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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

We are gathered here today because our ancestors didn’t have condoms.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

Beavers are also just otters that have learned carpentry.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

The key to happiness: 1/ order a pizza. 2/ eat that pizza. 3/ repeat!

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

My fight or flight response has frequent flyer miles.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

Who else here can say that they have NEVER watched any of the Kardashian shows?

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

“Left alone” would have been the right answer as a child to the question of what I wanted to be when I grew up.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

It’s okay, wobbly chair, I’m unstable too.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

When you see a squirrel, you’re bound to say, “Awww, a squirrel!”

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

Good morning to everyone except the baristas who don’t tighten the lid.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

The masculine urge to make a woman sit through a YouTube video that she will not find funny or entertaining.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

816 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,978

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,978

Updated

56 minutes ago

Users Online

3,432

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WeChat:

When I was little, I didn’t care what I wore. I just went along with what my parents chose. When I look in old photo albums, l realize that they didn’t care either.

Shared recently on Twitch:

A Jackie Chan fight scene where he’s in an IKEA warehouse and he fights off dudes with furniture pieces, but by the end he’s accidentally assembled it all into a complete Malm bedroom set.

Going viral on TikTok:

Waiting for toast to toast takes forever unless you walk away for 10 seconds, then it burns.

Broadcasted on Slack:

You don’t scare me. I used to have to call and ask a girl’s parents if she was there.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

We are both insane on the web, I think we can make it work.

Making waves on Messenger:

Sorry I’m late, there was bubble wrap.

Just shared via YouTube:

A lot of y’all don’t understand politics because your history teacher was the football coach.

Going viral on Facebook:

If you’re a mad scientist, put a note in your laboratory reminding you to sometimes be a happy scientist.

Shared recently on Reddit:

At this point of my celibacy, I can see the same colors as mantis shrimp. What do you know about blorange and gurple?

Shared recently on Threads:

Job interview: Where do you see yourself in five years? Me: Hopefully on a sabbatical.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

816 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,978

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,978

Updated

56 minutes ago

Users Online

3,437

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

Remember, if you start with, “It’s crazy to think…” you can say whatever you want.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

Is ChatGPT down for anyone else? I’m a neurosurgeon in the middle of brain surgery.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

The enemy of my enemy is my friend. But I’m my own worst enemy, so I guess I’m also my best friend.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

Unfortunately, I am not nonchalant, I will set myself on fire.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

11:00 am – Anything is possible. 3:00 pm – But not today.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has shared:

I don’t need the audio tour at the museum, I have my teen to provide critical commentary the entire time.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

Toast doesn’t talk. How do you know it’s French?

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

Handing the bus driver a $50 bill and telling him “Just drive”.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

January 1st: anything is possible. January 2nd: but not today.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

Autocorrect changed ‘are you around?’ to ‘are you aroused?’ and my buddy didn’t want to hang out today.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on YouTube:

Rain cancels plans, upsetting some and delighting others.

Making waves on Facebook:

Apparently, telling your friends not to stress about their wedding because “it’s your first marriage” is not the right thing to say.

Breaking via X:

Hug your children as often as you can. They can’t break things during this time.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Maybe there’s an alternate universe where onions cry when they chop up humans, you don’t know.

Spotted on TikTok:

Hey man, just wanted to reach out and say I loved how much you drank at my wedding last night.

Live now on Facebook:

My plumber asked me for a Google review. I said I thought it was a really good search engine and I’d give it 8/10.

Breaking via Twitch:

I told my wife to embrace her mistakes. She gave me a hug.

Just shared via TikTok:

I’ve mastered farting, and it be loud and quick, but the key is don’t make a face or look around, so people can’t pinpoint it to you. Just act natural.

Spotted on Messenger:

Gonna finish eating all these Christmas cookies so I’m no longer tempted to eat them.

Breaking via TikTok:

Apparently, when you treat someone the same way they treat you, they get offended!

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