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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

The little umbrella is so unnecessary. Like, my drink is already wet, bro.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

I’m drinking coffee so I don’t say mean things to you. You’re welcome.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

“She’s so self-centered”—who’s supposed to be the center of my life? You?

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

How many calories does an audible sigh burn? Because I don’t think my Apple Watch is giving me credit for them.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

It’s called Boxing Day because you’re supposed to spend it eating boxes.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

For the first time in history, you can simply post “He’s an idiot” and 90% of the world will know whom you’re talking about.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Drive as I say, not as I drive.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has viewed:

Twitter is fun because you can post a pic of pizza and people will get mad at you.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has shared:

All the observable evidence suggests that, if I was much worse at my job, I’d be more likely to get a promotion to senior management.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

Would have started saving money in kindergarten if I knew my life was like this.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

241 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,510

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,510

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,662

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on TikTok:

I don’t want to end this year on bad terms with anybody. Could you please apologize to me?

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

This post ain’t gonna like itself, damn.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Sorry I lied when I said “I can’t complain.”

Going viral on Facebook:

Nobody bools anymore. In high school, everyone was booling.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Please stop assuming that too many em dashes mean AI written. Some of us are producing grammatically incoherent work the honest way!

Going viral on Messenger:

Going to all the Halloween parties this year as the Invisible Man.

Spotted on Messenger:

Humans can accomplish so much, unless it’s parking at a shopping center during the holidays.

Just landed via Discord:

My husband and I were doing yard work, but I started a fight so I could storm off into the air conditioning.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Nothing is funnier than seeing how angry someone gets when they realize they can’t manipulate you.

Just shared via Reddit:

Sunday is my favorite day where I pretend I’m going to do something productive.

Funny eviction quotes

Funny eviction quotes bring a lighthearted twist to an otherwise stressful situation 🏠😂 Whether you’re moving out or just need a laugh, these witty lines turn packing up into pure comedy gold 📦🎉 Get ready to smile, chuckle, and maybe even share a few with friends facing the big move! 😎✨ #MovingOn #LaughItOff

New funny eviction quotes 👇

All funny eviction quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

29 shares on TikTok this month:

My signature move is waving at someone who is waving at the person behind me.

79 shares on Telegram this month:

If history is repeating itself, when can I buy a pet dinosaur?

41 shares on Facebook this month:

“There are lots of benefits to working here. We have fun social events and activities after work!” And what are the benefits?

90 shares on Snapchat this month:

One day you’re young and carefree, and the next you have a favorite stove burner.

40 shares on Messenger this month:

I could win awards for having a bad memory. In fact, I probably did. How would I know.

74 shares on Telegram this month:

It’s a good thing that our phones only convey sight and sound. No offense, but from most of you I would never want to receive a smelfie!

42 shares on TikTok this month:

When the moon hits your eye like it’s 5:45, that’s November.

55 shares on YouTube this month:

“You’re so quiet.” Thanks, I’m not comfortable around you.

59 shares on YouTube this month:

Every day when I get home, I thank my cats for allowing me to live in their house.

62 shares on WeChat this month:

I hope my parents feel proud. They scared me so bad about getting pregnant as a teenager that now they’re never getting grandkids.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

For Christmas, I’d like to be understood.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Expecting your first baby’s exciting, but have you ever ordered a new coffee machine?

13 folks are currently checking 👀

So a baby crawls across the floor to it’s bottle and it’s cute but when I do it Im in need of an intervention?

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Dropped my skinny boyfriend between the bed and the wall like a vape or a TV remote.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I have a mental illness that makes me think that people will change their minds if I present the correct arguments with the appropriate facts and data.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Adulting’s a total scam. Bills, taxes, and a laundry pile that breeds in the dark, were not in the brochure!

21 folks are currently checking 👀

If a door closes, you can just open it again. That is a door. Doors work like this.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Why count sheep when I can count my troubles?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

My husband sure has a lot of opinions on which movie he’s gonna sleep through.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Clearing her mind with a brisk walk along the foggy shoreline.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

241 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,510

Funny Quotes Topics

17,577

Funny Quotes Images

15,510

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,571

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

“I asked ChatGPT.” “I asked Grok.” I asked God to strike me dead with lightning.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

There are no adults in the room. The cavalry is not coming. Everything was built by people no smarter than you.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

I’m just falling in love with my problems now. Maybe they’ll leave me too.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

Not eating the cookie I’m craving. I better wake up skinny tomorrow.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has viewed:

I need to know the brand of toothbrush my neighbor has. I hear it buzzing sometimes an hour at a time and she’s clearly enjoying it.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

Gen Z will be like “OMG new life hack!” and then it’s a video of them adjusting the toaster dial.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

Before social media, you could just completely forget that somebody existed. Good times.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

Tuesday is just another Monday, but reheated.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

“Try it all before you die” is always drugs and sex, never quantum physics.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on YouTube:

You ever get into such a weird mood you have to put yourself on house arrest for a couple days?

Going viral on Telegram:

I’ll see you in court (at the marriage registry) (I love you)

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Sticking googly eyes on a potato and introducing him to everyone as my new boyfriend.

Just shared via TikTok:

“Fries or salad?” sums up every adult decision you have to make.

Live now on Snapchat:

Therapy isn’t enough. I need to be electrocuted and get my memory erased.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Getting to the age where I’m like, “Oh, hopefully I’ll be dead by then.”

Live now on Facebook:

I miss when we didn’t know what celebrities thought about anything.

Breaking via Reddit:

Not now darling, mummy’s influencing on the www.

Just landed via Discord:

They should invent someone who holds me.

Trending via Twitch:

Tom and Jerry fooled me into thinking dogs bullied cats when it’s the opposite in reality.

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