Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

I don’t pay attention to the world ending. It has ended for me many times, and began again in the morning.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

Not to be a nerd, but a well-placed semicolon is hot as hell.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

When you realize your punishments as a kid (stay home, take a nap, no junk food, go to bed early) are now your goals as an adult.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

Rage bait often works on me because I was already angry before I read that.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

“The average CEO reads 52 books a year.” Yeah, because they’ve got nothing else to do.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

Twitter is for people who tried suffering in silence and realized it wasn’t for them.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

Life can be so beautiful, you just can’t get sober.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

Sometimes I don’t worry about things at all and other times I am awake.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

My favorite pirate song is “Aye of the Tiger”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

300 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,569

Funny Quotes Topics

17,627

Funny Quotes Images

15,569

Jan 11, 2026

3,287

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Foot fetish should just be called feetish.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Sure, my internet service is overpriced and spotty but you can’t put a price on unintentionally being dropped from every Zoom meeting.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Let’s play a game called you bring me food and I eat it.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Blocking isn’t enough, I hope your pillow never has a cold side.

Spotted on TikTok:

No haunted houses for me this year. If I wanna be frightened, I’ll just look at my 401k.

Spotted on Slack:

I’m now at the age where happy hour is a nap.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Asking myself if that was too weird after I hit send.

Making waves on Threads:

Someone needs to invent a kid that listens the first time.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Telling my boss I wasn’t drunk really backfired. I probably should have waited until he asked.

Seen just now on Slack:

Diarrhea awareness week starts today. Runs through Sunday.

Funny handwritten quotes

Funny handwritten quotes bring a splash of humor and personality to your day ✍️😂 Whether doodled in notebooks or scribbled on sticky notes, they turn ordinary words into quirky smiles 😜✨ Perfect for brightening up your feed or adding a cheeky twist to your messages, these playful scribbles prove that laughter really is the best ink! 🖊️🎉

New funny handwritten quotes 👇

Not now, I’m befriending a crow and teaching it how to deliver handwritten love notes.

2 months ago

activity, befriending, bird, communication, crow, funny activity, handwritten, handwritten note, humor, love, love note, note, notes, teaching
Girls expect handwritten letters from guys who copy birthday wishes from ChatGPT.

2 months ago

AI, birthday, birthday wish, ChatGPT, copy, dating, expectations, girls, guys, handwritten, handwritten letter, humor, letter, letters, technology, wish, wishes

All funny handwritten quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

40 shares on Discord this month:

When my nudes go to the cloud, I always hope God is impressed.

55 shares on X this month:

I’m officially at the age where my favorite thing to do is sit down.

72 shares on Discord this month:

Honey, get in the car. We have to go to the store because we’re retarded, and it’s Christmas Eve.

77 shares on Discord this month:

I don’t mind being fully naked or my top half being naked, but I hate being naked from the waist down only. This is why I could never be a cartoon duck.

58 shares on Reddit this month:

Golf is a great way to learn all of the new curse words your subconscious has been cooking up in the lab.

39 shares on Discord this month:

Are you gonna call me beautiful today, or do I need to go to the gas station?

58 shares on Twitch this month:

Sleep when the baby sleeps, eat when the baby eats, work when the baby works.

34 shares on Telegram this month:

I have the patience of a nearly ripe avocado.

44 shares on Discord this month:

Not gonna lie, I just assume everyone is AI now.

37 shares on TikTok this month:

Can’t, I’m raging against the machine.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Might start signing off emails with, “But what do I know.”

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Juggling screen time is the ultimate multitasking Olympics.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t have bad handwriting, I’m just using my own font.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Great minds think alike, but so do stupid ones.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I want to be cuddled, but I also want to be left alone. Being crazy is hard.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

My role at Thanksgiving dinner is to Blair Witch it alone in the corner.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Digging my own grave, because I gotta do everything around here.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

If your wife uses “I” it means she will be doing something. “We” means you will be.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

If you ever feel like something’s missing in your life, it’s probably me.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

That’s me in the corner, that’s me using Microsoft Word, losing my revision.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

300 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,569

Funny Quotes Topics

17,627

Funny Quotes Images

15,569

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,374

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇺 has shared:

I can relate to the stock market because I am always about to crash at a moment’s notice.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

It’s really important to stay hydrated at work, so you can take as many 10-minute-long bathroom breaks as possible.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

I don’t do exercise because one time I kneed myself in the face doing a burpee.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has bookmarked:

My spirit animal is that bird that knocks itself unconscious flying into windows.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

I have officially reached the age where I am bothered by lights being on, doors left open, loud noises, and people.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

Behind every funny man is a woman who rolls her eyes.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

Due to financial reasons, I will now be performing photosynthesis.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

AI could never steal company time the way I do.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Funny that the Three Wise Men brought probably the three worst presents for a newborn baby.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has shared:

Sometimes I say something so embarrassing I even impress myself.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Bottle of Worcestershire sauce tipped over in my fridge. The mess is unpronounceable.

Just shared via Facebook:

Blackout curtains are dangerous, because it’s 1 p.m. outside and 1 a.m. in here.

Going bananas on X:

Sorry I was late, I was disassociating in the shower.

Going bananas on Reddit:

I was gonna kiss you under the blood moon eclipse, but whatever, bro.

Making waves on Discord:

Look, babe, I’m sorry. If your fake British accent keeps being this geographically inconsistent, I’m going to have to cancel the medieval roleplay sex.

Freshly posted on X:

Whoever has my voodoo doll, please make it study.

Going viral on Reddit:

Don’t let anyone treat you like pond water. You are Fiji water, okay?

Seen just now on WeChat:

Not today, Satan, but next week works.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

If alcohol damages your short-term memory, imagine what alcohol can do.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Stretching isn’t enough. I need to be able to disassemble my body like Legos.

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