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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

Please don’t buy my book on reverse psychology.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

We could all be hibernating right now but noooooo we have to be “adults” with “responsibilities”.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

I be like, “Awwwww cows,” and then go and eat two double cheeseburgers, lol.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

My kids think I’m going to miss them when they leave for college, but I’ll be busy drinking my coffee while it’s still hot.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

I can’t believe someone ran over my neighbors loud motorcycle tomorrow morning.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

You are not in a situationship. You are texting a man who doesn’t like you.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

I have decided to purchase the grocery store because it is now cheaper than the groceries inside it.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

Pressure washing is like regular washing but with a lot of yelling and tight deadlines.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

Sorry, I can’t today. I have to sit in my room and make matters worse.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

I wish every day had 30,000 hours, and that I had unlimited Adderall and was unemployed.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,554

Funny Quotes Topics

16,782

Funny Quotes Images

14,554

Updated

Nov 27, 2025

Users Online

3,649

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WeChat:

If you would just let me help, you’d be in an even worse position than you are now.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I’m always in a rush to go home, and do absolutely nothing.

Just shared via Discord:

Goodbye, August, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.

Just shared via WeChat:

That’s not fat. It’s bonus content.

Going viral on TikTok:

Thanks to AI, some of us went from being told by our parents not to trust the internet to having to tell our parents not to trust the internet.

Just landed via WeChat:

I saw a spider crawl under my kid’s bed and was too tired to go after it, but that’s okay, no living creature can survive that environment.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Everyone is getting pregnant or married, and I’m back to “What’s your favorite color?“

Trending via Threads:

Being an adult is a little out of my price range right now.

Just shared via Messenger:

Are people born with photographic memories or do they take time to develop?

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re searching “Thanksgiving recipes that won’t cause heartburn.”

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,554

Funny Quotes Topics

16,782

Funny Quotes Images

14,554

Updated

Nov 27, 2025

Users Online

3,567

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

I’ve never met a problem I couldn’t make worse.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

I think my dog always follows me to the bathroom because I always follow him outside and he thinks that’s the way it works.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

When people block me, I just assume it’s for my rugged good looks and killer jawline.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

Don’t forget to tell yourself more lies today.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has shared:

I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

Dinosaurs are always described as “roaming” the earth, which is patronizing as hell, I bet they had places to go and important shit to do.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

If he doesn’t like your fruit puns, you need to let that mango.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

Sorry, I’m late. I took a walk around the world to ease my troubled mind.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has shared:

I like when the rain is misty and you get to feel like a grocery store broccoli for a little while.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

I’ve named my couch American Idle.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Returning to Twitter is like coming back to a dysfunctional family.

Just landed via Telegram:

I’ve started ripping my shirt in half like Hulk Hogan when I mean business. Long story short, I’m looking for a new job.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Doggystyle, so we can both look at the river.

Live now on Instagram:

Nothing bores me like twins who don’t look alike, you should’ve just dropped later if you’re not going to participate.

Freshly posted on Slack:

As a teen: secretly drinking in the park with friends. As an adult: secretly drinking in the park with squirrels.

Broadcasted on Threads:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but your clothes are still in the washing machine.

Live now on Telegram:

If you accuse me of yelling, you will start to hear yelling so you can note the difference in the future.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Everyone is using AI to write business emails, texts, etc. At this point in time, we may as well just tell our AIs to talk to each other and then let us know what kind of deal they worked out.

Shared recently on Facebook:

The fact that I have a lot of wine in the house proves that I don’t drink much. Otherwise the wine would be gone.

Spotted on Discord:

Stop expecting people to be as cool as you, it’s a recipe for disappointment.

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