"Ah yes, the English spelling of 'diarrhoea' truly gives the impression that your vowels are on the loose! 🤣🇬🇧 Watch out, those vowels are running wild! 🏃♂️💨 #LostInTranslation"
Whoever’s been in charge of the weather for the last few weeks seems to have fallen asleep on the couch with the remote control in their hand.
Commentary:
Looks like the weather controller decided to binge-watch some TV shows instead of doing their job! 🌦️😴 Next time, they might want to set an alarm ⏰ before they snooze off on us! #WeatherFail
Sorry I said your toddler should be in commercials for birth control.
Commentary:
"Whoops, my bad! Looks like I accidentally walked into a parenting nightmare! 🙈 Maybe stick to using their charm to sell ice cream instead? 🍦😂"