Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

Haggis – the meal you have to stomach twice.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

The first five days after the weekend are the worst.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

I really love how squirrels get extra chubby heading into winter mostly because it’s super relatable.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

This year, the feliz is not navidading.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

I purposely overcook my holiday turkeys so I don’t have to hear anyone at the table say, “moist.”

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

The problem with “treat yourself” is that I don’t know how to stop. I had a bad day in March, and I’ve been treating myself ever since.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

A delivery driver just asked for my date of birth. I said, “94.” He replied, “Is that 1994?” Oh, sorry mate, no. My bad, that was 1794. Right around the French Revolution.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

What’s wrong, babe? You’ve hardly touched my mixed signals.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

A fun wedding bit is to sit next to a random guest, point to the bride or groom & whisper, “it should’ve been you”

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

Becoming a DJ, but only because I like to impose my will and preferences upon the masses.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Jan 19, 2026

3,432

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Telegram:

Being drunk and liking every tweet without reading it.

Spotted on Facebook:

There’s a word in modern Hungarian slang, egérmozi, which describes watching films (or shows) on your phone. It means “mouse cinema”.

Shared recently on Threads:

Some of you are out here driving like your turn signal’s free trial ended and you’re all out of blinks.

Shared recently on Discord:

Interesting people are my favorite endangered species.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I just love the lack of privacy in the pharmacy line. Just standing there shouting out my name, date of birth, and exactly what is wrong with me for the world to hear.

Going viral on Discord:

I hate having a body, it’s so high maintenance. Shower this, eat that, drink this, sleep that, it’s all very stupid.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I’ve skipped midlife crisis and gone straight to birdwatching.

Trending via Discord:

So rude to come up with solutions to my excuses.

Seen just now on Threads:

When I get married, I want my wedding video to be filmed like it’s an episode of The Office. I want camera zooms, eye contact, side commentary— all of it.

Live now on Snapchat:

The only hot singles in my area are in my wallet.

Funny Greg quotes

Funny Greg quotes bring a burst of laughter 🎉 and unexpected wit 🤪 to brighten your day! Whether you need a quick mood lift or a hilarious icebreaker 😂, Greg’s unique humor never fails to deliver. Dive into these gems 💎 and get ready to share some chuckles with friends. Warning: side effects may include uncontrollable giggles and spontaneous smile attacks! 😄✨ #FunnyGreg #LaughterBoost

New funny Greg quotes 👇

All the leaves are brown. And this guy is Greg.

2 months ago

brown, Greg, guy, humor, leaf, nature, observation
I’m not saying Lois Lane is a bad investigative journalist, but my friend Greg didn’t wear glasses to work yesterday and I recognized him by lunch time.

2 months ago

bad, friend, glasses, Greg, humor, i, investigative, investigative journalist, journalist, lane, lois, Lois Lane, lunch, recognition, saying, time, wear, work, yesterday

All funny Greg quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

76 shares on Reddit this month:

What are cats even trying to do?

23 shares on Facebook this month:

Every triangle is a love triangle when you love triangles.

95 shares on Facebook this month:

Hey dude, I recently became omniscient, and well, you fell off in every universe.

88 shares on WeChat this month:

Books are so cool because there are no bloody ads in them.

11 shares on Messenger this month:

If you accuse me of yelling, you will start to hear yelling so you can note the difference in the future.

75 shares on Twitch this month:

One day you burned a CD for the last time and didn’t even realize it.

50 shares on Telegram this month:

I typed my name into Google’s search bar and it immediately auto-filled to “Doesn’t even listen to instructions” before crashing under the weight of disappointed search results.

49 shares on YouTube this month:

My career plan? Win the lottery and disappear.

12 shares on Snapchat this month:

You know you don’t have to give your bathroom a beach theme, there’s no law.

44 shares on YouTube this month:

Why is it cute when a baby falls asleep clutching a bottle. Yet, when I do it, it’s “concerning”?

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

And for my next trick, I will appear to know what I’m doing.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

The more you embrace your crazy side, the more fun life becomes.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Be the horrifying lore of your family’s lineage.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Just said “shitted feet” instead of “fitted sheet” in front of my my son and his friends. If you need me, I’ll be in the closet.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

If every day is a gift, today is socks.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

The way some people hold their cell phone to make a call, I always think they’re trying to take a bite out of a sandwich.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Life’s too short to remove the USB drive safely.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

We were supposed to have flying cars and other cool stuff, but instead we have AI videos showing Michael Jackson eat at McDonald’s.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

You befriend a guy and a few days later he’s like “I wanna talk to you about something”. Please, God, let it be about the economy.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Deleted old Tweets just in case I date a very famous woman with rabid fans.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 19, 2026

Users Online

3,518

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

How old is older? Because I’m still waiting for this wise thing to kick in.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

I hate when people tell me I need to “get out of my comfort zone,” like I don’t even have a comfort zone; I am literally always uncomfortable.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

Rare earth, this rare earth, that. There’s nothing more rare on this earth than affordable housing in a walkable neighborhood.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

I was in Paris with a boyfriend once and he lit a candle in Notre Dame in order to ask God to raise the price of Bitcoin.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Urgh. Trying to buy a copy of Catch-22 online but the seller won’t post it until I’ve paid and I won’t pay until I’ve received it.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

I hate to slut-shame, but a lot of you are not slutty enough.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

Why the hell is it called the restroom? I am fighting for my life in here.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

I miss being able to study with complete focus for hours. Now I read one sentence and check my phone to see if penguins have legs or just feet.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

Shout out to everyone who cooks at 180°C for 20 minutes, no matter what the instructions say.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

Doc, if I can vibecode anything and everyone else can vibecode anything, then what’s my competitive advantage?

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Snapchat:

Every time I leave the house, I’m reminded why sweatpants exist.

Trending via Reddit:

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here doing an epic air-drum solo to ‘In The Air Tonight’.

Going bananas on Reddit:

I hope Google never goes down. I know like six, maybe seven, things.

Seen just now on TikTok:

How do I get recruited by a cult? I need some direction in my life.

Breaking via Telegram:

The phrase “Treat yourself” has ruined my bank account and waistline.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

It’s always “you’re so cute when you’re mad,” until the house is on fire.

Spotted on Threads:

If a demon ever possessed me, I’d just sit back and say, “Your problem now.”

Freshly posted on Discord:

I read somewhere that playing white noise helps you sleep better, but I didn’t find country music helpful at all.

Breaking via Threads:

Outfit repeater. Meal repeater. Movie rewatcher. I know what I like.

Just landed via Telegram:

I love routine. Until I’m bored, then I love excitement. Until I’m overwhelmed, then I love routine.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴