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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

I like when the rain is misty and you get to feel like a grocery store broccoli for a little while.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

I got fired for telling customers if they wanted “smoking or non-smoking”. Apparently, the correct term in the funeral home business is “cremation or burial”.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has copied:

Sometimes all you need is a Saturday to sleep, eat, and do absolutely nothing else all day.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

I eat my first meal of the day in the afternoon, bro. Don’t ask me for advice.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

Technology has really helped me waste my time efficiently.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

I think carefully about what I’m going to say and I still manage to say the wrong thing. It’s truly a gift I have.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

Eating spaghetti to forgetti my regretti.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

Excuse me sir, are you going to finish that existential crisis?

Someone from 🇲🇽 has downloaded:

Guns N’ Roses: “Welcome to the jungle!” The jungle: “No more humans, please!”

Someone from 🇵🇬 has bookmarked:

“You look happy.” Thanks, I stopped dating.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,660

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

The hottest part of sex is when I take off my glasses and put them in a safe place.

Breaking via Messenger:

I have a sundress and no man to bend me over in it, sad day.

Just shared via Twitch:

Monday is already sending me threatening glances from across the room.

Just shared via YouTube:

I was going to do some yoga today, but had a donut instead.

Spotted on X:

I live in my own little world. But it’s ok, they know me here.

Live now on Discord:

The only thing I love more than an open mind is an open bar.

Just shared via Twitch:

Straight man stuns they/them by ordering in fluent woke.

Seen just now on Slack:

I’m not drinking 2% milk until we figure out what the other 98% is.

Just shared via Facebook:

Soccer: I love when they hold up the sign and a brand new, beautiful boy takes the place of a dirty, sweaty, ruined one.

Just shared via Messenger:

My boss doesn’t want dogs in the office. But he didn’t say anything about alpacas.

Funny hygienist quotes

Funny hygienist quotes bring a smile 😄 to the dental chair and brighten up those pearly white moments! 🦷 Whether you’re a pro with the floss or just love a good chuckle while scrubbing teeth, these witty gems keep oral care light and entertaining. Get ready to giggle 😂 and appreciate the quirks of dental hygiene like never before—because laughter is the best toothpaste! 🪥✨

New funny hygienist quotes 👇

All funny hygienist quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

88 shares on TikTok this month:

Too young to retire, too poor to quit and too fat to strip – so let’s move on.

46 shares on Messenger this month:

Please stop adding touchscreens to cars. Most of these idiots can barely drive as it is.

63 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Show me another rule so I can break that one too.

41 shares on WhatsApp this month:

A gentle reminder that if your birth year starts with a 19, you should consider wrapping the Christmas presents on a table, and not on the floor.

95 shares on WeChat this month:

There are people on TV who are not ruined by fame, but who ruin fame.

63 shares on Threads this month:

It’s so funny how you can meet someone randomly online, and they become such an important part of your life. It’d be nicer if they lived closer, though.

16 shares on Discord this month:

“What fresh hell is this?“ It’s actually the same hell as yesterday. Not fresh at all, really.

74 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Uninstalling Instagram can increase your IQ by 10%.

35 shares on Facebook this month:

They should go crazier with lab-grown meat. Invent some new animals or something. Mammoth burger.

78 shares on Instagram this month:

I am convinced that size matters, especially when it comes to the heart.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

5 folks are currently checking 👀

My ducks are not even remotely in a row. My ducks are in places no duck has ever gone before.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t like the person I become when my boss tells me I should be working while at work.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

A big part of my job as a parent is moving things away from the edges of countertops.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

You can just comment, “You two look nice,” on a photo of three people. It’s free and legal.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry I’m late. Had to scroll back to my birth year.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m just impressed by how ugly I’m willing to look in public these day.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

“Who does she think she is?” Well, it appears she is someone living her life unconcerned with who you think she is.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Dating someone from Twitter is like choosing your spouse from a mental hospital.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve done literally nothing all day, except feel guilty about doing nothing all day.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

What’s wrong, babe? You hardly touched your own advice you give to others.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,582

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

Wanna know a real adult life hack? Don’t tell anyone when you have a day off. Absolutely no one.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

The porn bots liking my posts from years ago is just reminding me that I’ve always been hilarious.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

Why does the phone ring longer when you’re ignoring the call?

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

It would be nice to see basic human decency make a comeback.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

Overthinkaholic!

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

It’s wild that “Jason” is a name from ancient Greece, because it sounds like it was invented in Florida in 1983.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

Fishing for compliments like “I’m a mess in this photo that I took all morning to get the right angle and filter and after 50 selfies this is me”.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

I get sad whenever they’re mean to Zoidberg in Futurama.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has downloaded:

The Scream movies were believable in the ’90s, but no one with any common sense answers unknown numbers on their phones anymore.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

My ex thinks I’m with someone else, someone else thinks I’m with my ex, everyone wonders where I am. Here I am. Just enjoying my own life.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WeChat:

Enjoying the consequences of my actions.

Trending via Telegram:

It’s crazy I need a certificate to prove I was born when you can literally just look at me.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Wife is temporary. Being the hot EX is forever.

Just shared via Threads:

(Flirting) What’s every single thing you’ve ever thought?

Just landed via YouTube:

Being shy is so annoying. Why is my chest hurting me, because I need to speak in public?

Broadcasted on YouTube:

McDonald’s needs a 3rd window so you can trade in all the wrong stuff they gave you.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Too poor for Ozempic but too undisciplined for strict diet and exercise. Is there a secret third option?

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Due to personal reasons, I will be screaming into a pillow.

Spreading quickly via X:

Bands who can’t afford a smoke machine should hire my wife to cook at their concert.

Trending via Pinterest:

I’ve got a headache, and it’s affecting my entire future.

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