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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

My neighbor is having some kind of party and didn’t invite me. I guess I have to call the cops again.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

I’m planning to save money on Christmas gifts this year by wrapping up all the toys my toddler dropped behind the couch.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

My dream car is a taco truck.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

If I were God, I’d tell everyone that I created the animals and that I don’t know what happened after that.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

Maybe dogs are smarter than us because they found a way to get fed and housed without having to go to college and get a job.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

You look like you can go as yourself for Halloween.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

I thought you are the sunshine of my life, but you are just a meteor trying to destroy my world.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

There are two classes of travel: first class and with children.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re searching “Thanksgiving recipes that won’t cause heartburn.”

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

Baby for sale. Refuses to wear shoes.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,928

Funny Quotes Topics

13,900

Funny Quotes Images

10,928

Updated

3 minutes ago

Users Online

3,437

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Telegram:

I don’t mean to brag, but I put together a puzzle in 1 day and the box said 2-4 years.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

A house doesn’t have to be haunted to scare me, I’ve seen the listing prices.

Reported on X:

Women aren’t complicated. Just give us attention and leave us alone.

Making waves on Twitch:

My favorite 90s skill: Uninstalling my car stereo and hiding it in my glove box in under 15 seconds.

Just landed via Reddit:

If I could go back in time, I’d probably stop Bruce Willis from saving us from that asteroid.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I feel bad for Slash. He bought a goofy hat in like 1986 and now he has to wear it until the day he dies.

Trending via Slack:

Relationship status: he escaped.

Just shared via YouTube:

All the wrong decisions in this country are based on the fact that my balcony faces out the back and so I can’t speak to the people.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I took my kids to the zoo when they were small, I wonder how they are getting on now.

Shared recently on X:

All income is disposable if you’re brave enough.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,928

Funny Quotes Topics

13,900

Funny Quotes Images

10,928

Updated

3 minutes ago

Users Online

3,416

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Savannah is one of the only girl’s names that’s also a significant “biome”.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

No one is more hated than those two people who start a standing ovation.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Traveling long distance without earphones feels like you’re serving a jail term.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

If you were a dinosaur, you’d be a Gorgeousaurus.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

I have a condition where if I don’t walk as fast as humanly possible wherever I go, I will die. I’m like the bus in Speed.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

They should invent someone who holds me.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

I love when women move on. It’s my favourite genre.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

Sometimes it’s not a secret, it’s just none of your business.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

This Christmas, get her the gift that’ll last a lifetime. Give her a tortoise.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

I used to party all night. Now I check the weather forecast for the next day to see if it’s a good laundry day.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Discord:

One of the top features of squirrels, for me, has got to be that squirreliness.

Trending via TikTok:

Without freedom of speech we wouldn’t know who the idiots are.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I have good problem solving skills, but my problem creating skills are where I really shine.

Going viral on Instagram:

Can we not just call it Zealand now?

Breaking via Instagram:

Everyone is posting their vacation pictures and I’m like… I went shopping.

Seen just now on Threads:

Stomach: I will now demonstrate a blue whale’s mating call.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

How bad can a decision really be if nobody from the future shows up to stop you?

Making waves on Discord:

Did you know electronics need smoke to work? Once the smoke comes out of them, they stop working.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Going to the gym to exercise my demons.

Breaking via Threads:

I miss phone booths. We used to train our immune system in those things.

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