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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

I’m not old, I’m vintage.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

Lately, when I meet new people, I ask them what their hobbies are instead of what they do for work, and let me tell you, the conversations have been absolutely top tier!

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

Whenever I’m not eating a breakfast sandwich I wish I was eating a breakfast sandwich.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

We like to vilify hot people, but it’s important to know that people who aren’t hot are also terrible.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

How come it’s called “thrift store shopping” instead of Goodwill hunting?

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

“You live and you learn!” Bro, I don’t want to do either of those things.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

I want to live in a world where TV sitcoms have catchy theme songs again.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

If you were the birthday gift I bought my wife some months ago, where would you be hiding?

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

When Chuck Norris was born, the doctor got slapped.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

Couples who finish each other’s sentences have killed before and will kill again.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2414 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,576

Funny Quotes Topics

15,246

Funny Quotes Images

12,576

Updated

36 minutes ago

Users Online

3,442

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Reddit:

Multitask? I can barely unitask.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Short men store so much anger in their little body.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I start each day assuming it will be horrible and go from there.

Just shared via WeChat:

Your in his DMs, I’m on Etsy paying a witch to put a spell on him.

Just shared via Telegram:

Got possessed by a demon once, and everyone was like, “OMG, did you do something with your hair?”

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Things can feel really overwhelming. Sometimes days or even weeks can get really hectic. Don’t forget that life is all about getting as much phone time as possible. Never lose sight of that.

Just shared via Slack:

Life hack: Confuse your doctor by putting on gloves at the same time he does.

Just shared via Facebook:

I’m off to club bed, featuring DJ Pillow and MC Blanky.

Breaking via Discord:

The lion does not concern himself with Microsoft Teams.

Shared recently on Telegram:

People said follow your dreams, so I went back to bed.

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Funny disposal quotes

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All funny disposal quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2414 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,576

Funny Quotes Topics

15,246

Funny Quotes Images

12,576

Updated

36 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Unfortunately, I do enjoy watching the downfall of people who did me wrong.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

If you wear enough cardigans, people will assume you’re smart and you can stop reading entirely.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

I didn’t really feel old until my doctor hit me with the “at your age…”

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

I bet the inventor of the cannon would be relieved to know that they’re mostly about t-shirts now.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

Lawyers should get walk-up songs in court like how wrestlers do.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

I take offense when people don’t invite me to events l’d like to turn down.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

I’m not getting fatter. I’m increasing my content.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

Runners who smoke need to pick a side.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

“You look tired.” Yes, bro, I stayed up all night obsessing over things I have no control over.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

Sometimes I say “huh,” then answer the question before you can repeat your question.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Twitch:

Well, maybe grass should touch me for once. How about that?

Reported on WeChat:

I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that you’re an expert on my life and how I should live it! Please continue while I take notes.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Why do babies stare at you like they know you from somewhere?

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

When someone giving me directions says, “You can’t miss it,” I would love to tell them just how wrong they were if I could find my way back to them.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

I would only enjoy the Met Gala if at the end of that runway they all walked into a volcano.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I don’t always leave the house, but when I do, I shouldn’t.

Making waves on YouTube:

Please go out, have fun, have friends, make connections. That mysterious lifestyle won’t save you.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

I’m so tired of not being a multimillionaire.

Reported on Pinterest:

Y’all need to stop marrying people who look just like you do but with a wig on.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Nothing worse than realising you vented to the wrong person.

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