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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

The devil couldn’t reach me so he made sure my love life was bullshit.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

The only narcissist I allow in my life is my cat.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

Unless I say otherwise, I am always tired.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

All my life lessons were learned by watching people who took my advice.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has viewed:

If Spotify has taught me anything, it’s that I don’t know the correct lyrics to any of my favorite songs.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

We all just kind of accept it as normal that we have a meat tentacle living inside of our mouth.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

I’ve started taking a brisk walk straight after dinner and it’s saving me an absolute fortune on restaurant bills.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

I hope the next time you’re stressed, it’s because you’re choosing between Japan, Bali, Switzerland, or the Maldives.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

Happiness is when you really have nothing to do with people you want absolutely nothing to do with.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

This cucumber Gatorade got me quenched in an unprecedented manner.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,685

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Twitch:

Once again I feel like I slept in a washing machine.

Making waves on Telegram:

I did vote once but only because I thought the line was to a buffet.

Broadcasted on X:

Honestly, I don’t think I have any more new passwords left in me. You wanna steal my identity? Go ahead, I hope you enjoy debt and terrible posture.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Line dancing was created by women waiting to use the restroom.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Is it healthier to drink tap water and let the fluoride calcify my pineal gland or drink bottled spring water and let micro plastics settle in my balls?

Just shared via Discord:

Went to an antique show and people started bidding on me.

Just landed via Instagram:

I followed my heart, and it led me to the fridge.

Going bananas on Twitch:

I never wanted to become one of those adults who just find the music of the younger generation annoying. Nobody could have guessed that the music was just annoying.

Just landed via Twitch:

I’m not saying I need glasses. But today I watched a bunny in a meadow until it flew away.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Asking for a donation like Wikipedia every time someone asks me a question.

Funny Narcos quotes

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All funny Narcos quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

22 shares on Facebook this month:

Your twenties are for working towards a life you later won’t want.

83 shares on Snapchat this month:

If you don’t fall in love with me, I’ll write poetry about you and then you’ll regret it.

85 shares on Discord this month:

Life hack: You don’t need white noise to sleep when you have constant ringing in your ears.

76 shares on WhatsApp this month:

You should be able to like an email instead of replying to it.

97 shares on X this month:

People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.

60 shares on Messenger this month:

For Halloween, you should be mine.

31 shares on Slack this month:

According to a study, people believe anything that starts with ‘according to a study’.

18 shares on Reddit this month:

Oh my God, “unc” means uncool. I thought it meant uncle. Like you’re carrying the energy of someone’s weird uncle.

54 shares on Discord this month:

Adulthood is realising no one cares about you, and the show must go on.

77 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Every day I tell myself, “You got this,” and every day, “this” gets weirder.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Get married and have kids so that you can Google things like “How to teach your kid to not bite”.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Who needs a period calendar when I know I’ll have it when I’m crying over nonsense things.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Gravity called. It’s sick of holding me up.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Maybe Rome was built in a day. I wasn’t there.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

There must be an opposite of suicide, where someone suddenly and radically decides to start living, and rescues their own life from meaninglessness.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I would like to be reincarnated as less tired.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

WW3: I can’t fire my weapon unless I first watch a 15-second unskippable ad for Raid Shadow Legends.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Is it too late to reset my life back to factory settings?

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing more rude than taking a photo of yourself and it looking like how you actually look, and not how you look inside your head.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Remember that your face is literally a combination of hundreds of generations of people who fell in love!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,444

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

Excuse me, can you direct me to the nonsense?

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

The older I get, the more I realize being in a hurry is a terrible way to live your life.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

We’re all just a bunch of addicts, struggling with our drug of choice.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has copied:

Sometimes the laugh is funnier than the joke itself.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

Them: Good morning! Me: Where?

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

Why is sugar SO addictive, and broccoli is just like, “I’ll be here when you need me”

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

You don’t read Dostoevsky. You survive him.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

Sorry, I wasn’t really listening but that’s awesome, unless it isn’t of course.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has copied:

You say “multitask” like it’s a good thing.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

If I don’t text you saying Happy New Year, we still gang, I’m just lazy.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

Before Google, if you didn’t know something you had to go ask someone and most of the time they couldn’t help you, and now that’s also how Google works.

Seen just now on X:

Sometimes the laugh is funnier than the joke itself.

Spotted on Messenger:

She’s got style. She’s got grace. She dropped her cellphone on her face. She’s a lady.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I’ve been a main character since birth.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Hairless cats look like the devil screwed up a possession.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

I don’t have a new year resolution, you don’t need that when you’re perfect.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I’m 6 donuts away from being the elephant in the room.

Live now on YouTube:

College is literally just you, your laptop, and your water bottle against the world.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Have you tried complaining about it?

Just shared via Telegram:

You know the trouble with real life? There’s no danger music.

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