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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

Holiday dinners with family are like real life boss levels with the worst loot.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

“We told you to stop at 2012!” – The Mayans

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

I am awake. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

My age no longer permits me to suffer for love, so if you see me sad, it’s due to lack of money.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

If you have an opinion about my life, please raise your hand. Now put it over your mouth.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

I’m looking for a moisturizer to hide the fact that I’ve been tired since 2010.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

Gordon Ramsay is making us dinner. It’s a four curse meal.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

I’m retired. I was tired yesterday and I’m tired again today.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

The question of whether an employer values its employees is sometimes answered by the toilet paper.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

Dress for the demons you want, not the demons you have.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

787 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,949

Funny Quotes Topics

13,921

Funny Quotes Images

10,949

Updated

1 minute ago

Users Online

3,432

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Facebook:

Many people mistake me for an adult because of my age.

Spotted on Messenger:

The clitoris has 8,000 nerves, if you gonna get on my nerves, get on one of those.

Freshly posted on X:

Life hack: if you run out of treadmill space for your clothes, get a piano.

Spotted on Slack:

Companies post open positions online and then ask you why you applied to them.

Just landed via Telegram:

That awkward moment between birth and death.

Just shared via Messenger:

I mostly choose to stay silent in weird situations but my face has subtitles.

Trending via YouTube:

I’m only an introvert until I meet people worth extroverting with.

Live now on Telegram:

Sometimes I think I should talk to my colleagues more often. Until I talk to my colleagues.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

The adult version of “head, shoulders, knees and toes” is “wallet, glasses, keys and phone.”

Breaking via Discord:

I heard you like bad boys. Well, I’m bad. At everything.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Trending Topics 📁

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

787 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,949

Funny Quotes Topics

13,921

Funny Quotes Images

10,949

Updated

1 minute ago

Users Online

3,424

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

Just washed my windows and not a single bloke came out and said ‘You can do mine next!’ This used to be a real country.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

I tried to clean up my Chrome tabs but it turns out all 200 of them contain information that is vital for my survival.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

I don’t drink blood to stay young. I do it mainly for the lifestyle.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

A general rule of parenting: if you’re having a great day, the day isn’t old enough yet.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

I keep my mind active by worrying.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

I haven’t worn a trench coat since a random man in his 60s said to me “what are you looking for, detective?”

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

You never realize how long a minute is until you’re exercising.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

Ain’t no girls in my messages, just a bunch of verification codes.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

“What’s a random act of kindness you’ve done for a stranger recently?” I helped a bunch of teens buy alcohol and cigarettes the other day.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

Telling your child their sibling is still asleep a very effective way to get them to practice their instrument.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Messenger:

That urge to nap between 3pm – 5pm is no joke.

Going viral on TikTok:

A drone, but for seeing which fast food drive-thrus have the shortest line.

Spotted on Discord:

Hold on, I just need to take off my glasses and put my face in my hands about it first.

Live now on Pinterest:

So, if I take out a reverse mortgage on my house does that mean I’ll own a bank after 30 years?

Trending via Snapchat:

I’ve never been married, but I tell people I’m divorced so they won’t think something is wrong with me.

Just landed via WeChat:

There should be significant punishments for people at the grocery store with no spatial awareness.

Trending via Telegram:

I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and all I find is ingredients.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Sex is great, but have you ever started slowly picking up speed after sitting in a traffic jam?

Going viral on WhatsApp:

My toxic trait is destroying my room every time I get dressed.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

How is it still this week?

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