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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡ฆ has downloaded:

In six days God created heaven and earth. On the seventh day, in the interests of balance, the BBC interviewed Satan.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฐ has downloaded:

Like, who are those little paper umbrellas trying to protect?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡จ has shared:

Surround yourself with people who google the menu of the restaurant beforehand.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฑ๐Ÿ‡บ has viewed:

For Halloween, you should be mine.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has bookmarked:

I feel like we’re on like the 50th or 60th horseman of the apocalypse by now.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฉ๐Ÿ‡ฒ has copied:

Dark mode changed me. White screens now feel like staring into the sun.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ญ has copied:

Your 20s are for lusting after furniture you can’t afford actually.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ฟ has shared:

Letโ€™s all stand up against iron deficiency (but not too fast).

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿ‡บ has viewed:

Gravity, at all times, is trying to pull your pants down.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ด has bookmarked:

My favorite thing to do when I see people I know in public is to pretend I didnโ€™t.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,876

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Spreading quickly via Threads:

I already want to come home from work tomorrow.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

โ€œPeople you may knowโ€ and itโ€™s someone I would set on fire.

Going bananas on Messenger:

I love when women move on. Itโ€™s my favourite genre.

Just shared via TikTok:

Every grocery store becomes an escape room if you see someone you know.

Seen just now on Slack:

My life coach traded me.

Live now on YouTube:

Guess I’ll be getting the same thing for Christmas, again. Fat!

Spotted on YouTube:

I remember when a computer didn’t automatically connect to the internet, it used to make a screaming noise. We should have listened.

Freshly posted on Slack:

My passport probably thinks I’m in prison.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Peak delusion is believing that a paragraph will make someone treat you better.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Netflix shouldโ€™ve just maybe mailed us all this fight on DVD.

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Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

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Social Media Stars โญ

71 shares on YouTube this month:

You havenโ€™t experienced proper anger until you have a sister.

78 shares on Slack this month:

I love when certain people post their dating app convos, and you get to see what a conversation between two really boring people looks like.

83 shares on Slack this month:

If you’re going through hell, keep going.

86 shares on Slack this month:

Life is really sucking the life out of me.

67 shares on Twitch this month:

One of the weirdest things about being an adult is having a favorite stove top burner. No one ever talks about it, but y’all know it’s true.

52 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I forgot to turn my clocks back and, oh my God, you guys are not going to believe the stuff that happens in the next hour.

65 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If women came with instructions, men wouldn’t read them anyway.

91 shares on Twitch this month:

A vibrator is amazing but it doesn’t call me โ€œgood girlโ€ unfortunately.

88 shares on Messenger this month:

I made a graph showing my past relationships. It has an ex axis and a why axis.

35 shares on Threads this month:

Getting accused of using AI when you didnโ€™t is like this centuryโ€™s version of a witch allegation.

Trending Topics ๐Ÿ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes ๐Ÿ’ฅ

8 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Headed to a wedding but my wife said Iโ€™m not allowed to refer to the bride as โ€˜the veiled threat.โ€™

9 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Hanging out with a couple and saying, โ€œMay this love never find me,โ€ every time thereโ€™s a slight conflict.

14 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Apologize for the job that you do. It would be nice if you were talented too.

11 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

I don’t understand why it isn’t socially acceptable to choose to be nocturnal. The angry hot sky ball is gone, my internet is fast, everyone finally shut up, what’s not to like.

5 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

We should start referring to age as “levels.” So when you’re level 80, it sounds a lot cooler than just being an older person.

25 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

A piece of chocolate contains just enough energy to take another one.

13 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Sorry I canโ€™t carpool to work. Thatโ€™s the time I use to angry scream.

15 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

Can’t say “I’m tired” without my mom making it a competition of who is the most tired and who has more reason to be.

17 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

โ€œHope this email finds you doing well!โ€ The email found me, therefore I am unwell.

15 folks are currently checking ๐Ÿ‘€

My housemates are convinced our house is haunted. Iโ€™ve lived here for 274 years and not noticed anything strange.

Funny Quotes Data ๐Ÿค“

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

4,055

Activity Log โœจ

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฟ has bookmarked:

Saying โ€œshut upโ€ before skipping the YouTube ad is literally necessary.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ท๐Ÿ‡ด has shared:

At my funeral, sit me up so I can see whoโ€™s talking to my man.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ณ has copied:

Why is everyone looking for intelligent life in space? Can we please start on Earth first?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ช has downloaded:

I canโ€™t believe we became the adults in the most unaffordable period in history.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฉ has viewed:

Major cheat code in life: ask for the big, unreasonable thing. The universe meets you at your level of audacity.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฉ has shared:

The point of life is going to a good restaurant and getting two cocktails with dinner. Thatโ€™s it.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฉ has shared:

Sex makes you happy. So I understand your dissatisfaction.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฟ๐Ÿ‡ฆ has copied:

Before you have kids, ask yourself: how patient am I with really stupid people?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡ช has downloaded:

The one nice thing about your friendsโ€™ divorces is no one invites you to them.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฏ๐Ÿ‡ต has bookmarked:

Never underestimate the healing power of a grilled cheese sandwich.

Social Media Log ๐Ÿ’ซ

Making waves on TikTok:

If you’re a dude and you’re having a bad day, just remember, no one cares.

Going bananas on X:

The thumbs up emoji is a nice way to tell someone not only did you receive their message, youโ€™re also done with the conversation.

Making waves on Facebook:

Cats are smarter than dogs. You canโ€™t get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.

Going viral on Telegram:

This year is starting to feel like it needs to be left outside until we see if it can act right.

Spotted on Threads:

Facebook should just go back to being Hot or Not dot com.

Making waves on Facebook:

People keep wishing January was over like the worst month of the year isnโ€™t coming up next. Thats like wishing someone would stop arguing with you and just punch you in the face.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Horoscope: You will give blood generously this week, but it wonโ€™t be your idea.

Making waves on Slack:

There are people who leave comments on porn videos.

Seen just now on Discord:

Itโ€™s cold and dark outside, made me think of you.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Imagine applying for a job, then not picking up calls from random numbers.

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