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Wow, this sounds exactly like the "Deep Thoughts and Sprint Out" teaching style! Now I know why students are always running out of the classroom. 📚🏃‍♂️😂

class, education, ending, hello, homework, humor, i, leave, lecture, main, movie, only, point, professor, reach, reading, right, sarcasm, student, timing, yell, yelling

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78 shares on LinkedIn this month:

When you’re sad, find two equally sad friends and form a cryangle.

34 shares on Messenger this month:

The art of staying somewhat sane in an insane world.

67 shares on WeChat this month:

Never underestimate the healing power of a grilled cheese sandwich.

10 shares on Snapchat this month:

I want my house spotless, but kicking my kids out seems wrong.

48 shares on Twitch this month:

My mental health walks make my mental health worse because I live in a shithole.

23 shares on Pinterest this month:

Going to the beach the day after watching Jaws hits different.

74 shares on Pinterest this month:

Getting a nose ring, so I don’t lose my keys.

89 shares on Snapchat this month:

My plan is to die young as late as possible.

50 shares on TikTok this month:

The medicine for headache goes to the stomach to do what, exactly?

87 shares on Threads this month:

Since it’s impossible to know which period of my life is the middle, I’ve decided to have an ongoing crisis.

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Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

Pressure washing is like regular washing but with a lot of yelling and tight deadlines.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

Sure, you can invite more people to the plans we made 2 months ago. The more, the merrier. Also, I’m not going now.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

Well, at least my cat is supportive of me doing less and laying around more.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

Many years ago, I stood up to 100-200 million others only to sit in meetings now.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

Fasted for 72 hours and gained the ability to whisper to bats.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

Why there is always a kid crying when I go to the store? Dude, you aren’t the one paying for it. Stop!

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

Need to clean the fridge, so I’m going to do the responsible thing and drink wine instead.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

You tell people you’re not trying to drink and they act like you just turned down 100k.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

I’m neither a lover nor a fighter. I’m a snacker.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

I could never abuse substances, they mean a lot to me.

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Just landed via TikTok:

Of course the laundry has to be done, but the wine doesn’t drink itself either.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

This meeting could have been an oil painting.

Live now on WhatsApp:

I hate overhead lighting – trying to mimic the holy sun should be considered sinful. The lamp is much better, mimicking the hearths of our forebears.

Trending via Messenger:

GTA6 should have streams and wetlands so we can work to conserve and restore them.

Spotted on Threads:

I’ve reached a point in my life where if I can’t find parking, I’m just going to go home.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Accidentally manifested an emotionally intelligent man that is hot and can cook. We’re currently staring at each other.

Spreading quickly via LinkedIn:

“What’s love?” Grandma sliding money into my hand like a drug dealer. Yeah, man, that’s love.

Making waves on Reddit:

‘I have a ripe avocado at home’ is my favorite excuse for cancelling plans.

Trending via Reddit:

If you think my posts are horrid, wait until you see the live stream of my colonoscopy.

Just landed via YouTube:

Get in loser. We’re going on a guilt trip.

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Hello, I’m a professor in a movie. I only reach the main point of my lecture right as class is ending. Then I yell at students about the reading / homework as they leave.

Boobs always win. That’s why we don’t play rock, paper, boobs.

I hate to brag, but I’ve been the biggest mistake of numerous people’s lives.

Welcome to your 40s. Your eyes are now like a camera someone doesn’t know how to focus.

I get jealous when I find someone playing a song I thought only I knew.

Nobody sighs louder than an unemployed, debt-free dog who spends at least 16 hours a day sleeping.

The urge to buy people gifts they’ve mentioned they liked once.

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Wordgag ツ

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Hello, I’m a professor in a movie. I only reach the main point of my lecture right as class is ending. Then I yell at students about the reading / homework as they leave.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Boobs always win. That’s why we don’t play rock, paper, boobs.

I hate to brag, but I’ve been the biggest mistake of numerous people’s lives.

Welcome to your 40s. Your eyes are now like a camera someone doesn’t know how to focus.

I get jealous when I find someone playing a song I thought only I knew.

Nobody sighs louder than an unemployed, debt-free dog who spends at least 16 hours a day sleeping.

The urge to buy people gifts they’ve mentioned they liked once.

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Trending Topics 📁

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