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Commentary:
Wow, this sounds exactly like the "Deep Thoughts and Sprint Out" teaching style! Now I know why students are always running out of the classroom. 📚🏃‍♂️😂

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Is my life this bad because I didn’t forward that email to 15 people back in 2007?

2 months ago

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Tonight we shall read a passage from the old testicle.

1 month ago

activity, bible, Bible parody, humor, joke, night, night activity, old, parody, pun, read, reading, testicle, tonight, wordplay
It’s way too easy to lie online. I was just telling Beyoncé about that the other day.

2 months ago

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Forget the alarm clock. Just give me the smell of bacon and coffee.

2 months ago

alarm, alarm clock, bacon, breakfast, clock, coffee, food, forget, give, just, me, morning, smell, wake, wake up
Marriage is so scary. What do you mean I can’t have my own room?

2 weeks ago

commitment, fear, humor, i, marriage, mean, own, relationship, room, scary
Did you ever buy a pack of underwear, take them out, and think, wow, these are huge… then try them on, and they fit perfectly?

2 months ago

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🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

10 shares on Twitch this month:

I wish Amazon would stop finding things I might like.

86 shares on TikTok this month:

Due to the humidity, my hair has chosen violence.

33 shares on WeChat this month:

If it’s a ghost ship, why does it have to be on water?

43 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m only grumpy when I’m awake.

73 shares on Facebook this month:

Some people are like sunglasses: your day just becomes so much brighter when you accidentally drop them off the side of the boat.

83 shares on Reddit this month:

If we were subway rats, I’d share my pizza crust with you.

11 shares on Reddit this month:

Being rich is going to look so cute on me.

33 shares on Facebook this month:

If I was pregnant and people asked when I was due, I would say “What do you mean?”

26 shares on Slack this month:

I wonder if my date ever found her way out of that corn maze.

33 shares on X this month:

It’s funny how sometimes you buy a book, then read it in two days, and sometimes you buy a book, and it lives on your bookshelf for 12 years.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

I hate having a ton of anxiety and no energy. It’s like having a tank full of gas and no engine.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

You can tell a lot about someone based on which Spice Girl they were most attracted to.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

The funniest thing I heard an elder say, “My generation had Wonder Woman, your generation has to wonder if it’s a woman.”

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

It’s only 9am and I’ve already ruined my son’s entire life by giving him the banana with the brown spot on it.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

Sometimes I’m just so exhausted I have to go to bed and scroll my phone for the next 2-3 hours.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

My husband told me that he used my sock trick on a recent trip, so he wouldn’t lose any. Reader, my “sock trick” is rolling matching pairs together.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has viewed:

Starting to think I’m single because of everyone else’s shortcomings.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

Imagine falling in love and then finding out that they put antlers on their car for the holidays.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

Notice how ghosts never wear fitted sheets?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

I changed my alarm clock sound to an applause, it’s the least I deserve for waking up at 7am.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Telegram:

I really wish people would stop thinking they need to speak to me in the mornings.

Going viral on Discord:

Doing dishes is like fighting a hydra — wash one, and two more appear.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Dating scene and the job market are the same right now, just stay where you are.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Had a fight with an erection this morning. Beat it single-handed.

Spotted on WeChat:

Dear diary, I have to lock in tomorrow, fix everything, and do everything.

Making waves on WeChat:

Socialism isn’t wrong because it has compassion. It’s wrong because it doesn’t work.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Texting is so boring. Just show up to my door with roses.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Got the zoomies at work, and now HR is chasing me around with a butterfly net.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Eating healthy requires a second job.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Hello, I’m a professor in a movie. I only reach the main point of my lecture right as class is ending. Then I yell at students about the reading / homework as they leave.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Is my life this bad because I didn’t forward that email to 15 people back in 2007?

Tonight we shall read a passage from the old testicle.

It’s way too easy to lie online. I was just telling Beyoncé about that the other day.

Forget the alarm clock. Just give me the smell of bacon and coffee.

Marriage is so scary. What do you mean I can’t have my own room?

Did you ever buy a pack of underwear, take them out, and think, wow, these are huge… then try them on, and they fit perfectly?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨