Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Imagine if we had to worry about dinosaurs too, on top of everything else.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

All the best memories with my dad start with “Don’t tell your mom about this.”

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

Not being able to fall asleep is so embarrassing. All I’m asking my brain to do is nothing and it can’t even do that?

Someone from 🇬🇩 has bookmarked:

I like to push myself out of my comfort zone by sometimes sitting on the other end of my sofa.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

A treadmill minute is four times as long as a sleep minute.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

“Don’t shoot your gun at the hurricane” the government says. I’ll do my own research, thanks.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has downloaded:

I’ve never found a “Remember Me” checkbox that works. Nothing remembers me.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

I alway get the same thing every year for Christmas. Fat!

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

Last night my guardian angel came to me, covered me up, gave me a kiss on the forehead and whispered in my ear: “You’re a pain in the ass!”

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

God, never seen San Francisco this bad. Spiderwebs completely covering entire business, skeletons just strewn about sidewalks in every neighborhood. Things have got to change!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,486

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

If you’re a dude and you’re having a bad day, just remember, no one cares.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

He just walked right into my heart and switched on the lights.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

If the Christians published the Kama Sutra, it would have been one page long.

Just shared via WeChat:

My husband loves when we fight, and I turn it into a limited series called And Another Thing.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Diplomacy is the art of sending someone to hell in such a way that they look forward to the journey.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Who you are before you have your coffee is the real you.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

There’s nothing I hate more than a failed nap attempt.

Making waves on X:

Never understood why people train their dogs to sit pretty or roll over when there are useful tricks like empty the dishwasher or fold the laundry.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Being gracefully insane is the secret to a happy life.

Spotted on Threads:

The person opposite me has a donut. I do not have a donut. That should be my donut. This person is now my arch nemesis.

Funny mark quotes

Funny mark quotes 😂 are the perfect way to spice up your day with a dash of wit and charm! Whether it’s about life’s quirks or clever observations, these gems 💎 never fail to bring a smile 😄. Ready to laugh out loud and share some clever vibes? Let’s dive into the world of humor where every mark tells a story with a twist! 🎉✨

New funny mark quotes 👇

I spend all day on Facebook so that Mark Zuckerberg can eat.

6 days ago

activity, day, eat, Facebook, humor, i, internet, internet activity, life, mark, Mark Zuckerberg, media, online, online life, social, social media, spend, tech, tech humor, zuckerberg
You know the nap is good when it left you marks.

1 week ago

good, humor, mark, nap, rest, sleep

All funny mark quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

10 shares on Threads this month:

I think something is so beautifully wrong with you.

26 shares on Instagram this month:

Socialism is like polio, it comes back when people forget about the horrible damage it did last time.

12 shares on Twitch this month:

We must all do our part for the planet. The other day I unplugged a row of electric cars nobody was using.

20 shares on Telegram this month:

My favorite part of Spring is its rolls.

94 shares on Reddit this month:

The greatest allies fascism and genocide have are the people who say, “I don’t follow the news, it’s too depressing.”

80 shares on Snapchat this month:

Vegans will look you dead in the eye and tell you cauliflower tastes like ribs.

32 shares on Slack this month:

I don’t always listen to Metallica, but when I do, so do my neighbors.

81 shares on Reddit this month:

Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

37 shares on Twitch this month:

Normalise following up to an ignored email with “helllooooooo?”

86 shares on Pinterest this month:

Being insane should at least burn calories.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

They lie on the job descriptions, so lie on your resume.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

I have this epiphany every night that I need to turn it up a notch.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

White elephant: Nothing brings people together like fighting over absolute garbage.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Extroverts love our energy. That’s why they suck it out of us.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

If you can’t handle me at my weirdest, then leave, because it gets weirder.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

I love icebreakers. They really give me time to anxiously reflect on what the most fun fact about me is, while I don’t listen to anyone else at all.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

As a teen: secretly drinking in the park with friends. As an adult: secretly drinking in the park with squirrels.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

If you did the weekend right, your coffee needs coffee today.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

I miss them days if you couldn’t rap, you didn’t.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Idea: An app that tells you where that bruise came from.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,741

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇯 has copied:

Your annoying online persona has captured my heart.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

Why do women complain about size but moan when fingered?

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

I know life can be tough, but you still gotta wear deodorant.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

If I had a dollar for every time someone called me fat, I’d probably just spend it on more bacon.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Okay, new plan, I’m going to marry a Kardashian.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

In my retweeting era, because I’m just speechless.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has viewed:

Hey boy, are you my washing machine? Because neither of you know how long 10 minutes last.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

Find someone who looks at you the way I look at a cheeseburger.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

A spoonful of peanut butter from the jar will fix me.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

Her: how are you still single? Me: it’s easier than you think.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Instagram:

My self-care routine is mostly just going to Mexican restaurants.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Thought I would mix things up today and sit in a new spot on my couch. Absolute chaos over here.

Going bananas on Threads:

Call me a glitch, cause I’m definitely messing with your system.

Going viral on Messenger:

I could have done without braces back then. What’s the point of having perfect teeth if I have no reason to smile?

Making waves on Instagram:

First date idea: you rescue me out of the tree I got stuck in while looking through your windows.

Spotted on WeChat:

Been whispering “I like invented her” about my newborn every few hours.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

It sucks when you realize it’s only Thursday, until you realize it’s only Wednesday.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Used shampoo containing caffeine. My hair is already on its way to work.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Had chicken and egg for dinner because I wanted to eat the whole family.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

People who play golf don’t concern me nearly as much as the people who watch it.

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Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴